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WE ARE SHALLOW

Washington Post’s Anne Kornblut Is Funny, Hot

Even prettier than Dana Milbank, if you can imagine such a thing.It’s time for our weekly feature about funny Washington Post reporters who also photograph well. (This is the first and last installment.) Meet Anne “E.” Kornblut, WaPo national politics ace reporter. On that washingtonpost.com chat thing yesterday, she admitted to writing some kind of hilarious fake Bush acceptance speech poem, typed “LOL” in response to a Jesse Helms joke, and said this about Hillary maybe trying to still get the nomination: “She really does seem to have moved on in my view. Her supporters are another matter.” [Washington Post/Fishbowl DC]


1:22 PM on Fri July 18 2008
By Ken Layne
2037 Views

  1. I’d do her.

  2. InsidiousTuna says at 1:29 pm, July 18th, 2008

    That’s so true! We are shallow!

    Four Whore Diamonds.

  3. MoodProcessor says at 1:30 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Her eyes are crooked.

  4. MoodProcessor says at 1:32 pm, July 18th, 2008

    KevoTron: I’m with you. Take a piece of paper and hold it over alternating sides of her face. She’s got some kind of Harvey Dent thing going on there. Seriously, the Librarian and the Dominatrix have found a way to assume the same point in space-time.

  5. Guppy06 says at 1:36 pm, July 18th, 2008

    MoodProcessor: “Seriously, the Librarian and the Dominatrix have found a way to assume the same point in space-time.”

    And this is a problem?

  6. MoodProcessor says at 1:36 pm, July 18th, 2008

    “Let’s get together after work. I’ll show you my Dewey Decimal.”

  7. Joey Ratz says at 1:39 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Hot + funny = win!

    Agreed, Ken.

  8. Monsieur Grumpe says at 1:40 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Kornblut? Sounds like a name from a John waters movie.

  9. Bypartizoa says at 1:42 pm, July 18th, 2008

    heh…heh…”Kornblut”

  10. Vewol Mevemont says at 1:43 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Tina Fey and I will have a threesome with this woman.

  11. tsunami says at 1:44 pm, July 18th, 2008

    kudzu:
    pithy. well put. exactly right.

    i wouldn’t want to talk to her…but i’d do her.

  12. MoodProcessor says at 1:50 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Guppy06:
    No Problem At All!
    I’d be naughty, and try to check out the refernce books!

  13. Guppy06 says at 1:51 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Her use of the acronym “LOL” qualifies her for a cushy job in the Detroit government!

  14. Botswana Meat Commission FC says at 1:53 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Hot? Don’t you live in Southern California, Layne?

  15. RuperttheBear says at 1:55 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Anne E. Kornblut: I am no gambler, but I think the odds are a lot, lot longer than that

    INSERT REJOINDER HERE

  16. Quacker says at 1:57 pm, July 18th, 2008

    I’d hit that, no matter which gender it turned out to be.

  17. Seanibus says at 1:59 pm, July 18th, 2008

    When Anne covered Capitol Hill for the Boston Globe, she could melt all the boys into small puddles just by putting on those little glasses she wears. I had a colleague who was regularly reduced to incoherence, at least more incoherence than usual, whenever Anne walked through the Senate Press Gallery.

  18. Rowr. With more posts like this one, I could cut back on the donkey porn.

  19. PoliticalGraffiti says at 2:08 pm, July 18th, 2008

    she used “LOL”. i bet she says “BJ” instead blow job too…ugh

  20. donner_froh says at 2:16 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Smart, hot, likes to drink (or so it seems from this picture)

    http://photos.imageevent.com/deltaforce/kornblut/websize/WHCAper20061.jpg

  21. graceless says at 2:34 pm, July 18th, 2008

    If HRC had moved on, she would have released her delegates.

  22. S.Luggo says at 2:38 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Her Q&A chat was the intellectual equivalent of valium. Just another DC hack.

  23. Sara K. Smith says at 2:49 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Oh hey are a bunch of comments deleted? Yes, and that is because you are all fucking cretins.

  24. Political Addict says at 3:12 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Dana Priest of the Post is much hotter, both physically and intellectually. (I think Kornblut looks a bit weird.) Here’s a pic of Priest. http://www.pbs.org/weta/washingtonweek/aroundthetable/priest.html

    And Priest does have a sense of humor. Further, I have to agree — Kornblut is not a good reporter. I think she’s pretty biased.

    Plus think about the fun you could have with her name (sadly, she’s married, but it’s her maiden name.) Like — “Mom, I’m going to get married to a Priest.”

  25. S.Luggo says at 3:16 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Sara K. Smith: Elitist.

  26. northernobserver says at 3:17 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Anne Kornblut is also notable for being the third point of a love triangle - her husband left her for Savannah Guthrie now of NBC, then of CourtTV

  27. S.Luggo says at 3:22 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Political Addict: Your link omitted Priest’s reporting on the Walter Reed scandal and on Black Ops secret prisons.

    Priest makes Kornblut sound like a fashion reporter.

  28. magic titty says at 3:24 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Sara K. Smith: Boo. Hiss.

  29. Guppy06 says at 3:25 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Sara K. Smith: I, for one, welcome our new copulating, cretinous overlords!

  30. Bandito says at 3:40 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Kornblut is funny. She’s the original author of the classic poem made up of Bush quotes, “Make the Pie Higher”:

    I think we all agree, the past is over.
    This is still a dangerous world.
    It’s a world of madmen
    And uncertainty
    And potential mental losses.

    Rarely is the question asked
    Is our children learning?
    Will the highways of the Internet
    Become more few?
    How many hands have I shaked?

    They misunderestimate me.
    I am a pit bull on the pant leg of opportunity.
    I know that the human being and the fish
    Can coexist.

    Families is where our nation finds hope
    Where our wings take dream.
    Put food on your family!
    Knock down the tollbooth!
    Vulcanize society!
    Make the pie higher!
    Make the pie higher!

  31. JamesMichaelCurley says at 3:41 pm, July 18th, 2008

    graceless: I just spoke with a Clinton delegate on Sunday. Bitter, bitter, bitter; but hitting everyone up for ‘donations’ to attend the convention.

  32. Delicious says at 3:42 pm, July 18th, 2008

    I’d hit David Broder.

  33. Lana Bang says at 3:52 pm, July 18th, 2008

    She’s DC hot at best, which means in real life she’s meh. Tina Fey, on the other hand, I would hit in a heartbeat. If she gave me the time of day.

  34. Lazy Media says at 4:04 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Lana Bang: Jeez, people, it’s not a tournament with one winner. Lots and lots of people are hot. So what if she’s D.C. hot. SHE LIVES IN D.C.! And that poem rocks.

  35. Lana Bang says at 4:19 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Lazy Media: I’m always just floored by the lack of standards in this town. Now that I think of it, so true on many fronts.

  36. Rodney Badger says at 4:20 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Jewish chicks don’t swallow, even if they did go to law school.

  37. Rodney Badger says at 4:26 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Speaking of “LOL,” I was watching To Catch a Predator to see if there were finally going to air my episode and Chris Hanson was reading a chat transcript wherein the boyfriend/pervert typed LOL. But Chris literally laughed out loud when he came to that part of the transcript.

    I worry that this will set a dangerous precedent. What if someone types roflcopter or lollercaust? How do you convey that kind of actual leetspeak in actual speak.

  38. KevoTron says at 4:40 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Sara K. Smith: It’s becoming increasingly difficult to ascertain when comments about buttsecks are appropriate and when it crosses into misogyny. I’ll play it on the safe side and reserve them for threads that pertain to closeted Republicans.

    In regards to Ms. Kornblut I redact my original comment (which was deleted anyways) and just say this:

    I would love to take Ms. Kornblut out for a fancy dinner where I would pull out her chair and make witty, acerbic comments about such refined things as Impressionism, Kafka and the “death of the American dream.”

    And by that I mean…. oh you get the drift.

  39. S.Luggo says at 4:51 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Bandito: Kornblut is not the author of “Make The Pie Higher”. It first appeared in 2002 (when Anne E. was still covering mall openings for the Globe) and is most often attributed to Richard Thompson.
    http://littlecalamity.tripod.com/Text/BushPoem.html
    http://www.thissideofsanity.com/poem/poem0209/poem01.html

  40. shortsshortsshorts says at 6:03 pm, July 18th, 2008

    KevoTron: I agree. I would love to open a door for her and perhaps pull back her chair. Perhaps I would even assist her with her household chores and cook a her a nice meal. And then, well, you know…

  41. Vewol Mevemont says at 6:15 pm, July 18th, 2008

    shortsshortsshorts: KevoTron: That all sounds nice. You will do those lovely things for this charming woman, and I will have the buttsecks. Thank you.

  42. Vewol Mevemont says at 6:25 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Sara K. Smith: Please be gentle with the infants; we are so tender.

  43. KevoTron says at 6:26 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Vewol Mevemont: Misogynist Cretin. Burn in hell. What makes you think Ms. Kornblut “does anal” anyways? What do you think she is? Some kind of evangelical preacher or a Republican congressman?

  44. KevoTron says at 6:30 pm, July 18th, 2008

    I see this thread has legs after all. Hmmm…

    Other things I would do for her:

    Bring chocolates and flowers.

    Cook dinner AND do the dishes.

    Never call her again.

  45. Vewol Mevemont says at 6:33 pm, July 18th, 2008

    KevoTron: Why do you hate babies? Is it because you hate America?

  46. KevoTron says at 6:45 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Vewol Mevemont: Babies should NOT be allowed on Wonkette to discuss teh buttsecks. You might catch teh ghey at a young age and than you cannot be fixed like that Colorado preacher homo. (I mean un-Homo.)

    Really I hate everything. I wake up in the morning and I just HATE! Some people call me bitter. I call myself a sexist, racist, douchebag. (or a Republican. just kidding.)

  47. shortsshortsshorts says at 7:11 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Vewol Mevemont: KevoTron: No, babies should not be allowed to discuss the butt secks because then more Republicans will start coming to Wonkette.

  48. anabellum says at 8:08 pm, July 18th, 2008

    KevoTron: im wondering what happened here…my comment was deleted for being misogynist?…blink blink…

    as i recall, i posted …”im impressed [which i meant]…and she [meaning Kornblut] didnt even mention ‘taut buttocks’…not once…[meaning not falling into a well known cliche, or so i thought]…”

    i get a little tired of the misogyny around here myself [even when its meant jokingly]…

    but ive got to say, if thats why my post was deleted, as opposed to the fact that it simply wasnt funny….then thats absolutely the first time ive even been accused of misogyny……

    rather hard to imagine in fact…hopefully ive got this all wrong…

  49. Mr. Spanky says at 8:35 pm, July 18th, 2008

    Anne: “I want to feel your manhood in me!”

    Me: “Yes, yes! A thousand times yes!

    Ding!

    Dream Over!

  50. Thomas says at 10:00 pm, July 18th, 2008
  51. bitchincamaro says at 4:52 pm, July 19th, 2008

    Sara K. Smith: I think free speech quashing f-word using editors are hot. Back atcha.

  52. melving says at 7:40 pm, July 19th, 2008

    I remember the old days when Anne used to be on the Brit Hume show stuck between those old assholes Freddy Barnes and Chucky Krauthammer. I really felt sorry for her.

  53. shortsshortsshorts says at 12:48 am, July 20th, 2008

    CANKLES.

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