VERY SAD PEOPLE  5:03 pm July 14, 2008

Even The Most Minor Joys Elude Ben Bernanke

by Jim Newell

While the economy continued to melt down over the weekend, Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke spent a few hours hiding from his life at a Washington Nationals baseball game! Alas, he could not escape his horrible, horrible sadness: “Like at every other professional sporting event, a couple minutes is devoted to throwing out free t-shirts and Ben went after a free t-shirt last night like a man possessed. I have rarely seen such intensity in the eyes of a human being. …Yet, the look of agony upon Ben’s face when the t-shirt slipped through his finger tips struck me as odd.” It’s just one thing after another for this guy, right? [The Foodandbeermonger]

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 25 comments }

Botswana Meat Commission FC July 14, 2008 at 5:07 pm

That woman is totally yawning.

I guess that 8 hour, 15-inning pitcher’s duel to see which team would lose their 297th game of the season wasn’t very exciting.

NotUrEvryDayWEzl July 14, 2008 at 5:11 pm

Ah, wonderful. Even the Federal Reserve needs to get some free things sometimes instead of just printing money! Ron Paul would be pleased.

jagorev July 14, 2008 at 5:13 pm

At least those free t-shirts are worth more than my monthly take home pay thanks to Helicopter Ben.

ManchuCandidate July 14, 2008 at 5:13 pm

He flashed on the T-shirt being a metaphor for the US banking system slipping from his graspy fingers.

And come on. It’s les Expos, er, the Nationals. The curse of Youpie hangs over the place like subprime mortgages hang over the credit markets.

policonoclast July 14, 2008 at 5:17 pm

great seats, there. second row next to first base.

Paultardville July 14, 2008 at 5:23 pm

Him watching that t-shirt slip through his hands reminds me of the time I lost my entire retirement on the stock market yesterday. We’re so alike!

kudzu July 14, 2008 at 5:25 pm

Here’s a guy who has no clue about what his job is supposed to be but, then again, neither do I (I’m talking about the Fed Chairman’s job, not mine.)

WadISay July 14, 2008 at 5:33 pm

I assume that, as with those people who sell advertising space on the side of their cars, somebody pays you to wear a Nats t-shirt.

WhatTheHeck July 14, 2008 at 5:36 pm

Soon we’ll be paying $29.00 for a hot dog an a small plastic cup of Bud at a ball game.
Keep printing more money. I have my wheelbarrow at the ready.

Indi July 14, 2008 at 5:39 pm

[re=35780]Paultardville[/re]: Yeah! And I dredged up thoughts of my sub-prime mortgage woes, and though, there is a man who feels just like me and my family! Awwww!

Just wanna hug the Bernanke.

Indi July 14, 2008 at 5:39 pm

[re=35786]WhatTheHeck[/re]: Wheelbarrow? For bringing out our dead?

jagorev July 14, 2008 at 5:40 pm

[re=35776]policonoclast[/re]: Well, when you can print your own money, you can afford to buy tickets to the best seats in the house.

Uncle Al July 14, 2008 at 5:45 pm

I haven’t looked at the news lately–are Freddy and Fanny still alive? I thought the big money people were busy all weekend trying to prevent another Great Depression.

josereyes.theroof July 14, 2008 at 5:52 pm

[re=35771]ManchuCandidate[/re]: I still say the dissolution of the Expos ownership & subsequent relocations — remember, they were in San Juan (!) for games for a few years — is a greater shame than steroids. So, bedevil them forever, Youppi.

Also, I feel bad for the players, since MTL has much better strip-clubs than DC. Though I love the set-up at Fast Eddie’s. Tits in the basement, drinks on the ground-level, billiards on top. Hot damn, three in one.

WhatTheHeck July 14, 2008 at 6:00 pm

[re=35788]Indi[/re]: It will take a wheelbarrow of money to buy a loaf of bread.
History repeats itself.

Paultardville July 14, 2008 at 6:05 pm

[re=35789]jagorev[/re]: Well, the best seats in the house for one of the worst teams in baseball at least. He’d have to be printing Chinese money to score those seats at the All-Star game tomorrow night.

Tawmn July 14, 2008 at 6:08 pm

what’s the forth quarter?

bitchincamaro July 14, 2008 at 6:24 pm

[re=35796]josereyes.theroof[/re]: Beats liquour in the front and poker in the rear.

Borat July 14, 2008 at 6:35 pm

I am so scared that the man in charge of the most powerful economy (well, powerful for at least a few more months) watches baseball and goes to baseball games. This is one sport designed to make your brain go to mush and the closer you get to the field the dumber you get.

Hey I heard W wanted to be president because his dad promised him he could throw the ball out during the world series.

Borat July 14, 2008 at 6:37 pm

[re=35801]WhatTheHeck[/re]: FIAT MONEY PEOPLE!! Let’s just adopt the gold standard and we’ll be safe. Or did Paultardipolooza not teach you this. Oh, you were drunk at 9:30am. Sorry, forgive me

TGY July 14, 2008 at 8:26 pm

Good.

It is meet that one should suffer the nation’s pain.

American Dreamer July 15, 2008 at 1:04 am

Ben Bernake recently joined http://www.millionairematchmakers.com where he has made many eligible young bachelorettes. Try this website out yourself and meet many young bachelorettes too! Or for more discerning palettes try http://www.billionairematchmakers.com. It is easy and inexpensive!

Maj. Major Major Major July 15, 2008 at 6:54 am

Hey, who’s not disappointed when a free MBNA t-shirt slips through his fingers?

econdave July 15, 2008 at 9:48 am

Ben, Ben, Ben. Did you learn nothing in your multiple years of economic education? There’s no such thing as a free t-shirt.

Also, I always liked “Marginal Utility Infielders” as the name for a softball team made up of economists.

Mista Eko July 15, 2008 at 11:37 am

In fairness, nobody finds joy in watching the Nationals.

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