Ron Paul Writing Important Memoir

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So has any candidate from either party come away from this presidential election with more than Ron Paul? Many dumb failures from Congress run every four years and then, after losing terribly, slink back to whichever invisible subcommittee it is that lets them hold the #3 ranking based on seniority, sure. But did Chris Dodd score lucrative book deals after his quite pointless campaign? No. Ron Paul’s failed campaign, on the other hand, brainwashed just enough hobos to guarantee that he can write multimillion dollar bestsellers, about ANYTHING, for the rest of his life. Earlier this year his book Revolution: A Manifesto, became a #1 New York Times bestseller. And now he’s signed up for an Important Follow-up, the comical title of which will be Revolution: A Memoir, about the psychological import of his early masturbatory experimentation. [New York Observer]

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Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined Wonkette.com in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

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23 comments

  1. Sean O

    Wow, this is one heck of a strategy for success:

    1). Get elected from some insane corner of the country.
    2). Hold radical, nutjob ideals that appeal to Dungeons and Dragons fans. Melodrama is important.
    3). Spout said ideals on the interwebs.
    4). Write books about how important you and your insane followers are.

    Brilliant. My book “Filipinos are trying to kill you” hits newstands in August.

  2. loquaciousmusic

    The same people who jerk off to Ron Paul probably jerk off to Ru Paul.

    Turn to the right, indeed.

  3. Sean O

    [re=41644]pondscum[/re]: I think I’ll try to find some place in Swampville, Louisiana. Then I can say the Filipinos caused the hurricanes due to, like, aliens or witchcraft or something.

  4. Fata Morgana

    I can see the remainder shelves at Barnes and Noble now:

    Revolution: Special Prune Danish Edition
    Revolution: The Musical (Forward by Mylee Cyrus)
    Revolution Rap : It’s Hard Out Here For A Pimp (with Andy Rooney)

    and finally

    Revolution In My Pants: Sex and the Single Non-Statist (including four-color plates!)

  5. FunkyPalmettoBug

    “how to scam World of Warcraft users of their Mountain Dew and pot money”

  6. pondscum

    [re=41652]Sean O[/re]: Louisiana and witchcraft are an excellent combo. Best of luck! Keep us posted.

  7. Fata Morgana

    [re=41661]Marcel Parcells[/re]:

    “You roll a 15, just barely enough to hit the slavering, supressive Wonktard for 13 points, killing him and rescuing the fair, fat-bottomed princess!”

  8. weirdiowasculpture

    I’d buy the book, only I’d have to spend damnable fiat money to buy it, which would only encourage the bastards.

  9. loquaciousmusic

    [re=41657]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Yeah, and one of my balls hangs lower than the other…FOR LIBERTY.

  10. FunkyPalmettoBug

    [re=41736]ronaldpagan[/re]: Free market floor action on a rider in Ron Paul’s pants?

  11. Darehead

    [re=41736]ronaldpagan[/re]:He’s supposed to reveal his enKKKounters with major political figures over the last thirty years, ya know, his best pals like David Duke and Don Black, and I’d reckon the 3 of them would have some steamy tales to share, if only all of their Village People gear could speak!!!

  12. shortsshortsshorts

    You know, it didn’t take him very long to write the memoir, when his Revolution was just a couple dozen months ago… It apparently wasn’t a very long rEVOLution.

  13. SayItWithWookies

    [re=41814]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: Ron Paul just happens to be the Bob Woodward of the Ron Paul r3VOLution. In addition, of course, to the George Washington, the Thomas Jefferson, the Abraham Lincoln and the Rosa Parks of the Ron Paul r3VOLution.

  14. Everyday Joe

    Some things I cannot understand. I am no D&D player, I dont Warcraft, I am a middle aged independent voter. I have been tired for many years of the lack of choices in the GOP or DNC for years and have always voted the ‘lesser of 2 evils’. Then someone came along with “radical ideas” like, cutting wasteful spending, respecting the Constitution, respecting civil liberties, eliminating wasteful and unproductive departments, and creating a solid and dependable commodity based currency to eliminate the need for the current unbacked currency which is killing our economy now (See Big 3 Auto Bailout, Bear and Stearns, AIG, Fannie Mae, Freddie Mac, and the endless bank closings.

    So despite these “radical views” I choose to support this “unknown” (20 years in Congress but unknown).

    And somehow voting for a true “unknown” (Obama) with no record and no experience is universally accepted, while Ron Paul is ridiculed.

    I am sure I will be written off as some “kook”, but I can say this; I have done my research. I do not take everything I am told at face value, I do the research to find out myself. I research both sides and come to a reasonable and logical conclusion. Can each of you say the same, or do you read a news article by a biased ‘right wing’ or ‘left wing’ newspaper or TV Station and call yourself an expert? Who is more of a fool? Take the time to learn for yourself, and stop taking everyones word.

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