Oh good God what is going on today? Pretty much every publication in the country has a big article about how John McCain — the guy who just attacked Barack Obama for being all style and no substance — knows literally nothing about anything, and just blurts out a random arrangement of words whenever he’s asked about foreign or domestic policy. As a consequence, he comes off sounding underinformed and not terribly interested in the details of governance, not to mention possibly senile and a little bit retarded.
A little gem from the deputy editorial page editor of your liberal daily rag, the Wall Street Journal:
On Sunday, he said on national television that to solve Social Security “everything’s on the table,” which of course means raising payroll taxes. On July 7 in Denver he said: “Senator Obama will raise your taxes. I won’t.”
This isn’t a flip-flop. It’s a sex-change operation.
He got back to the subject Tuesday in Reno, Nev. Reporters asked about the Sunday tax comments. Mr. McCain replied, “The worst thing you could do is raise people’s payroll taxes, my God!” Then he was asked about working with Democrats to fix Social Security, and he repeated, “everything has to be on the table.” But how can . . .? Oh never mind.
And then this thing from that “John McCain is an idiot, but he has Core Values that come from his Gut” article in the Washington Post:
[I]n a speech this past spring, McCain called for expelling Russia from the Group of Eight, the club of leading economic powers, on the grounds that Russia is not a real democracy. Not long after, he gave a speech in Denver on arms control and suggested that the United States “can work in partnership with Russia to strengthen protections against weapons of mass destruction.”
“Would that happen before or after we kick them out of the G-8?” quipped a Republican arms control expert who held high positions in previous Republican administrations.
The most tragic thing about the next three months will be watching John McCain try to catch up on all of the news he has been ignoring for the past 50 years. It will be like that Rocky montage where he exercises and eats raw eggs, except it will be John McCain reading the large-print edition of Congressional Quarterly and falling asleep with his mouth open.
Is John McCain Stupid? [Wall Street Journal]
The Curious Mind of John McCain [Washington Post]
{ 88 comments }
Our first ADA President.
Senile is an improvement over just plain stupid.
Because, you know, you can’t have a robust economy that could control the world without American-style two-party oligarchical corruption. Russia’s one-party deal is just too Roman.
You can denegrate Senator McCain all you want, but one thing you cannot do is call him Gay.
The picture is of John McCain learning where babies come from.
Yes my friends, Walnuts is not an ultra smart skinny elitist who hangs out with Paris.
What really is sad is that he was probably the best candidate of the Republican field. 9ud1? No way. Mittens? Too Mormony. Huckabee? Too Jeebusy in a help people over and not the usual fuck them up the ass or kill’em kind of way.
Said “Grampa” Abe McCain: “My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he is not a porn star!”
Unrelated- but the opening frame of the corn ad makes me think that it’s time for a new waxing trend.
More like Rodney Dangerfield studying for his finals in “Back to School”.
It is never more sweet and delicious as when they turn on one of their own. How long before the WSJ outright calls him senile?
At this point Cartman would be a better Pres than this guy, cause at least with Cartman you know what his motivations are and he totally sticks to his assertions. And you can totally handle Cartman with some Dog Whisperer techniques.
And sadly, the cocopheny from the MSM will be; “Is Obama One of Us?”
He’s an idiot? Oh, crap. Oh, crap. He’s gonna win the election. Oh, crap.
Great. All the members of the journalistic persuasion are saying Grampa’s senile. All those pointy-headed eggheads and librul chattering classes.
McCain’s gonna eke it out by a hair in the end, isn’t he?
Time to go drink now…
[re=49860]Godot[/re]: So I tied an onion to my belt…which was the style at the time.
Now that you mention it, WALNUTS! doesn’t seem quite hungry enough for the Presidency. Hopey has all that audacity, while WALNUTS! just seems tired and grumpy. If WALNUTS! somehow pulls off a win, he can always hire Dick Cheney as a consultant.
American Apparel needs to change its ad, don’t you think? That, or more on Monica Goodling.
I have core values that come from my gut, too. They include bile, spleen and a bunch of unpleasant shit.
I TOLD ya and I TOLD ya. The campaign of John McLame is inherently unstable due to his conflicted nature, approaching schizophrenia. He whirls more than a dervish, back when dervish whirled and it wasn’t racist or whatever.
“So, which persona are we talking with now?”
Joe Biden, eat your heart out!
He was much saner as a maverick, but you can’t buck your party and fuck it, too. Er. Make love to it. You know, say you’re in love with it to get it into bed. A ‘buck and fuck’, as ’twere.
[re=49874]WadISay[/re]: Congratulations, you’re qualified to run for Senate as a Republican!
[re=49873]RuperttheBear[/re]: Monica would definitely dress the SWIM babe in drapes.
This youtube vid captures it pretty well… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fvvNU7fBxk
He’s just a playa doing what playas do.
John McBush is just a place holder, sort of a straw dog to keep the media occupied until just before the election, when he will either drop out for unreleased reasons or drop dead.
He will be replaced by a fresh and squeaky clean Mitt Romney, Mike Huckabee, or another of that neo-right religious ilk who will arrive at that election time fresh and clean in the public mind from not having gone through all of the months under a tough pre-election press microscope.
Try to remember that you read about this “October Surprise” here, long before the event, but act surprised dammit!!!
Jerryw
http://boskolives.wordpress.com/
It’s quite a coup to get the Wall Street Journal & WaPo against you if you’re a Republican. I mean they are the two biggest pro-Repub papers in the world.
During the debates, he will freeze in mid-sentence, smoke will pour out of his ears and his eyes will pop out dangling from wire springs.
And he’ll still win the election.
Jesus, he’s lost the WSJ and Andrea Mitchell in the same week.
He might as well decline the nomination; it’s his only hope of salvaging any honor now.
Sounds like his ‘base’ is throwing him under a boxy, diesel-fuel vehicle used for mass transportation.
This “stupid” theme in McWalnuts own mouthpiece, the Walnuts Street Urinal? Let’s consider the rrrrrrrest of the story, my friends.
Meanwhile every newspaper on earth is also reporting that the King of Evangelicals, Prophet James Dobson, may, just may, bring his flock to McCain after having cursed McCain and damned him to hell to all eternity.
I say [re=49869]SayItWithWookies[/re]: is right on the money. Stupid is as stupid does….a big flock tease on Dobson to show that McCain ain’t no elitist globetrotting, fact-flinging Bilderburger. Fundies don’t want anyone who eats forbidden fruit from the Tree of Knowledge. The thing with Fundies is they can always get God’s permission to flip-flop. The other thing is they love persecution. The more McCain gets called an idiot by the MSM, the more Dobstards will say, ‘Hey, he’s one of US.’
I pity you Americans, I really do. Either “Zimmer” McCain or Obama (Jerusalem will remain undivided,) will be President. A leading British left winger, feminist author Germain Greer, described Obama’s much hyped Berlin speech as odious and repulsive, dismissing it as “flled with the cliche’s of a motivational speaker.
Over here you see we’re not prepared to believe Obama’s farts smell of perfume. He is populat simply because he is neither Bush not bush’s anointed successor. But he does seem to be building up a lot of trust issues with the Americann people.
Let’s hope the Democrats come to their senses and dump him at the convention.
http://greenteeth.blog.co.uk/
[re=49894]Delicious[/re]: I’m hoping to see that vein in his temple start throbbing during a debate where he’s getting creamed and then for him to stroke out right there on stage before a live audience of millions (who tuned in to see Barry). If this wish makes me evil, then I’m evil.
[re=49873]RuperttheBear[/re]: agreed. that trollop looks like she stumbled out of a pcb beachside bar after something was put in her drink.
His problem is that his wife’s a cunt and a trollop. I know that would turn me into an idiot.
The Obama campaign could do such a great series of ads showing McCain’s back and forth on every imaginable issue, using juxtaposed video clips. My fear is that they are all standing around Obama HQ in togas and sandals, commissioning poetry.
[re=49879]jagorev[/re]: Thanks, but I find myself strangely drawn to members of the opposite sex.
[re=49905]boggart[/re]: At least we got better teeth than them Brits, I’ll tell ya that.
I LOVE the Congressional Quarterly!
The papers may call him an idiot, but it’s the fools who will vote him in as the next president, I fear.
[re=49855]Pop Socket[/re]: “Senile is an improvement over just plain stupid.”
You must not remember Reagan.
[re=49905]boggart[/re]: I’m sorry did you just pull Germaine Greer out of mothballs?
Let’s hope the Democrats come to their senses and dump him at the convention.
AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA…..
Oh, wait, you really think that’s a possibility?
Oh.
Um.
………go Arsenal!
[re=49905]boggart[/re]: Really, should a Brit ever link to something that has ‘greenteeth’ and ‘uk’ in the same url?
“blurts out a random arrangement of words whenever he’s asked about foreign or domestic policy”
I believe this to be absolutely correct re: McCain.
Maybe this needs to be hammered away at, until people begin to realize it. Luckily, we have the WaPo and the WSJ to lead the way in waking up the population to the truth.
however, I also agree with above posts that Dobson et al. will come to the rescue, and that Walnuts will be dumped before the election (unless THEY realize how badly things are fucked now and want to let Obama preside over a Depression for 4 years), and that Hopey could very very easily turn out to be a motivational speaker. we are doomed. Doomed!
[re=49905]boggart[/re]: Let’s hope the Democrats come to their senses and dump him at the convention.
So are you suggesting that there’s another Democrat with a chance of getting elected president who has even the slightest foreign policy differences with Barack Obama — especially with regards to Israel? God, I love British comedy!
“McCain: Stupid You Can Believe In”
[re=49905]boggart[/re]: Germaine Greer is a cliche riddled motivational speaker. Jeebus, The Female Eunuch? Sorta like Tony Robbins meets Xena the Warrior Princess.
McCain is making Bush look like a Mensa member. Based on their last 4 nominees, I would guess they would need to nominate a bag of frozen peas or pink hair extensions to keep the trend going.
[re=49905]boggart[/re]: I thought Germaine Greer was no longer with us.
…WALNUTS! had a sex change? So that is what he has been storing in cheek pouch!!!
[re=49905]boggart[/re]: Over here you see we’re not prepared to believe Germaine Greer’s queefs smell of perfume.
[re=49868]freakishlystrong[/re]: JUst a slob waiting on a bus.
[re=49891]pastor mike[/re]: Ummmmm….. Pastor Mike, shouldn’t you be somewhere prepraing for the Rapture?
[re=49905]boggart[/re]:
“Over here you see we’re not prepared to believe Obama’s farts smell of perfume.”
But he was just across the pond getting brains from you.
[re=49905]boggart[/re]: Fuck you, damn foreigner. Who cares what you or that German Greer or whatever thinks. Come back when you can vote here in the U.S. of damn A!
[re=49983]lilblackcorvette[/re]: I’m betting the final sign for the Rapture will be an angelic voice booming “WAKE UP PEOPLE!”
[re=49891]pastor mike[/re]: You’re overthinking this dude. Do you know any good fart jokes?
silly wonketteers, Germaine Greer is probably pretty cool I’m guessing. Boggart, who do you suggest they dump Obama for at the convention? Can you get Greer?
larz: last 4(?!?!) nominees… you cut that off right before Ford? because he was smarter than a bag of frozen peas? or if you count McCain, you cut that off right before Reagan!?! or maybe me no count so good.
[re=49869]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Am I not the only one who thinks that? I sincerely believed that the nation would notice Dubya’s retardation, and they never did. I shudder for the future of this country.
Dear Sara – that last line made me snarf hot coffee. I officially am in love with your snark over the other guys.
I heard Larry Craig keeps that photo framed in his bathroom, for inspiration.
[re=49972]jasonelias[/re]: she is still with, just old. born 1939. She’s the one with “if we’re annoying them, we must be doing something right” philosophy beaten to death by that Rick Davis coven.
[re=49910]Rev. Peter Lemonjello[/re]: Wait. That’s pretty fap worthy right there.
[re=49905]boggart[/re]:
Germain Greer, described Obama’s much hyped Berlin speech as odious and repulsive, dismissing it as “flled with the cliche’s of a motivational speaker.
She must have missed the rhetoric that gushed out of the last three two-term Presidents we’ve had over here. Sentimental clichés, demons and motivational jabbering are pretty much all Americans want to hear about. Don’t talk down to us about New World Orders or energy policy, tell us about our winning anger prosperity values!
[re=49904]Darehead[/re]: I bin tryin’ to prepare yer Wonkerdudes for this PastorMike types. Seez, the fundies don’t know whether to book their hotel in Minneapolis or St. Paul. It’s such a dilemma! If McCain shows himself to be stupid enough and picks Huckabee, then the fundies will go to the regular old GOPfest in St. Paul. But if McCain starts showin’ us some brains and picks someone who flipflops on abortion like Romney, then the fundies will go to the alter-GOPfest Paultardpalooza in Minneapolis.
It’s just so phenom-anal, this double herd of elephantsssssss!
Wow, what a surreal week this has been. Next thing you know, Pat Robertson’ll be trample by gay penguins and flamingoes. Now that would be the cherry on top, if you’ll pardon the pun.
Okay, nobody panic. Clearly Pastor Mike is looking for something missing in his life and wandered in here to have a look ’round. No sudden movements and I think we’ll be okay. As to Dr. Greenteeth British Guy: seriously? You limey fruits have been going through Prime Ministers like Kleenex. See, we LEFT you guys and worked out a new and improved way to run the place. So we’re a Leader of the Free World kind of nation and you’re still the place with the guards people try and get to move whilst having their picture taken. And, just curious, when exactly did you last have a leader who was A: not white and B: inspirational?! I like McHopey on account of he’s different; not just another old white guy looking to get some for himself. Watch and learn baby.
[re=49905]boggart[/re]: Germaine Greer! God, what a blast from the past. A “leading British left winger?” (Umm… actually she was born in Australia.) I hardly think she’s a leader of anything these days. Which makes her the perfect running mate for Walnuts!
[re=49905]boggart[/re]: Yesssss, yessss, Germain Greer!!! This is exactly what we need!! Behold, a real, live capital-C card carrying Communist!!! YAY……..!!!
Seez, we ‘mericans we ain’t got no real Communists. OK, there is a little woosy CPUSA but they only got 4 people and they endorsed Obama cuz they got no other friends.
With REAL Communists criticizin’ our Barry Hope, why then, he won’t be the imaginary Communist the conservatives see with their red-colored glasses.
[re=50037]irisheyes[/re]: I thought Gordon Brown was Jamaican. That’s the cool, right? p.s. I hate your post.
[re=49942]warreno[/re]: Don’t remember too many endless wars of occupation and half-trillion dollar deficits and on the Gipper’s watch, but I may have missed something. Hell, I’d let the next president have all the chubby chasing Oval Office BJs he wanted if we could have balanced budgets again.
Besides, senile is just a mask for craven.
[re=49891]pastor mike[/re]: Pastor Mike, how did you find Wonkette and why do you find it interesting? Nothing personal, but you do realize that this entire website is all about mocking people like you. Maybe you should pray to God as to who to vote for….
If America elects McCain, I personally would like to start the war to have the blue state secede from the Union. I am so fucking tired of religious, middle American idiots.
[re=50052]yellowdogdem[/re]: yeah, old is not the cool. Our Time Is Now.
[re=50037]irisheyes[/re]: you tell ‘em , honey! Plus their Prince killed my girl Diana! Explain that Mr. Quoter of Decrepit Feminists.
[re=50066]pinko-commie[/re]: Here’s another way to accomplish your mission.
Hey [re=49891]pastor mike[/re]: Wanna Fuck?
[re=49891]pastor mike[/re]: You are Mike Huckaby AICM5P.
[re=50064]Norbert[/re]: Hey- why so harsh? Just a little friendly snark amongst friends, yeah? Make a little batch of Wonkettinis and relax, it’s the weekend.
go ahead and mock, mockers. But I’m with PastorMike — nothin’ says good for economy like Huckabee
[re=50097]irisheyes[/re]: sorry. (can’t relax. it’s genetic.) your snark was a little too effective. good idea re: wonkettini.
[re=50004]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: Yeah, but a whole generation of disgruntled rebellious voters has grown up since Bush’s election. The key will be bussing their asses to the booths from college campuses this fall.
[re=50117]AxmxZ[/re]: And busing their asses, too – although frankly, a little ass-kissing might not be amiss.
[re=49891]pastor mike[/re]: The fact that you are probably like the vast majority of the American public makes me weep.
[re=49905]boggart[/re]:
stay the fuck away from Hopey. OK? Brits cant vote in this election, buddy.
pastor mike: better review Mr. Obamas energy plan once again. It seems you are confused.
McCain is confused?!?!?
For reals!
[re=50065]Pop Socket[/re]: The “Gipper” couldn’t remember his watch either. Or his keys. He was senile for eight years–but was always pretty stupid before he got Alzheimer’s.
The American Commie Party REFUSED to endorse a candidate this year.
Except to say they deplored Bush and the Republicans.
Right on.
I don’t see why this would be a downside for mccain, seeing as how idiots tend to *win* the presidential election… just sayin’
[re=50162]sati demise[/re]: This info from June:
http://americanpowerblog.blogspot.com/2008/07/communist-party-backs-obama.html
Warning: Link shows image of Communism.
Did they change their mind?
[re=50066]pinko-commie[/re]: Don’t blame all those religious, middle Americans out there for not wanting to vote for Obama. They don’t know that much about him (he’s black), he doesn’t have that much experience (he’s black), hasn’t accomplished much (he has a funny name), and doesn’t give much specifics in his speeches (he’s black). Plus, he’s a bit of an arugula eating elitist who’s not in touch with the common, hard working, blue collar types (he’s black and has a funny name).
[re=50162]sati demise[/re]: OOps, above link was neocon site that was exaggerating a Communist party appraisal of Obama: Original here:
http://www.pww.org/article/articleview/13259/1/443/ (warning: a Communist-written article)
So, guess you are right, no “real” endorsement though McCainies and Paultards are sayin’ so.
boggart: I’m sorry to say that Greer is one of ours, but you are welcome to her. Can’t imagine why she hasn’t taken out British citizenship yet given her contempt for our Fair Isle. But geez, what a tour de force she is: “motivational speaker,” eh? Whiny, much?
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