HA HA HA HA HA HA  12:40 pm July 22, 2008

John McCain Complains About Media Love For Another Candidate With Gay Song Contest

by Jim Newell

Sweet criminy, did Juan McCain send out a hot e-mail this morning or what: “It’s pretty obvious that the media has a bizarre fascination with Barack Obama. Some may even say it’s a love affair. We want you to be the judge. We’ve compiled two videos of the more outrageous moments of this not so secret love affair.” Indeed, it’s very similar to the “secret love affairs” that John McCain had during his first marriage, and more recently too, and also with the media.

They are having a video contest — a contest between videos of Media Love For Obama — and it’s, hmm, the most secretly gay thing of… today! So far. The videos each compile clips from MSNBC and other networks of Chris Matthews saying he likes, who is it again, oh right, Obama. How does John McCain have the courage to wake up any given morning, knowing that Chris Matthews will his support his opponent at some time during the day?

Hey, wasn’t the McCain campaign not going to bitch about the media’s interest in the young, inspiring, unknown first Muslim candidate over him? That was a good strategy, we thought. If the media didn’t already have the biggest boner for John McCain, and actually decided to look at him objectively, they could pretty much destroy any chance of him winning in a few 2-hour news cycles. The media are blatant whores for each of these candidates — one because of white guilt, another because he gives them lollipops on his bus.

Hey Barack Wanna 69? [John McCain]

 
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{ 64 comments }

Gopherit v2.0 July 22, 2008 at 12:45 pm

Why not “To Young to Fall in Love” by Motley Crue?

El Bombastico July 22, 2008 at 12:45 pm

So stupid. Keep prodding the beast, John… we’ll see how many first-wife and vicodin stories pop up in the next two weeks.

Serolf Divad July 22, 2008 at 12:48 pm

OMFG, John McCain… fire your ad guys RIGHT NOW!

Seriously, this ad makes me want to pull the lever for Obama almost as much as the “Yes We Can” video.

bernadette July 22, 2008 at 12:49 pm

Thanks for taking my tip Wonkette. I couldn’t help but laugh so hard I spilled my coffee this morning.

RuperttheBear July 22, 2008 at 12:50 pm

HA HA HA HA HA. I bet McCain will get a big laugh over this at his next barbecue.

Squiggyfm July 22, 2008 at 12:50 pm

Of course! Bring up the fact that everyone loves your opponent. There’s no WAY this’ll backfire.

Kudos Johnny.

Serolf Divad July 22, 2008 at 12:50 pm

By the way, here’s a good Love Song For John McCain.

NoWireHangers July 22, 2008 at 12:51 pm

“I won’t be IGNORED, Media”

EnBuenOra July 22, 2008 at 12:51 pm

You know, McCain always took the media for granted. Sure, he fed them BBQ, gave them dry rubs (?), let them sit in cute areas on his bus, invited them out to various of his many houses, told salty stories and off-color jokes…

…but after a while they could tell he was just using them, manipulating their almost worshipful love for him just for his raging electoral needs.

It’s hardly surprising that the media might begin to cast their eyes elsewhere, and John McCain being the hateful, jealous creep he is, is this close from screaming at the media in public that they’re some c*nts painted up like trollopes!

SuperRounder July 22, 2008 at 12:53 pm

How about “Take A Chance on Me” by ABBA? WALNUTS will cream his depends when he hears that.

irisheyes July 22, 2008 at 12:53 pm

Oh My God These Fucktards Make Me Crazy. It’s like watching a campaign being run by chipmunks. With Down’s Syndrome. Who thought it was a GOOD idea to plaster the face of the OPPONENT all of the front page of the website?! And then..and then, to play compilations of laudatory comments about said opponent. This twitchy little ferret proves himself to be even more incompetent with each news cycle. It’s stunning, really. I am so very tired.

Paultardville July 22, 2008 at 12:53 pm

Totally in the tank, just ask The New Yorker.

tunamelt July 22, 2008 at 12:54 pm

This is the pot calling the kettle black.

Tawmn July 22, 2008 at 12:54 pm

Okay, McCain is clearly gay for Obama… I don’t even see the strategy here. WTF?

GlennBecksTaint July 22, 2008 at 12:54 pm

and Mitt Romney weeps with envy

SayItWithWookies July 22, 2008 at 12:56 pm

It’s no wonder they’re picking on McCain over little issues like his inability to tell whether Iran is majority Sunni or Shiite, or the fact that he knows nothing about economics, or that he thinks we should stay in Iraq even if Maliki and a majority of Iraqis want us to leave — can’t we talk about the important stuff, like who wears a flag pin?

RuperttheBear July 22, 2008 at 12:57 pm

[re=41183]EnBuenOra[/re]: That comment started off like a semi-serious trollster, then morphed into a useful observation, and closed with “c*nts painted up like trollopes.” It gave me the thrills of well-played misdirection, a Wonketteer sleight of hand. Bravo!

PioBaroja July 22, 2008 at 12:58 pm

[re=41187]tunamelt[/re]: That’s not racial transcendence!

user-of-owls July 22, 2008 at 12:59 pm

[re=41187]tunamelt[/re]: That’s not transcendence we can belieeeeve in!

user-of-owls July 22, 2008 at 1:00 pm

[re=41193]PioBaroja[/re]: oh, poo…damn stubby fingers.

ManchuCandidate July 22, 2008 at 1:00 pm

John McCain’s You Oughta Know

I want you to know, that I’m happy for you
I wish nothing but the best for you both
A blacker version of me
Does he make sauce like me
Would he let you ride on his campaign bus
Does he speak eloquently
And would he make your babies
I’m sure he’d make a really good president

Cause the love that you gave that we made wasn’t able
To make it enough for you to be on my side, no
And every time you speak his name
Does he know how you told me you’d sell me
Until you died, till you died
But you’re still alive

And I’m here to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It’s not fair to deny me
Of the sauce I made that I made for you
You, you, you oughta know

You seem very well, things look peaceful
I’m not quite so young, I thought you should know
Did you forget about me Mr. MSM
I hate to bug you in the middle of flying
It was a slap in the face how quickly I was replaced
Are you thinking of me when you love him

Cause the love that you gave that we made wasn’t able
To make it enough for you to be on my side, no
And every time you speak his name
Does he know how you told me you’d sell me
Until you died, till you died
But you’re still alive

And I’m here to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It’s not fair to deny me
Of the sauce I made that I made for you
You, you, you oughta know

Cause the joke that you put to sleep that was me
And I’m not gonna fade
As soon as you close your eyes and you know it
And every time I run my tongue up Faux Newz Net’s veiny dick
I hope you feel it…well can you feel it

And I’m here to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It’s not fair to deny me
Of the sauce I made that I made for you
You, you, you oughta know

irisheyes July 22, 2008 at 1:01 pm

Okay, the least we can do is vote: early and often. Let’s pick one version and just keep voting. Let the Old Man think people actually give a shit. I mean, it might be the only contest in which he sees a win.

Terry July 22, 2008 at 1:04 pm

Translation of that website:

“Wahhhh! I left the country, too, and nobody cared! All those mean media guys do is show pictures of him! This whole election, it’s just a popularity contest! I wanna be president!”

See: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Veruca_salt

pierce bottoms July 22, 2008 at 1:04 pm

when they kiss john’s ass it is because of that ‘straight talk.’ when they fawn over obama, it is because they have caught teh gay.

Doglessliberal July 22, 2008 at 1:08 pm

Jungle Love, of course.

Texan Bulldoggette July 22, 2008 at 1:10 pm

Well, now he knows how Mrs. McCain #1 felt when he left her for a new, fresh (albeit filthy rich) face. Also, I wonder if McMaverick knows about ASCAP (older than “the Google”)–those people get pissed off if you use their songs without permission.

loquaciousmusic July 22, 2008 at 1:11 pm

“I Touch Myself” would be Obama’s new campaign song, if I had anything to do with it.

NoWireHangers July 22, 2008 at 1:11 pm

[re=41196]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Yeah, you win, but would Barry go down on the Media in the Straight Talk Express, because WALNUTS! totally would.

tunamelt July 22, 2008 at 1:13 pm

[re=41201]Doglessliberal[/re]: Fever, Jungle Fever.

magic titty July 22, 2008 at 1:16 pm

Is his new song “I Know It’s Over” by The Smiths?
Does it signify the end of this bummer of a campaign?

“Oh mother, I can feel the soil falling over my head…”

Doglessliberal July 22, 2008 at 1:18 pm

[re=41207]tunamelt[/re]: I was thinking of this, for the monkey sounds theme:

http://video.yahoo.com/watch/18967/1095856

topshelfdogfood July 22, 2008 at 1:19 pm

McCain should go with some classic Journey.

Who’s whining now?

accidental_tourist July 22, 2008 at 1:20 pm

McCain is a conceited bastard, for sure. That’s why the younger, better looking, more financially savvy Mitt Romney of the glorious good hair can kiss any VP delusions goodbye. Looks like it’s gonna be Bobby Jindal after all. Or a really good lookin’ woman to teach that cunt trollop Cindy a lesson!

tunamelt July 22, 2008 at 1:22 pm

[re=41217]Doglessliberal[/re]: Oh, okay. I was thinking of this.

Scarab July 22, 2008 at 1:27 pm

Neil Young’s ‘Old Man’?

Schadenfried July 22, 2008 at 1:31 pm

[re=41180]Squiggyfm[/re]: Jusk ask Hillary…

trh July 22, 2008 at 1:31 pm

[re=41177]bernadette[/re]: Sent this in as well. Really was a great opening to my mailbox this morning. Normally I delete them, but something about the subject, “The media is in love.” just caught my eye.

Schadenfried July 22, 2008 at 1:32 pm

[re=41204]loquaciousmusic[/re]: I think “Do it ‘Til You’re Satisfied” would also be a good choice.

Doglessliberal July 22, 2008 at 1:35 pm

[re=41230]tunamelt[/re]: either will work!

Big Al1317 July 22, 2008 at 1:37 pm

Hey McLame, here’s a line from a song from the Fugs first album:

My baby done left me.
She’s gone to the movies with another guy.
And I feel like home made shit.

PrairiePossum July 22, 2008 at 1:54 pm

Hey Johnny, I have a theme song for you…

“Your Flag Decal Won’t Get You Into Heaven” by John Prine

But, your flag decal won’t get you
Into Heaven anymore.
They’re already overcrowded
From your dirty little war
Now Jesus don’t like Killin’
No matter what the reasons for.
And your flag decal won’t get you into Heaven anymore.

pierce bottoms July 22, 2008 at 1:55 pm

[re=41253]Big Al1317[/re]: i believe he courted cindy to the tune of ‘coca cola douche’

Darehead July 22, 2008 at 1:58 pm

Sheesh, McCain, have you been infiltrated with Paultards?
The media ARE in love with Barack Obama.

gjdodger July 22, 2008 at 2:02 pm

I’ve got one for you, McAncient: “Here’s a Quarter–Call Someone Who Cares.”

sanantonerose July 22, 2008 at 2:04 pm

Why do you build me up
Buttercup baby
Just to let me down…

sanantonerose July 22, 2008 at 2:06 pm

[re=41284]gjdodger[/re]: Ouch. Travis Tritt. Nice.

weirdiowasculpture July 22, 2008 at 2:11 pm

What McCain needs is Karl Rove and Dick Cheney in blackface minstrel outfits singing “In De Ebenin’ By De Moonlight.” This would secretly remind the media that Obama is black, and poof!– there goes the love affair.

PioBaroja July 22, 2008 at 2:27 pm

Chocolate City
Uh, what’s happening CC?
They still call it the White House
But that’s a temporary condition, too.
Can you dig it, CC?

To each his reach
And if I don’t cop, it ain’t mine to have
But I’ll be reachin’ for ya
‘Cause I love ya, CC.
Right on.

Lazy Media July 22, 2008 at 2:32 pm

[re=41191]SayItWithWookies[/re]: OBAMA wears the flag pin now. McCain, not so much. I swear to God, McCain has been sandbagging for eight years, pretending to suck up to Bush, just to see a liberal Democrat come in and erase Bush’s legacy in six months.

shortsshortsshorts July 22, 2008 at 2:38 pm

[re=41191]SayItWithWookies[/re]: NO no, those are just informalities. It’s all about empty statements and meaningless back stabbing. Not “issues” or “assfucking,” as it should be.

el_chupacabra July 22, 2008 at 2:38 pm

Tucker Carlson speaks for me.

AxmxZ July 22, 2008 at 2:44 pm

The McCain operative who came up with the brilliant idea of subliminally flooding the voters’ synapses with “Love” and “Barack” is clearly in David Axelrod’s pay.

AxmxZ July 22, 2008 at 2:49 pm

There’s only one real song deserving of winning this contest: Carla Bruni’s “Le Plus Beau de Quartier.” Not only is it perfect for Obama, but it’s in elitist French!

bernadette July 22, 2008 at 2:51 pm

[re=41246]trh[/re]: I got this sent through an Obama list-serve. I guess someone in the group subscribes to McCain’s new ventures and schemes, mainly for comic relief. Does the trick.

bernadette July 22, 2008 at 2:52 pm

[re=41277]Darehead[/re]: As a professional journalist I praise you.

Aurelio July 22, 2008 at 3:03 pm

The Daily Show made the same point as the McCain ad in its ‘Barack Oboner’ bit here:
http://rawstory.com//news/2008/Daily_Show_reporter_Obama_gives_me_0722.html

uncletravelingmatt July 22, 2008 at 3:24 pm

Vietnow.

TGY July 22, 2008 at 3:42 pm

Wait, isn’t Barry a crypto-terrorist-muskrat?

Muskrat Loooooooooove!

trh July 22, 2008 at 3:47 pm

[re=41371]bernadette[/re]: Same reason I subscribe :)

columnv July 22, 2008 at 3:52 pm

[re=41176]Serolf Divad[/re]: I agree. Who watches that and goes, “Man, Barry sucks.”

bernadette July 22, 2008 at 5:12 pm

In a recent poll, 77% of the voters (who were all women) said they’d rather make out with hot, scrumptious, Barack Obama. My question is, what the hell are those otehr 23% thinking? I’m sorry… hot, young, sexy Barack…. or Walnuts?

Sabre_Justice July 22, 2008 at 6:45 pm

These guys never get the backlash they deserve.

Oscar Folsom Cleveland July 22, 2008 at 7:15 pm

I love it…Whitey uses soul music to poke fun at sourpuss Abraham Osama bin Bama, king of Afghanistan and Irak. Why not?

Personally, I get a shiver up my leg every time Tweety Bird swoons over Barry’s long, lean, muscular, uh, personality…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3m9Gbb6NSwM

The Incomparable Tiny Valdez July 22, 2008 at 8:38 pm

“To Sir With Love”.

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