Wonkette
With the exception of the two days following the conclusion of the Democratic primaries, when Hillary Clinton and all her dumb minions seemed to really push the whole “Hillary will be vice president or we will sabotage this whole election” idea, she has pretty much kept her head down, surfacing only occasionally to make another tacky request for money. But despite this display of sorta-team-player-ness, mean Barack Obama continues to state publicly and openly that there isn’t a snowball’s chance in hell she’ll get on the ticket with him. Witness the latest damning quotes, delivered on Meet the Press yesterday.
Obama told Tom Brokaw he would like the following qualities in a running mate:
- Integrity.
- Independence.
- Someone “who shares a vision of the country, where we need to go, that we’ve got to fundamentally change not only our policies, but how our politics works, how business is done in Washington.”
He might as well have just added, “Oh, and no pantsuits.” Hillary in ‘12!
Chances Dim for Clinton as Obama V.P. [New York Sun]
Well, he still said “him, or her” in referring to his choice. Who does that leave, hmm? Pelosi? My vote is for one of the Girls Next Door. Heff doesn’t need THREE, right?
Obviously Obama chose life. Who needs a female Iago behind them?
Except that he also said he wants someone “who’s willing to tell me where he thinks or she thinks I’m wrong.” Although, I think he meant privately.
Barry’s smart enough to know he should stay away from the gorgon queen witch Hillary. First chance she gets she’ll eat him and crown herself lord of the earth.
Well, what could he say, really?
I want a candidate with integrity. (Hillary’s out)
I want a candidate who is popular (Hillary’s out)
I want a candidate who inspires hope (Hillary’s out)
I want a candidate who is not a Washington insider (Hillary’s out)
I want a candidate with no connections to lobbyists (Hillary’s out)
I want a candidate who appeals to independents (Hillary’s out)
I want a candidate who won’t be constantly trying to figure out how to get me killed (Hillary’s out)
There’s something about this picture…is that a wee Islamist crescent I see just to right of Barry Hussein’s head? Subliminal messages! He is the Manchurian Candidate.
But to avoid hurt feelings, Barry will tell Hillz that she can be in charge of answering the phone at 3 a.m.
So it’s a win-win!
Barack Hussein Obama don’t need no stinking Vice President.
Uncle Al: Right, he could hall her the “Night Prez.”, and tell her it’s like Batman to his Superman.
Wait! The door is still open for Hillz.
He also said he was looking for a candidate with a really annoying cackle.
qualities in a running mate: Integrity. Independence. Vision.
Whatever happened to Faith, Hope and Charity. And the greatest of these being: Someone free of debts.
…he should have thrown in, “someone who doesnt owe Mark Penn’s fat, sloppy Jabba the Hut looking ass 10 million dollars”!
loudmouthredhead: Obama/Kendra 08
Godless Liberal *: See, I was gonna go with Holly. I mean, she practically runs the place right now. THAT’s administrative talent I can believe in!
I’m still holding out for Lara Logan. Who might also be a good VP pick, now that I think about it.
Obama said, “I want a candidate with a smaller dick than mine”, Hillary’s out.
It’s Bono. It’s definately Bono.
SayItWithWookies: He could appoint her as Secretary of Gettin’ It On.
But she’s worked SO HARD!!!
This is code for Ron Paul.
Whoever is doing the vetting might also inquire if the candidate’s spouse will be trying to rustle up cheeseburgers in the kitchen and shag the interns while the VP is in cabinet meetings.
Hopey doesn’t need to announce his pick for a while, and will likely do so only once it becomes clearer what he “needs” [not wants] in a Veep.
In the meantime, I remain fascinated by the PUMA non-phenom. Running in a dozen different directions [Hopey with nose plugged; McCain with nose plugged; Nader or Barr with nose plugged; Hilz write-in; sit on hands; et al] and powered by pure petulance, PUMA is about to host a convention to… um, I dunno, work out a common strategy, maybe?
Does anybody here actually have Clue One what this so-called movement hopes to achieve? Do they?
I think it’s well past time that Wonkette fixed its laser-like focus upon the PUMA losers. Cheetahs are more common; Cougars are way more horny; but I think PUMAs might be way funnier than even the Paultards. We can haz more PUMA coverage?
Obama is waiting for his veep pick to offer him $20 and a blow job. Which I think puts Larry Craig back in play.
Oh thank the mormn baby jesus.
Canuckledragger: I think we’re all hoping that if we ignore them they’ll go away. How about covering polar bears?
loudmouthredhead: Michelle.
Canuckledragger: Say what you will about PUMAs, but they make a darn fine running shoe.
eyesfriedopen: That’s true. It’s just too bad they can’t find a candydate to run in them.
‘I will also be seeking a Vice Presidential candidate who doesn’t repeatedly refer to the prospect of my being assassinated. I think that might be a given in a VP.’
No Hillary as veep — I think Bill and Hillary would be too valuable as the Fred and Ethel Mertz to Barry and Michelle’s Ricky and Lucy; the veep should be Bill Richardson, who has that sleepy Tom Poston thing down — I can see him nodding off in charmingly funny ways in the Senate, only to abruptly wake, bang the gavel and say, “Hey, keep it down!” When things get slow, Barry and Michelle can sic Bill R. on grouchy old Ralph Nader, perfectly cast in the Gale Gordon (Osgood Conklin) part. Ralph also will be a great Phineas T. Bluster to Barry’s African Howdy Doody.
Foolish mortals! Did you honestly think Darth Hillary would go quietly? Even now, her Hilltard Army gathers, waiting for her to give the word and send them forth, to lay siege to the Democratic fortress known as Denver.
Darth Hillary WILL be Hopey’s VP, or else she will use the power of the Dark Side to make her 13 million Hilltardz sit at home on Election Day, thus throwing the election to Walnuts, and plunging the Old Republic into darkness and senile confusion!
Democracy is for losers! Power is not given to you–you must TAKE it! Sssssshhh…hawwwww!
If only he required that his running mate “cries at the drop of the hat to get sympathy votes” she might still have a chance.
He should make her Secretary of Adequacy.
lawrenceofthedesert: Wow, so many references. The room is spinning. im getting dizzy.
In that picture, is he saying “Smell my finger!”??? Cuz if that was after meeting Teh Hilz, that just seems wrong…
Not_So_Much: He’s saying, “I want YOU…” Not sure why, but he can have whatever he wants from me.
I will say it once and for all; You heard it here first. Barry will appoint Hillz to the Supreme Court the second that Kennedy retires. Why not? She’s a good lawyer (according to Ken Starr) and wimmins won’t have to worry about their reproductive rights while Hill is in the house. Step up or no? Senate is only so gratifying at 65 when you had no higher ambitions. Hill/Ted: Discuss.