Wonkette
Ha, so get this. John McCain and pals very recently came up with the MEDIA PLOY OF THE CENTURY: they were going to Take The Media Back from Barack Obama during his big speech in Berlin tomorrow, which at least 400 million people will attend (hurrah), by speaking from an oil rig off the coast of Louisiana. Surely all reporters and cameramen would’ve rushed to cover this instead, because what’s a better venue for a media grab than some tiny offshore piece of metal that’s only reachable by helicopter? But now, after publicizing this brilliant coup, McCain has had to cancel it because of, whatitscalled, THE MONSTROUS HURRICANE THAT IS DESTROYING EVERYTHING IN THE GULF.
While McCain don’t give no guff about some evil hurricane, reporters are known to be whiny sallies and that’s why the “trip” had to be canceled, immediately after being announced:
UPDATE: Just over an hour after finalizing plans to visit an oil rig tomorrow, the McCain campaign has canceled the visit.
“The meeting with Governor Jindal has been postponed and we are cancelling the trip to the rig due to weather,” said spokesman MIchael Goldfarb.
McCain will now fly from Pennsylvania to Ohio. He had originally planned to fly tonight from Pennsylvania to New Orleans to be staged there for morning departure to the rig.
What the hell is going on with this terrible, incompetent campaign? Either they literally fucked up and had no idea that the hurricane would PROBABLY get in the way, or they announced the idea with the knowledge that they’d cancel it later — just to get attention for a few minutes. Does anyone on this campaign know of a world beyond the next four hours? Do they remember that the point of all this is to win an election in November?
McCain to counterprogram Obama in Germany with visit to Gulf Coast oil rig [Jonathan Martin]
Obviously, this is a ploy of the weather because the weather has a natural biased towards Barack HUSSAIN Obama, and we’re not going to stand for it, now ‘er ever. Dammit.
Umm dipwad McGiligutty thinks that Prez Bush has caused the drop in oil prices (http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080723/ap_on_el_pr/mccain, so I gotta think, no; nobody in the McCain camp could find their own ass with both hands.
WALNUTS is aware of this “weather” you speak of.
I support offshore pandering.
John McCain is aware of hurricanes.
An oil rig is a helluva place for Jindal to choose for accepting McCain’s proposal. Wonder what’s in the prenup…
McCain is a Goldfish.
http://www.thecharacterbox.com/images/Original/goldfish.jpg
After his last three “movies,” do we really want M. Night Shyamalan in the white house?
Just sayin’….
Truly a shame. What a magnificent photo op that would have been, WALNUTS! standing at the prow of a decrepit tug boat chugging it’s way through an oil slick on the way to some filthy rig.
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,389307,00.html
Uh, that’s a reply to this:ForTheTurnstiles:
Dammit!
Toldja so.
And this just occurred to me: If Louisiana has so much oil, how come they’re so damn poor? They’re like the Nigeria of America.
So now Mother Nature has a liberal bias?
Jesus, whaaaaa! Look at me!
A magnificent opportunity to yell at clouds, missed.
Will Bob Novak please run this old man over and put him out of his misery?
So is there going to be a “pick a song to describe the weather’s LOVE of Obama” contest on McBush’s website soon?
Let’s try to be understanding here… We’ve already seen that Republicans have difficulty gauging the strength of hurricanes.
Walnuts is working hard and hopes that sometime next month, he’ll know how to “get on” the Internet all by himself, and maybe next year he’ll know how to “dial up” the weather report, and then this kind of thing won’t happen. Yay!
I take it as a sign that even Mother Nature and Jesus are voting for Obama this year.
I can see the headline now:
McCAIN CALLS HURRICANE DOLLY A “CUNT” FOR FORCING CANCELLATION OF DESPERATE CAMPAIGN EVENT
Or is that too wordy?
Anyone in the Texas area a McCain Aces paper airplane would’ve known there was a hurricane coming.
Jeebus — it’s like the people around him don’t even want him to win….
Damn librul hurricanes!
If McCain had balls he would’ve planned to hand-glide from his 737-400 onto that oil patform. But no..he was gonna take a chopper. Pussy.
No pussy for prez.
No p u s s e y for prez.
‘Cause ’cause ’cause I remember when a we used to fly
from the sky to the flat-top,
Oba obaserving the ‘ypocrites - yeah! -
Mingle with da mission people we meet, yeah!
Good friends we have, oh, good friends we bussed
Along the way, yeah!
In this great future, you can’t forget your past;
So dry your tears, I seh. Yeah!
No pussy for prez.
No p u s s e y for prez.
This is the obvious result of a campaign that has no knowledge of the Internet and its ability to forecast weather outside the city you are currently in. Unfortunately, this also ruins McCain’s alibi for the Ron Paul assassination attempt cleverly disguised as a hurricane.
You mean Brownie wasn’t available to fix this?
NotUrEvryDayWEzl: Are you sure you didn’t mean Lieberman?
Striking resemblance!
Tha..thaat’s not forecasting you can believe in.
Had WALNUTS! been trapped on an oil rig in the middle of a hurricane, maybe, just maybe he would have made the rest of us give a fuck. Or at least have a good laugh.
He’s like the older child everyone forgets exists once the baby is born.
catsquatch: Steamboat WALNUTS braves the big storm!
“That, my friends, is why we need more off-shore drilling.”
loquaciousmusic: Too wordy. How bout: MCCAIN TO DOLLY: YOU CUNT.
Hey, Alabama has lots of oil rigs and a stupid Republican governor too. It could be us, but nooooo….
Its the liberal conspiracy at work again.
loquaciousmusic: Of course he has to cancel the event — not because the hurricane makes it too dangerous to land on an oil rig, but because he’s got to run off and pretend to play a guitar somewhere.
I think this whole McCain campaign is being orchestrated by the folks at wonkette.com. This really can’t be real. It’s all an illusion and I hope to wake up shortly and read the news about President Eisenhower enjoying his stay at Camp David.
Presumably the McCain camp didn’t know about Dolly because they’ve stopped watching the news - all the Obama coverage was making them depressed.
McCain / Head-in-the-sand 08!
But that’s not change (of venue) we can believe in.
Uncle Al: Um, but growing up in Florida, we knew when hurricanes were coming and this was before the internets. Or the Weather Channel, even. Had to know when to buy the plywood, you know. So either WALNUTS isn’t aware of the teevee, or his campaign staff really is just playing it for laughs at this point.
NO! It was the Chinesez!! Remember how they control the weather?
cal: “librul hurricanes” make sense because when they come ashore, you can be assured that the Republican administration will retaliate by not sending in any help afterward. Such a brave administration we have.
iwillsavethispatient: Come to think of it, there’s probably one other thing on tv news that depresses the McCain team - the McCain coverage.
He coulda had the phony press conference here in Alabama. We’ve got nice weather at the onshore rigs and we’ve got a stupid Republican governor too. But noooo….
Damn lieral hurricanes…
Dr. Tobias Funke: Niiice. haha
I don’t know which is funnier: this story about McCain or the one about Novak’s hit n run. Either way, I’m in STITCHES.
So the stupid hurricane foiled McCain’s latest plan. Not to worry, they have a better plan. Visit Berlin tomorrow 3 times! That’s Berlin, NH and Berlin, PA and Berlin, WI.
http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2008/07/23/mccain-message-to-hit-berlin-thursday/
Who’s Kevin Costner endorsing? Cause this shit’s got water world written all over it.
I thought the event was cancelled because of the oil spill in New Orleans:
http://southernstudies.org/facingsouth/2008/07/oil-spill-near-new-orleans-underscores.asp
Drill here, drill now! (if you know what I mean)
“GET OFF MY LAWN! ER, WHAT? DARN KIDS, WITH THEIR HURRICANES!”
Beef Supreme: Excellent plan. There’s a good bakery on 49 right near the center of town in Berlin, WI (or at least there was ten years ago), and then after that, it’s a short drive to the Lands’ End Outlet store where McCain can pick up some nice slacks. After that, it’s off to the fish fry, and he should be in bed by 9.
Bandito: i think youre probably at least half right…he was supposed to stop in New Orleans first, meet with Bobby Jindal and then head to the oil rig…
too bad though…the smell of 400,000 gallons of diesel fuel wafting through the air…not to mention the oil sheen on the river… would have provided the perfect backdrop to McCains little off shore drilling pep rally…
the article says theyve closed 29 miles of the river…locally, were hearing its more like 60 miles….and yes, it does smell…
people on the west bank have been asked to conserve water as their intake from the river is contaminated…
ForTheTurnstiles: Not having to lose the election with him.
Apparently you do need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows.
SDS! Days of Rage!
Outstando: WIN 4EVAH
I always feel so subversive with I go to this site.
I don’t see why they can’t go anyway. Pussys.
Quacker: That’s not fair to M. Night. He may be a hack, but he’s a cute hack. Bobby Jindal, not so much. I think he’s homely.
anabellum: Ugh. By the time it gets to New Orleans, the Mighty Mississippi is already quite…ripe. The addition of all that oil must be downright nasty.
And to get serious for the nonce, how bad is it to have the last 30 miles of our largest waterway blocked off? It’s the equivalent of a pile-up on I-40, only with no exits. Plenty of stuff still moves by barge, even today. It can’t be good.
so the humor is… there’s a hurricane in the Gulf of Mexico?
wow
Hamletta, believe me, and I live 10 blocks from the river in NOLA-it stunk this morning-normally it’s just a big, wide, fast moving river. This morning? Peeuuuu! That thing is mess. 50 miles of it. Whole port is shut down for a few days, maybe a week. It’s a shame that Walnuts didn’t show up and take Gubner Bobby out for a ride to a rig. They could have talked about the safety of drilling and the wonderous record of the oil companies, while, in the background, a giant, burbling sheen of #6 bunker fuel came rolling out of Southwest Pass. It would have made for quite the photo op. Besides, we were all kinda hoping he would pick Bobby Boy for VP, but, of course, that would put another Dem in the Governors Mansion and they ain’t doing that. No way, no how.
SayItWithWookies: Louisiana is the Nigeria of America, but don’t forget that America is the Zimbabwe of America right now.
All that offshore oil revenue flows straight to the Fed treasury. And the MMS has been undercharging royalties for a generation. So, in their defense, it’s not just Louisiana’s fault.