Thank you to reliable Wonkette Philly operative “D-mac” for sending us this image from the front page of philly.com earlier today. Ha, the “National Label Company,” WHAT? Whatever it is, they make drugs, orange drugs, and Cindy just starts feeling that itch all over her body.
UNTRIED FELONS
August 4, 2008
Cindy Needs A Fix Like You Wouldn’t Believe
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When you’re the only chick in a photo, and the newspaper feels it necessary to specify which one is you ["second from left"], it’s time to have a good cry.
*Cindy…. call me*
What a trollopy trollop.
And now, gentlefolk — on to…The Box Factory!
She’s reaching out towards them, so gently.
“My fingers smell like duck!”
She may be eying the meds, but look at her left hand. What she needs is a cigarette. Or at least something to sate the oral fixation.
Either that, or she just lost the ability to flex her fingers after the 87th face lift.
Whatever the contents of those bottles might be, she looks like she wants it pretty badly. Her precioussssss….
Isn’t substance abuse a longstanding tradition among First Ladies, and hopeful FLOTUSs?
She looks SOOOO high in that photo.
…geez, look how big Cindy’s hands are! I think she is the one that had a sex change not WALNUTS!
Is is just me or does Cindy have scary man-hands with a French mani? I mean they’re freakin’ huge – and I think she’s about to use her razor sharp claws to stab ole Johnny in the back for that Tylenol Daytime Cold Relief.
he looks like a chipmunk.
…the guy on the far left is the poster boy for bathroom predators!
that’s actually her *masturbating a horse* face and posture.
Oh, and after a brief Google Images search, it’s Liquid Tylenol and Pepcid Complete. If there was any way to get a cougar rush off those, they would have required you to show photo ID to buy them a long time ago.
And every guy has a creepy smile on their faces.
Cindy will be featured in an upcoming episode of “The Cleaner”.
But we may never see it if McCain gets ahold of the “Magick Dirt Eraser” that John Edwards used with masterful precision. “What?! A baby with Rielle Hunter? That story no longer exists… “
That right hand is inching toward the twattage. Just seein’ the dope makes her moist and tender.
HAHA I bet they took inventory before she toured the place.
[re=51562]Canuckledragger[/re]: I assuming you are not referring to the “dope” that is her husband…
[re=51567]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: Oops meant “I assume”….
JonBenet Ramsay didn’t die. She moved to Arizona and became a drug-addled beer heiress.
Oh I know that look…she needs a cig badly.
So that is what a cunt looks like? So much different than the pictures my mommy showed me.
Right hand plays with her own cindy. Ay, me encunta!
[re=51549]Guppy06[/re]: You are exactly right. The first thing I thought when I saw the picture is that Cindy desperately needs a cig to hide her shakes.
[re=51571]The Incomparable Tiny Valdez[/re]: mmm hmmmm
Katie Couric and her interns from Industrial Light and Magic have airbrushed out of the photo the blunt that’s between her fingers (and the clouds of thick dark reefer smoke). Cool!!
Poor Juan, always having to hide the pills and glue and hootch and stuff…..has he checked the private airplane with license plate “MIZBUD” lately??
[re=51547]RuperttheBear[/re]: more likely chicken…
http://www.philly.com/philly/hp/news_update/20080804_Menagerie_of_dead_animals_found_in_Phila__city_park.html
[re=51547]RuperttheBear[/re]: I, for one, found that hilarious. Kudos, my fellow elitist.
MMMmmmmmmmm… stolen charity pharmaceuticals.
You guys are reading this all wrong though – she’s ok on the drugs, but the only thing sustaining the woman is the fresh blood from unicorn hearts, and she’s hell-bent on creating at least ONE MORE HORCRUX before the election, the end.
The sad part of that picture is that everyone except Cindy is higher than Betty Ford…those fuckers are just taunting her.
[re=51553]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: That poor duck…
[re=51558]Guppy06[/re]: Eh, you can still get Robitussin without having to show ID or anything. And I read somewhere recently that kids today get high on Coricidin HBP. Stupid kids, just get the DXM without any of those other chemicals. Or, better yet, there are probably at least 10 drug dealers in your school.
[re=51538]Canuckledragger[/re]:
Fuck! That’s the win of the week, and it’s only monday!
Give Cindy some cred; she’s committed the unabridged PDR (Physician’s Desk Reference) to memory and can call any drug from 20 paces, as evidenced here. You go grrrrrrrrrl.
[re=51558]Guppy06[/re]: Liquid Tylenol & Pepcid Complete mixed with Mentos & Coke
will take your freakin’ head off though. She may jump ship to Pualtardism yet.
Tonight she can wasted and strip down to her thong while leather-chapped McCain dances with topless Buffalo Chip models at Strugis. http://silencedmajority.blogs.com/silenced_majority_portal/2008/08/mccain-in-sturg.html
I thought I felt a shadow pass over the sun here in southeastern PA. But I had no idea Cunty McTrollop and her douchebag of a husband were within 10 miles of me. (shudder)
You’d be jonesing for that Pepsid too if you’d just had the $150/plate luncheon at the Montgomery County Elks Club (complete with Erma Jo’s brussel sprout suprise)!
[re=51562]Canuckledragger[/re]: Unfortunately, moistness in that area can also create a perfect breeding ground for Mitt’s…er,… mites. My Rx: a shot of Jack Daniel’s and Kwelada. Rinse. Repeat.
At any rate, that woman appears to have an itch that needs to be scratched.
Those hands are indeed rather geezery. I’ll have to say that is the nicest picture I’ve seen of Cinders, though. Normally she looks so .. STRAINED!
Cunt.
Oh, fer fuck’s sake. At least she unlaquered her hair. Kinda.
She’s working up to a terrorist fist jab…
The photographer caught her the exact moment she recognized the look on her husband’s face – he’s shitting his pants.
All the guys in that photo have erections. I would have one, too, if I got within five feet of her. Damn it, she makes me forget all about those “celebrity” bitches like Paris.
Ummm, I just re-read the caption.
As the only woman in a roomful of men, why did the editor think it necessary to point out her position as “second from left”?…
Unless…unless..sweet mother of Hades! Cindy is a cross-dresser!! (It’s those man hands. They are a dead giveaway).
Somebody call the Enquirer, PDQ!
[re=51553]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: No kidding. Those aren’t “man hands” in the sense of a woman with big hands. Those are a man’s hands. She became Cindy after she started with the hormones but before she had her penis and testicles removed. Stil working on the fine points of gender reassignment but is making progress.
From the label McCain is Reading:
“If you experience an erection lasting longer than 3 hours, please consult your physician immediately”
Those are smiles that say “Say Cheese.”
Hey, click on the photo below and you can almost read Trollop’s note paper.
http://www.rapidcityjournal.com/articles/2008/08/04/news/top/doc4897d94106dca717274020.txt
HA! I bet Cindy had bugs under her skin being so close to that crowd, and having to dress down for the honor as well. Xanax, sweet sweet Xanaxzzzzz…
Did she shake her tits at the crowd, or did Meaghan? They couldn’t have been cheering for Gramps.
[re=51830]villageatrois[/re]: McCain said “Ich bin ein Harley Davidson!” I think she just threw her thong to the crowd. Wonkette has no Sturgis operative? Vrrrooooom vrooommmmm!
[re=51832]Darehead[/re]: Now I see it! She’s sniffing her left hand. The right-on-twat is a decoy. Wonkette sent a half dozen operatives to Sturgis, but none of them are conscious. Cindy bought them a boatload of suds to wash down their, uhh, air-travel medications.
[re=51836]villageatrois[/re]: Ha! Wonk-operatives are probably so smashed listening to REO and KISS they couldn’t decide whether to take their bottom or their tops off. BTW, if any of you are still alive, remember to keep your redneck cover. THEY KILL LIBERALS don’t they?
Seriously, if you double click and make the photo BIG, Cindy may not be exposing her tits in the photo [re=51818]Darehead[/re]: but she is exposing the contents of that hand-written note–it says, “John……” Anybody get the rest?
Poor Cindy!! That jar of Dial antibacterial liquid soap in Juan’s hand is chock full of yummy chemicals (and just a tich of alcohol.) What with Juan hiding all her drugs, she’s gonna have a hard time replacing her polydactyl space lizard nutrients without it.
What Juan doesn’t know is that Miz Good Bud has been feeding him small quantities of the stuff in his morning OJ. It’s what has kept their marriage, uh, sanctified and pure all these long years, what with his erectial dysfunction and low testosterone levels
http://onemansblog.com/2008/06/02/anti-bacterial-soap-inhibits-testosterone-production/
Now if she could just get him to calm down and stop throwing things, the children – born from space lizard eggs fertilized by Red Dust from the Visitor Fleet – could move back home and everyone could be normal again.
One of these things is not like the others.
[re=51839]Darehead[/re]: I get::
Jack #3
Timing (or Jimay)
Thank y (or 4)
Systems
Troops
–cole
“John, use speech #3, remember to say thank you to all the Systems Engineers and Troops. Love, Nicole (or whoever you want me to play tonight)”
She looks like she is fixin to put a hex on John McCain to keep him from aging. One more male virgin must be sacrificed and in the process she needs to pop a pill for good luck.
[re=51858]WonkaBee[/re]: Haha, that’s good spy work there.
The vid’s on the same site and she does say JACK. Now, I don’t listen to Cindy or US TV much; is he ever called JACK? Is that to make him more like JFK or Jack McCall (who killed Wild Barry Hickok)? Maybe it’s her short term memory problem?
And then she mentions her son “Jimmy,” also a vet.
Then, she passed the note over to JACK like you said…
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