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Hillary Selling Random Crap At Inflationary Prices, Because Time Is Running Out!

Check out the e-mail Hillary Clinton sent us this morning: “In May, Chelsea announced our ‘Project T-Shirt’ contest, and I never imagined we would have such an outpouring of support and great designs. …If you contribute $50 today you’ll get a t-shirt with the winning design and continue to help me pay down our campaign debt.Some PUMA person is freaking about the deadline for retiring Hillary’s campaign debt being tomorrow, which is about the only logical explanation for her team selling this piece of shit-on-cloth for $50. Coming tomorrow: buy a pebble Hillary Clinton found on the side of I-95 for only $2,300! [Hillary Clinton]

About the author

Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

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  1. ManchuCandidate

    Corrected T-shirt slogan: “For everyone who’s ever been the miles ahead front runner but lost anyway and for everyone who can’t deal with reality and never acknowledges losing. This one is for you!”

  2. shortsshortsshorts

    How does it work? Is she not allowed to pay off the debt from her personal finances or something? I mean shit, if she is- she’s rolling in money. She can figure it out. And I wouldn’t pay 50 bucks for something I would wipe a horses ass with.

  3. sweetits

    Maybe Hilz should start selling a Mad Libs type book using all of the former prez’s crazy comments. Thay should help her debts retire quickly.

  4. Jason

    [re=33012]tunamelt[/re]: I always thought “Hoes” was spelled “Hos”. Doesn’t the former mean the garden tool?

  5. Doglessliberal

    [re=33018]tunamelt[/re]: “Here’s to you, you pathetic, don’t know when it is time to give up, waste your supporters’ money, out of touch, truth manipulator!”

  6. ForeignSickSpecialist

    How is it the winning design? She’s still holding out hope that Hopey’s hope isn’t good enough?

  7. freakishlystrong

    How come it’s not like this: FOR EVERYONE WHO HAS BEEN COUNTED OUT BUT REFUSED TO BE KNOCKED OUT…you get the drill…and is that supposed to be she, in a goddamn pantsuit?

  8. Botswana Meat Commission FC

    For everyone who’s ever said to herself “I SHOULD BE PRESIDENT, I’M WHITE. I’M ENTITLED.”…. This one is for YOU!


  9. Uncle Al

    [re=33038]freakishlystrong[/re]: Yes, I do believe the silhouette is supposed to be Hillz in a pantsuit. But why does she have male genitalia?

  10. Botswana Meat Commission FC

    Alternate design…

    For everyone who’s ever had a BLACK MAN STEALING THE SHOW, this one is for you!

  11. Rev. Peter Lemonjello

    [re=33045]Uncle Al[/re]: seems like a pretty accurate portrayal of her pusspouch, but it might also be her truck nutz.

  12. Botswana Meat Commission FC

    [re=33052]Rev. Peter Lemonjello[/re]:
    It looks like she’s wearing Oops I Crapped My Pants.

  13. Rev. Peter Lemonjello

    [re=33056]Botswana Meat Commission FC[/re]: why would they choose something that unflattering? jesus. why not just use that godawful picture of her and bill dancing in their swimsuits? (ps: greatful that wonkette no longer crossposts to lezebel. could you imagine?)

  14. Servo

    You’ll get a free copy of Hillary’s campaign DVD, Shoveling Shit Against the Tide, with a $75 donation.
    A $100 donation will get you a free copy of “Presidential Campaign Home Game”.

    Pledge now.

  15. Walter Sobchak

    In the PUMA comments:

    “I am on Social Security and this is my second contribution in this amount this month. For me it means that this month I will not order any books from Amazon, my monthly treat to myself, and I will not buy any fabric to make shopping bags, another favorite activity.”

    Sounds about right.

  16. NoWireHangers

    I’m in if they have a sweatshirt/sweatpants combo that makes it look like you’re really wearing a pantsuit.

  17. Borat

    umm, this will never sell. the main problem is all the XXXL sizes are sold out and there is no XXXXL, or as I like to say after spending my whole day on excel (X^4+L)

  18. anabellum

    hmmm…i visited the site, thats all i did…….and now im being spammed with ‘notes from Hillary’…

  19. SwanSwanH

    [re=33087]Walter Sobchak[/re]: I haven’t seen that many rubes since Springfield bought the monorail.

    “Monorail. Monorail.”

Comments are closed.