• May 26, 2012

Crippled War Vets Tell Cheney To Get Bent

by Ken Layne  1:58 pm July 28, 2008

Despised warmonger Dick Cheney continues to be an evil sack of shit who can’t even pretend to like war veterans. The hate-filled colostomy bag was scheduled to lecture a group of injured war veterans about how he evaded the draft through five deferments, but the veterans group finally told him to get fucked after he demanded the maimed heroes be sequestered for hours before he delivered his bitter propaganda.

Cheney was supposed to speak at the Disabled Veterans of America convention in Las Vegas next month, but the evil scumsack demanded the old, crippled soldiers go through a humiliating security process and then be locked in the auditorium for two hours before Cheney would deliver his canned bullshit — and nobody would be allowed to leave until the asshole finished!

Many of the vets are elderly and left pieces of themselves on foreign battlefields since World War II, and others were crippled by recent service in Iraq and Afghanistan. For health reasons, many can’t be stuck in a room for hours.

“It was a huge imposition on our delegates,” added David Autry, another Disabled American Veterans official.

Autry said vets would’ve had to get up “at Oh-dark-30 and try to get breakfast and showered and get their prosthetics on.” Once inside, they “could not leave the meeting room, and the bathrooms are outside,” he said.

So the war heroes told the evil creep to eat shit and die, the end.

Injured vets tell pull Dick Cheney invitation over security demands [New York Daily News]

{ 53 comments }

queeraselvis v 2.0 July 28, 2008 at 2:01 pm

And we’re surprised by this how?

columnv July 28, 2008 at 2:01 pm

They’re just a bunch of winners suffering from mental maiming.

WIDTAP July 28, 2008 at 2:01 pm

They should invite Rummy instead. He understands that you don’t go to a convention with the disabled vets that you want. You go to a convention with the disabled vets that you have.

ManchuCandidate July 28, 2008 at 2:01 pm

Who the fuck does he think he is? The preznit? Oh right, he does.

Scarab July 28, 2008 at 2:04 pm

No problem, if the veterans are refusing to be used as photo props there is always the serving military who can be ordered into place. Failing that – convicts in uniform or PhotoShop. Really, this is no problem at all.

Spence July 28, 2008 at 2:05 pm

I clicked through on this story and at first all I got was a 404 message. Like I wasn’t already paranoid!

gjdodger July 28, 2008 at 2:06 pm

I’m surprised Darth Cheney didn’t threaten to shoot them in the face.

Hart88 July 28, 2008 at 2:07 pm

To make matter worse, Cheney also demanded that the holding room be stocked with massive amounts of coffee and bran muffins.

V572625694 July 28, 2008 at 2:09 pm

[re=45450]WIDTAP[/re]: Good one.

NoWireHangers July 28, 2008 at 2:11 pm

Well, at least he offered to speak. Barack was probably at the gym since he hates America so much.

Canuckledragger July 28, 2008 at 2:12 pm

Q: “But, Mr. Vice President, many of these veterans were horribly wounded and cannot endure having to go hours without medical attention and bathroom breaks.”

A: “So? They should have thought of that before they failed to get five deferments.”

freakishlystrong July 28, 2008 at 2:13 pm

SO?

AfghanVet July 28, 2008 at 2:15 pm

Ok, so Cheney’s paranoia is not what bothers me, it’s that the people running this organization are still under the delusion that anyone in the military wants to hear from these creeps. Bush and Cheney speak at military posts because the soldiers are basically ordered to attend and clap.

Serolf Divad July 28, 2008 at 2:16 pm

[re=45474]NoWireHangers[/re]:

Barack offered to speak, but only if the Vets could beat him in a game of basketball first. He was like “Come on, five against one. What have you got to be worried about? Pull up those wheelchairs and lets have at it!”

BadNewsJack July 28, 2008 at 2:17 pm

So, in a sense, they told him to go fuck himself. Ahhh, Payback, thy name is Bitch.

Delicious July 28, 2008 at 2:24 pm

I thought this was cute:

Cheney has visited hospitalized wounded warriors and invited Walter Reed Army Medical Center patients for fly-fishing lessons around his swimming pool.

“And that’s how you fly-fish. Now get the fuck outta here, losers.”

AngryBlakGuy July 28, 2008 at 2:24 pm

…just like Dick Cheney to crawl out of his undisclosed shit hole to insult Vets.

DieOnTheTurnpike July 28, 2008 at 2:25 pm

This does not bode well to discourage the fact that America is indeed a nation of whiners.

Cubilista July 28, 2008 at 2:26 pm

@Canuckledragger,

A: Or blown up

S.Luggo July 28, 2008 at 2:30 pm

“Cheney has visited hospitalized wounded warriors and invited Walter Reed Army Medical Center patients for fly-fishing lessons around his swimming pool.” Assuming they have hands.

SayItWithWookies July 28, 2008 at 2:31 pm

To be fair, the odds that a senior member of this administration will get beaten to death with a dozen or so vets weilding prosthetic limbs increases every day.

Hooray For Anything July 28, 2008 at 2:34 pm

Cheney wanted them kept in that locked room because it’s easier to suck their blood if they can’t escape.

Terry July 28, 2008 at 2:44 pm

Keep old guys from the bathroom? Geeze, the only worse Cheney could have done was try to raise the price of beer at the VFW or the Legion.

4everjung July 28, 2008 at 2:47 pm

Why is Cheney even bothering with giving lectures? With 6 months to go he should be spending time planning retirement, figuring out the COBRA thing, and getting even with everyone that did him wrong the last 8 years.

Cape Clod July 28, 2008 at 3:00 pm

Do you ever wonder if Cheney’s Secret Service detail might, perhaps, be a little less highly motivated than agents assigned to others?

warreno July 28, 2008 at 3:04 pm

[re=45530]SayItWithWookies[/re]: I would pay to see that. I would pay a lot.

slithytoves July 28, 2008 at 3:12 pm

Why does Dick Cheney hate America? I mean really, why?

madirishman July 28, 2008 at 3:20 pm

All kidding aside…my hat’s off to the vets who told Cheney to go to hell. Thank you for your service to your country, gentlemen–then and now.

In a truly just world, Cheney should have been locked in the room with you guys, while you whalloped his draft-dodging, chicken-hawk ass for two hours.

Lionel Hutz Esq. July 28, 2008 at 3:21 pm

Actually, what finally broke the deal was Cheney’s rider that demanded his green room be stocked with only red M&Ms and the blood of the innocent.

snig July 28, 2008 at 3:30 pm

[re=45599]Cape Clod[/re]: They can afford to be lax, only a stake through the heart can kill him. And his is so small it’s be almost impossible to find.

snig July 28, 2008 at 3:32 pm

[re=45470]Hart88[/re]: That’s really funny. He also probably demanded a fountain that prominently featured the sound of trickling water.

TGY July 28, 2008 at 3:38 pm

You sneer at him now, but as soon as he leaves office, Dick Cheney will be tying balloon dogs for children’s birthday parties while wearing a rubber nose and whiteface. He’ll release his inner clown.

georgia_peach July 28, 2008 at 3:41 pm

[re=45530]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Hopefully those that do will be awarded (additional?) Bronze Stars, or some similar sort of recognition. It would really be a public service. Oh, and HILARIOUS.

freakishlystrong July 28, 2008 at 3:48 pm

[re=45616]slithytoves[/re]: He hates us for our Freedoms…

sanantonerose July 28, 2008 at 3:48 pm

[re=45502]Delicious[/re]: Around his swimming pool? How…quaint. If they got thirsty, he probably just pushed their heads under.

sanantonerose July 28, 2008 at 3:50 pm

[re=45530]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Sounds like something that should be televised. Kind of like George Carlin’s “suicide channel.” Would it be pay-per-view or free?

lumpenprole July 28, 2008 at 3:52 pm

This is because he’s used to meeting new people through the extraordinary rendition program. The fact that he was going to let them wait unshackled with the lights on was his way of showing trust and respect.

Deepthroat July 28, 2008 at 4:03 pm

they’re easier to shoot when they can’t get out…

HedonismBot July 28, 2008 at 4:04 pm

I have seen the future – Cheney will die by spontaneous combustion. There is a lot of heat and pressure building up inside his black, shriveled, angry heart.

S.Luggo July 28, 2008 at 4:30 pm
Volumptuous July 28, 2008 at 4:49 pm

“fly-fishing lessons around his swimming pool.”

And water-boarding polo after lunch!

Fear of a Black Reagan July 28, 2008 at 5:06 pm

DAV has a convention? Who knew! I thought it was just the cheap bar with no windows where the wheelchair bitters get drunk! Cheney should be ashame killing their Natty Boh buzz.

nietzscheprojectile July 28, 2008 at 5:08 pm

[re=45667]TGY[/re]: Argh. No. No. No. Now all I can think of is the creepy Poltergeist clown.

Joey Ratz July 28, 2008 at 5:21 pm

These guys are obviously phony soldiers. Country Above Self was right!

Wagamuffin July 28, 2008 at 7:18 pm

My dad, a proud WWII Canadian war vet (’39-’45) is 88 years old, and owes his extended life-span to Michael Moore’s interplay with the Bush regime. Great for clearing glogged arteries and keeping the blood pumping.

It’s always nice to go over for a visit and see his renewed committment to outlive this administration. Mom says heartwarming and hopeful things like, “Your dad swore at CNN today!”.

God bless, Mr. Vice President…your good work around the globe gives my Dad the will to carry on, at least until the Novemeber ’08 election. He didn’t take shrapnel in his ass so that people like the ‘Wizard of Dick’ could lie THEIRS off.

llyn July 28, 2008 at 7:36 pm

[re=45569]4everjung[/re]: Cheney has no backlog of people to get even with. In fact he’s always all caught up on his list of people deserving of pre-emptive strikes. Takes care of both lists first thing every morning, even before his medications.

llyn July 28, 2008 at 7:42 pm

[re=45616]slithytoves[/re]: It’s not America he hates. Oh no, he loves America, for her mineral wealth, her taxpayer wealth to be transferred to himself. It’s Americans he hates. (Also, Canadians, Mexicans, South Americans, Europeans, Africans, Asians, Australians, Polynesians, etc., etc., etc. Did I miss anybody?)

The Incomparable Tiny Valdez July 28, 2008 at 7:51 pm

Solution: vodka. Not shots, IV.

Norbert July 28, 2008 at 11:39 pm

good news! the Iraq Veterans of Local Invasions has stepped up to the plate and is prepared to offer him an opportunity to visit with their group.

takes your breath away, doesn’t it? imagine mr. “I had better things to do” speaking to a room of wounded veterans.

did their rejection make it on the TV news anywhere? you know, just as an antidote to the fake hysteria of Obama not visiting the troops in Germany? just curious.

Oscar Folsom Cleveland July 29, 2008 at 1:34 am

Funny thing is, most of those vets probably voted for Cheney in 2000 *and* ’04….and will give it to McSame this time as well.

But good for them to say no to Darth’s daddy:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Darth_Vader#Darth_Vader_as_a_cultural_metaphor

Mahatma Froglegs July 29, 2008 at 2:06 am

[re=45599]Cape Clod[/re]: [re=45653]snig[/re]: Nope, the only way to kill this kind of vampire is to first immobilize it with a stake through the cash-grabbing hand. Then you bury it in a suit with the Union Label. Since those are as scarce as hen’s teeth these days, the horror shall never truly end.

Mahatma Froglegs July 29, 2008 at 2:10 am

Those ingrates just didn’t have the stamina to hear about the sweet new line of JDAM-Equipped prosthethics he plans to equip them all with. Their loss.

eyesfriedopen July 29, 2008 at 8:59 am

Of course the vets told Cheney to eat shit and die. That’s why we call them heroes.

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