SNUFF FILMS  4:26 pm July 29, 2008

The RNC Is On Fire Today (Not Literally)

by Jim Newell

Working for the Republican National Committee would be so freaking fun. When your electorate consists of the dumbest shits in the country, even the simplest, most transparent appeals to nativism, homophobia, or provincialism will preserve your monolithic base’s loyalty for decades. And so here’s the latest creative output from the RNC — which, along with BarackBook.com, constitutes the “July 29 RNC Twofer.” It is a comical video about what an Obama commercial in Germany would look like. Deep techno beats, robots, gay flashing colors, David Hasselhoff, anti-American German interviews, various other Eurotrash tropes. And you must watch the very end. Oh, it’s really not an option. [YouTube]

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 76 comments }

Advocatus_Diaboli July 29, 2008 at 4:29 pm

Well that’s a minute 8 seconds of my life I would rather have back.

Terry July 29, 2008 at 4:29 pm

Good Lord, with all the money the RNC has, couldn’t they hire a production firm?

SayItWithWookies July 29, 2008 at 4:30 pm

Wow — the party of ideas has spoken.
Q: What would a German Obama ad look like?
A: It will be very, very small.

Sharif DelMonte July 29, 2008 at 4:30 pm

What is most surprising about this advert is the apparently open courting of Gay Republicans for Obama. If Gay Republicans don’t vote McCain, which Republicans will?

shortsshortsshorts July 29, 2008 at 4:30 pm

AHAHAA SO MANY FLASHY LIGHTS MY HEART HAS SEIZED!!!

BadNewsJack July 29, 2008 at 4:31 pm

Can we light the RNC on fire Literally for such stupid ideas?

The Real JR Revisted July 29, 2008 at 4:31 pm

FYI: The Facebook for BarackBook has been fudged with so that all the wallposts and topics have been expunged. But, lol, that doesn’t stop the wankery.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=616591228#/reviews/see_all.php?of=23308630814

Walter Sobchak July 29, 2008 at 4:31 pm

It would have been better if they’d shown the Hoff drunkenly eating a cheeseburger with Barry’s head at the end. (With the same audio.)

ManchuCandidate July 29, 2008 at 4:32 pm

I just want to ask one question. How is this going to help the Repubs?

Botswana Meat Commission FC July 29, 2008 at 4:32 pm

Blonde German girls who hate Americans really turn me on.

FreshCliches July 29, 2008 at 4:32 pm

Now ist da time venn vee dahhhnce! Touch unser Obama! Loooooove himmm!

jagorev July 29, 2008 at 4:34 pm

That was surprisingly classy. I’m shocked they didn’t go for Riefenstahl clips and the Horst Wessel lied.

columnv July 29, 2008 at 4:34 pm

That was wonderful, especially the “Titanic” reference at the end…it all looks so good before Obama hits a giant iceberg that he can’t quite see from the bow of his giant fucking boat and slowly sinks in the ice water with 1000 white people.

Landstander July 29, 2008 at 4:36 pm

Wanna know what happens when you stand by our side as one of our most important military allies and trading partners? We mock your sorry German asses.

kudzu July 29, 2008 at 4:37 pm

[re=47075]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Simple: if the foreigns like it, you must hate it. That’s how the Repugs get the base energized.

Not_So_Much July 29, 2008 at 4:38 pm

Wow, what a crappy rip-off of The Daily Show into bit for “Obama Quest” all last week.

At least TDS was amusing. Not sure what our response to this is supposed to be. Maybe a Pokemon flashing lights-induced seizure?

Donkey Sauce July 29, 2008 at 4:39 pm

The Titanic reference is relevant because everyone knows that the Titanic was tragically sunk by German U-boats.

freakishlystrong July 29, 2008 at 4:39 pm

That had “South Park” production values, without the funny..

jagorev July 29, 2008 at 4:41 pm

[re=47089]Donkey Sauce[/re]: You mean Muslim U-boats. We fought the Muslims in World War 2, IDIOT.

AnnieGetYourFun July 29, 2008 at 4:42 pm

Sigh. They took down all the stuff from Barackbook.

MargeSimpsonsBlackFriend July 29, 2008 at 4:42 pm

Ow! My epilepsy!

AnnieGetYourFun July 29, 2008 at 4:43 pm

Fuck. First Scrabulous and now this. Why? Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?

freakishlystrong July 29, 2008 at 4:46 pm

[re=47094]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: Nah, THAT barackbook is still up…

Naked Bunny with a Whip July 29, 2008 at 4:47 pm

(Not Literally)

False advertising. I’d sue if I thought you guys had any money in your pockets. Or had pockets. Or were wearing pants.

Donkey Sauce July 29, 2008 at 4:47 pm

[re=47093]jagorev[/re]: Oh, right. The Islamonazis.

pondscum July 29, 2008 at 4:48 pm

[re=47101]Naked Bunny with a Whip[/re]: We’re all from Lincoln Nebraska – pants optional.

Noodle Salad July 29, 2008 at 4:48 pm

The GOP has yet to discover that magical space that exists between “Totally lame” and “Shockingly offensive”.

Q2 July 29, 2008 at 4:49 pm

[re=47075]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Indeed. Just what is the point, besides we is stupid I mean.

NotUrEvryDayWEzl July 29, 2008 at 4:49 pm

[re=47071]The Real JR Revisted[/re]: YES WE CAN!

nietzscheprojectile July 29, 2008 at 4:50 pm

I myself love the dubbed translations. But, since this is on teh computers will McCain’s base actually see it?

WhatTheHeck July 29, 2008 at 4:51 pm

Thanks Jim. That flashing, pulsating techno crap gave me a headache
and now I want to vote republican. I love GWB. Oh my head.

Naked Bunny with a Whip July 29, 2008 at 4:51 pm

[re=47104]pondscum[/re]: /me starts packing his stuff

Larry Fine July 29, 2008 at 4:51 pm

Where are Seigfried and Roy when you need them?

mookworthjwilson July 29, 2008 at 4:55 pm

[re=47105]Noodle Salad[/re]: From the Republicans I know, it just ain’t gonna happen…

NotUrEvryDayWEzl July 29, 2008 at 4:59 pm

[re=47093]jagorev[/re]: We have always been at war with the Muslims. There has never been a time when we weren’t at war the Muslims. We fought for independence from the Muslims. We freed the slaves from the muslims. We captured and saved Cuba, Puerto Rico and the Philippines from the Muslims. Then we kicked ass in Muslim Europe, and destroyed the Muslim wall.

Hooray For Anything July 29, 2008 at 5:00 pm

It’s kinda hard to believe in watching this that the same minds who came up with it have been winning most elections since 1994. Not to mention running the country.

larz July 29, 2008 at 5:02 pm

Wow! The RNC went all out when hiring the PS 151 Television Club (well those that could get permission slips signed by their parents) to make their videos.

AxmxZ July 29, 2008 at 5:03 pm

And this is… *not* a parody?

Yeah, this electio is over.

AxmxZ July 29, 2008 at 5:04 pm

[re=47118]Hooray For Anything[/re]: Well, for an arbitrary definition of “running.” Crawling, maybe.

AxmxZ July 29, 2008 at 5:04 pm

[re=47124]AxmxZ[/re]: This election, even. Not enough truck nuts in the world.

Monsieur Grumpe July 29, 2008 at 5:05 pm

The Germans just want someone in charge of all those nukes who has an IQ greater than a moldy turnip. Is that so unreasonable?

KevoTron July 29, 2008 at 5:08 pm

[re=47071]The Real JR Revisted[/re]: Oh my God that was so much freaking fun though. [re=47069]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: You’re the only friend left on that Facebook application. Lonely at the top ‘eh Shorts?

off-white working class July 29, 2008 at 5:09 pm

WOW A REFERENCE FROM TITANIC?!?!?! so clever! OMG remember how cool the girls w/mom jeans, greasy hair and ill fitting t-shirts thought they were for seeing the movie like 10 or more times in theatres?!?

NotUrEvryDayWEzl July 29, 2008 at 5:09 pm

[re=47129]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: Turnips are high in Dietary Fiber, Vitamin C, Vitamin B6, Folate, Calcium, Potassium and Copper. The turnip is a vital source of vitamins and this is why it is valued greatly in Northern China, as well as many other countries. I find your insult of Brassica rapa rapa offensive.

flyingspaghettimonster July 29, 2008 at 5:11 pm

the 2 saddest words I have read today… “not literally”

N8Ma July 29, 2008 at 5:11 pm

YEE HAW!

AxmxZ July 29, 2008 at 5:11 pm

[re=47135]NotUrEvryDayWEzl[/re]: “…And then the woman opens her eyes and asks, ‘Where is that magnificent rapa rapa?’”

Political Addict July 29, 2008 at 5:12 pm

But which one was worse, the MoveOn egg ad, or this abomination? (Not that there’s anything wrong with abominations.) It’s going to be a long 99 days, folks.

TGY July 29, 2008 at 5:12 pm

[re=47062]Advocatus_Diaboli[/re]: Good enough for me. I ain’t watchin’ it.

Godot July 29, 2008 at 5:13 pm

That last shot is almost as good as some of the “Night at the Roxbury” YTMND’s people were doing 3 or 4 years ago.

Almost.

Noodle Salad July 29, 2008 at 5:21 pm

[re=47113]mookworthjwilson[/re]: I don’t really expect it to happen. I just wonder why they continue to advertise their comedic shortcomings. Compensation, perhaps?

lazynamepicker July 29, 2008 at 5:29 pm

Has the RNC outsourced its advertising to Hillary’s trailer crusaders?

NoWireHangers July 29, 2008 at 5:31 pm

Republicans can’t tell you why WALNUTS! should win, but they love to tell you why Obama should lose–not coherently though.

Volumptuous July 29, 2008 at 5:32 pm

This is my favorite music-video ever. I really want to gay-out right now.

Hominidx July 29, 2008 at 5:32 pm

MAN WHAT

Monsieur Grumpe July 29, 2008 at 5:35 pm

[re=47135]NotUrEvryDayWEzl[/re]:

You should get together with this guy. He looks like fun.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AkvnqswlhWU

AxmxZ July 29, 2008 at 5:51 pm

Buggering arse, is it down?

RuperttheBear July 29, 2008 at 6:03 pm

[re=47069]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: That was probably the exstacies pill.

Tawmn July 29, 2008 at 6:10 pm

Septuagenarians with Trio T-Shirts.

problemwithcaring July 29, 2008 at 6:18 pm

This biggest knock against this ad is that is the Repub-version of what a MoveOn.org ad would look like in the same context – so limply pejorative as to render itself hideously unfunny.

I mean, where are the Hitler references? Are the GOPers falling off?

tepid sunshine July 29, 2008 at 6:46 pm

I actually cannot believe this isn’t a joke.

sati demise July 29, 2008 at 6:53 pm

Marx is the new Hitler.

Tell me again, why is Hopey a Marxist?

Anonymous Office Zombie July 29, 2008 at 6:58 pm

Who would have totally seen this one coming a mile away? Oh yeah, right, that would be me…

http://wonkette.com/401398/somehow-john-mccain-is-basically-tied-with-barack-obama#comment-43339

I’m tempted to believe that Republicans exaggerate their lack of aesthetic sensibilities because otherwise they might somehow be accused of having caught The Gay.

The Incomparable Tiny Valdez July 29, 2008 at 6:59 pm

I think the Obama campaign could learn a few things from this kind of marketing savvy. I mean, duh?!

GoLikeHellMachine July 29, 2008 at 7:17 pm

Apparently, the GOP doesn’t want McCain to win, either!

I can’t fucking believe this is real. You can’t make this shit up!

thatonegirlsays July 29, 2008 at 7:22 pm

If only they knew how insanely brilliant this really is. It’s kind of magical, actually.

mookworthjwilson July 29, 2008 at 7:45 pm

[re=47118]Hooray For Anything[/re]: I believe they are running the country, I mean look at what shape we’re in, but the winning elections thing is kind of amazing…

AxmxZ July 29, 2008 at 7:57 pm

[re=47256]GoLikeHellMachine[/re]: I used to be skeptical when people told me this, but now I believe, I believe, oh Lawd, I believe!

anabellum July 29, 2008 at 8:07 pm

[re=47233]Anonymous Office Zombie[/re]: i do believe youve hit on something….rather like the christian relationship to music…

Combover July 29, 2008 at 8:48 pm

[re=47093]jagorev[/re]: He’s actually talking about WWI, fool! But you’re right. It was the muslims.

crookedE July 29, 2008 at 9:30 pm

I’m impressed. For the first time, a person wearing a Che Guevara teeshirt seemed to have some idea who Che Guevara was.

Johnny Zhivago July 29, 2008 at 9:33 pm

[re=47328]Combover[/re]: Just don’t mention the war!

DangerousLiberal July 29, 2008 at 10:42 pm

Here’s what a McCain campaign rally looks like in Serbia: http://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/2008/07/29/world/29serbia-600.jpg

The whole story is here. http://www.nytimes.com/2008/07/30/world/europe/30serbia.html?hp

Check out the A&F frat boy in lower left center. And a guy in the middle whose Serbian name translates as “bubba”

Larry McAwful July 30, 2008 at 7:49 am

I thought it was just Bush who was out to get every single foreign country to hate America’s guts. Now I realize that’s the mission of the Republican party. What are there, 180 countries or something? That’s going to take some effort, but if we elect John McCain, we can be well on our way to pissing off everyone else, closing the borders, militarizing like crazy and creating “Fortress America.” WOLVERIIIIIINES!!!!!!

snig July 30, 2008 at 8:04 am

I was waiting for a tagline like:
“Barak Obama. If Foreigners like him, doesn’t that raise red flags? Vote for McCain, another acedemically challenged chucklehead that world thinks is batshit.”

snig July 30, 2008 at 8:06 am

Actually, this is how they’d play it in Peoria:

“Foreigners caused 9/11. Foreigners are killing our troops. Foreigners like Barack Obama. Any questions?”

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