Add to Flipboard Magazine.

Today, a federal grand jury indicted Alaskan Sen. Ted Stevens on seven counts of “filing false financial disclosures.” Stevens is the biggest catch in a four-year-old corruption investigation involving pretty much all Alaskan politicians, one that’s complicated not because of the crimes committed — lots of bribery, basically — but because there was so freaking much crime to investigate. His indictment comes almost exactly a year after federal agents raided his home, and now he will go to jail and lose his Senate seat and remind everyone how evil the powerful Republicans are.

Basically, a company offered Stevens money, gifts, and services, and he accepted them and then lied about it (he didn’t really think this one through):

The seven-count indictment charges Stevens with making false statements by failing to disclose things of value he received from the Veco Corp., an Alaska-based oil services company, and from its CEO, Bill Allen, over an eight-year period. The indictment charges that those included substantial improvements to Stevens’ home in Girdwood; automobile exchanges in which he received new vehicles that were worth far more than the old ones he exchanged; and household goods.

At the same time, according to the indictment, Stevens received solicitations for official actions from Allen and other Veco employees, and used his office on behalf of Veco. The federal Ethics in Government Act requires all senators to file financial disclosure statements detailing their transactions during the previous calendar year, including the disclosure of gifts above a specified value and all liabilities greater than $10,000.


Just a year ago, federal agents raided Mr. Stevens’ home following questions about renovations at the home. A few months before that, an Alaska businessman Bill J. Allen admitted to bribery, and in court papers acknowledged making $243,000 in possibly illegal payments to a state lawmaker identified only as “Senator B.” That abbreviation referred to Senator Ted Stevens’s son, Ben Stevens.

Eh, such a boring investigation. It would be cooler if he was indicted for like… trying to have sex with little Malaysian boys… or duck-fucking… being a fat loser… whatever.

Ted Stevens indicted on corruption charges [Anchorage Daily News]
Senator Ted Stevens Indicted in Corruption Case [NYT/The Caucus]

Previous articleMoonie Times: Jon Voight's Insane Op-Ed Rant Against Barack Obama
Next articleJohn Kerry Party Boat Craziness!