Wonkette
Hey did you hear about the latest Iranian provocation staged by the GOP so Cheney and Special Nuclear Commander John McCain can nuke half the planet on November 3? Well don’t worry, because at least one of the allegedly tested missiles was crappily photoshopped by the Iranian Revolutionary WoW Photoshoppers Guild. The bogus picture was on just about every newspaper front page the other day, so now all the old people who still get the paper are jabbering about four missiles instead of three, the end. (Thanks to Wonkette operative Ura G. for the Dummies cover.)
In an Iranian Image, a Missile Too Many [NYT The Lede]
I dunno. Their mad photoshop skillz terrify me.
Where was Serolf Divad yesterday?
Apparently the brilliant minds at the Revolutionary Guard HQ determined that the US public laughs at three missiles, but shits its collective pants at four missiles.
HA HA HAA HAAA HAAHH AHAHAA! ! !! !! !!
http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/thumb/0/09/305px-IraqMobileProductionFacilities.jpg
HAAA HA!!!!!!
Man you just can’t make this stuff up….. unless you have photoshop.
I bet Iran Photoshops pictures of its dick before posting them in the Casual Encounters section of Israeli Craigslist.
Is there no depth to which these evil mullahs will not descend in order to terrorize us?
Bomb-bomb-bomb, bomb-bomb Iran….
Dude, I’ve got the scoop on my blog!
Mr. President, we must not allow… a photoshop gap!
IRAN MUST BE STOPPED BEFORE IT OBTAINS ILLUSTRATOR
100 bucks says they’re using a pirated copy of Photoshop.
Holy backfire PR B-hatmen!
Dud photoshop artist > Dud Missile.
Anyone remember the post Cold War reports that the 80’s Russian ICBMs couldn’t hit the broad-side of South Dakota on a clear day?
Serolf Divad: That’s brilliant!
Dave J.:
Four missiles that were taken from a North Korean junk yard. I’ve seen higher tech in amateur high-power rockets.
A proper State Department response would be like the tow truck driver in Men In Black…..”Puh-leeeeeze.” Pulls a .45 Magnum from his coveralls.
They’re such photoshop amateurs. Missiles, how cute.
http://img525.imageshack.us/img525/7458/mccainmicrophone477jediqz7.jpg
Serolf Divad: Ha.
Paultardville: Shhh! Keep it down. That’ll be the impetus of war with Iran. Copyright infringement.
Serolf Divad: LIAR Voltron is not a zionist. We all know that the true expression of Robozionism is found in Neon Genesis Evangelion.
Paultardville: That’s fo sho. You know The Profit has a radical view of property rights.
I doubt Joe Lieberman can use Photoshop.
Serolf Divad: You are the only reason embeds should be brought back. You and you alone.
More Healing Brush and less use of the Clone Tool, Mr Crazy President.
It’s a sad day when fake missiles can be photoshopped in Iran, and yet the vastly technologically superior American Wonkette must rely on outsourced visual humor. Serolf Divad rules!
I’m scared. Hold me. And send them Eye-raynians more cigarettes, stat! Just don’t make them those fuckin’ “light” ones. They take too long to work. [It's what uber-patriot Jesse Helms woulda wanted.]
Oh dear god — will this prompt a regional arms race?
Will Israel respond with photoshopped images indicated they have 8 billion soldiers ready to invade the region with 100 million flying tanks from the future?
Are we sure the Iranians actually took the picture? I’m sure somewhere in his evil lair, Dick Cheney has a graphic designer chained up to some chair for the express purpose of photoshopping missiles and other things into Middle Eastern countries he wants to start a war with. See Iraq.
Aw, gee, shucks, guys!
Volunteers for McCain are getting ready to attack Iran
http://www.treehugger.com/army_squirrel.jpg
EnBuenOra:
If the Zionist Entity persists in its aggressive behavior, we shall be forced to obliterate Tel Aviv with the Clone Stamp Tool!
btwbfdimho: Onward warmonger squirrels of the apocalypse !
Obviously our embargoes are working - it looks like they used Photoshop V1.0.
Too bad it’s not stopping them from making atomic bombs and missiles.
What’s missing in this El Adobe Photoshop CS3 version is pixels.
We have vastly more pixels than those silly Iranians. We’ll bury them with pixels.
WhatTheHeck: Can we give them a last cigarette before we do that?
John McCain is aware of digital image manipulation.
shortsshortsshorts:
Sure we can. As long as we retouch out the Marlboro brand with a Camel brand.
I did one of my own. It was time to get my meme on.
Try and spot the pixels that are shopped.
http://buzznet-54.vo.llnwd.net/assets/users16/jimh/default/msg-121571526905.jpg
you know, i’m ok with 3 missiles. but 4? fuck that.
OH NO YOU DI’NT
btwbfdimho: anyone in the MickyCains campaign ought to sign a pledge saying they are first to go to Iran when the war starts.
If you were a muzzie baddy, would you volunteer for suicide duty or photoshop duty. Dude, who needs 72 virgins when you have the slim slacks girl. (has anyone here done her yet? Can you give me her number?)
Those suicide bombers are gonna be pissed when they find out it’s one lousy virgin and 71 photoshopped ones.
just wait till your teevee goes digital.
even my grandma asked me about image manipulation detection software.
wonk_the_heck: Wow your grandma knows more about teh Internet Traditions than I do. Jeebus help us all.
Ken Layne,
Will these photoshopped missiles really delete us or will they merely “virtually” delete us? Does “Virtual” deletion hurt?
Well, I won’t stand for it! I’m going to take some Diazepam and Codeine Sulfate just to be on the safe side. I should reawaken by Monday.
Sincerely and respectfully,
Mr-Clark
Latest statement to the world’s press from IRNA, the Iranian “news” agency.
Are your photoshop are belong to us.
Sorry, couldn’t help it. Bet the bastards were running PS on Chinese bootlegs of XP running on PCs built by the A.Q. Khan network. If they don’t reveal where they’re getting their copies of XP, we should bomb the shi-ite outta them, just to maintain stable supplies of an operating system that actually works.
[...]Online news sites have been abuzz all morning, engaged in a debate over what, exactly, this means.[...]
– from the Digital Natives blog.
This stuff is only getting worse.