Wonkette
Check out the e-mail Hillary Clinton sent us this morning: “In May, Chelsea announced our ‘Project T-Shirt’ contest, and I never imagined we would have such an outpouring of support and great designs. …If you contribute $50 today you’ll get a t-shirt with the winning design and continue to help me pay down our campaign debt.” Some PUMA person is freaking about the deadline for retiring Hillary’s campaign debt being tomorrow, which is about the only logical explanation for her team selling this piece of shit-on-cloth for $50. Coming tomorrow: buy a pebble Hillary Clinton found on the side of I-95 for only $2,300! [Hillary Clinton]
PLEASE FEED ME
Hillary Selling Random Crap At Inflationary Prices, Because Time Is Running Out!
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1:20 PM
on Thu July 10 2008
By
Jim Newell
1012 Views
Eh? Debt deadline? What are they going to do, ruin her credit rating?
Too long, didn’t wear.
Corrected T-shirt slogan: “For everyone who’s ever been the miles ahead front runner but lost anyway and for everyone who can’t deal with reality and never acknowledges losing. This one is for you!”
That won? Can we see the rejected designs?
How does it work? Is she not allowed to pay off the debt from her personal finances or something? I mean shit, if she is- she’s rolling in money. She can figure it out. And I wouldn’t pay 50 bucks for something I would wipe a horses ass with.
Rejected.
Maybe Hilz should start selling a Mad Libs type book using all of the former prez’s crazy comments. Thay should help her debts retire quickly.
Maybe we could give her our economic stimulus checks.
Also, way to half-ass appropriate the “This Bud’s for you.” slogan.
tunamelt: I always thought “Hoes” was spelled “Hos”. Doesn’t the former mean the garden tool?
“This [sillhouette of an 11-year-old girl] is for YOU!”
Jason: Spades before hoes.
Rejected Slogan - “You ungrateful bastards. What the fuck happened?”
tunamelt: “Here’s to you, you pathetic, don’t know when it is time to give up, waste your supporters’ money, out of touch, truth manipulator!”
“I cant’ get enough of me.”
She would get more money pimpin out Chelsea.
How is it the winning design? She’s still holding out hope that Hopey’s hope isn’t good enough?
Damn. And I was hopeying for this one.
How come it’s not like this: FOR EVERYONE WHO HAS BEEN COUNTED OUT BUT REFUSED TO BE KNOCKED OUT…you get the drill…and is that supposed to be she, in a goddamn pantsuit?
For everyone who’s ever said to herself “I SHOULD BE PRESIDENT, I’M WHITE. I’M ENTITLED.”…. This one is for YOU!
/Pfleger-ized
freakishlystrong: Yes, I do believe the silhouette is supposed to be Hillz in a pantsuit. But why does she have male genitalia?
Alternate design…
For everyone who’s ever had a BLACK MAN STEALING THE SHOW, this one is for you!
2nd Place: PLEASE GOD GIVE ME MONEY MARK PENN THREATENED TO EAT MY CAT
Uncle Al: seems like a pretty accurate portrayal of her pusspouch, but it might also be her truck nutz.
That font is like two clicks away from being comic sans. OH MAN, I hate comic sans.
Rev. Peter Lemonjello:
It looks like she’s wearing Oops I Crapped My Pants.
Botswana Meat Commission FC: why would they choose something that unflattering? jesus. why not just use that godawful picture of her and bill dancing in their swimsuits? (ps: greatful that wonkette no longer crossposts to lezebel. could you imagine?)
You’ll get a free copy of Hillary’s campaign DVD, Shoveling Shit Against the Tide, with a $75 donation.
A $100 donation will get you a free copy of “Presidential Campaign Home Game”.
Pledge now.
Uncle Al: Ummm…because SHE does…didn’t you hear?
Rev. Peter Lemonjello: grateful, dipshit
Here’s the one Larry Craig submitted. Loser.
In the PUMA comments:
“I am on Social Security and this is my second contribution in this amount this month. For me it means that this month I will not order any books from Amazon, my monthly treat to myself, and I will not buy any fabric to make shopping bags, another favorite activity.”
Sounds about right.
I’m in if they have a sweatshirt/sweatpants combo that makes it look like you’re really wearing a pantsuit.
Oh and the grammar on that shirt is IMPECCABLE.
toastandlove: I thought it was a hard-on at first.
Leave it to a faux feminist, having a t-shirt contest, that isn’t even wet!
umm, this will never sell. the main problem is all the XXXL sizes are sold out and there is no XXXXL, or as I like to say after spending my whole day on excel (X^4+L)
hmmm…i visited the site, thats all i did…….and now im being spammed with ‘notes from Hillary’…
Walter Sobchak: I haven’t seen that many rubes since Springfield bought the monorail.
“Monorail. Monorail.”