Wonkette
After an exciting day of voting, the Senate has voted in favor of the new FISA surveillance bill, 69-28, and George Bush will now sign it into law in his secret masturbatorium.
Earlier in the day it rejected an amendment to strip retroactive immunity for telecom companies facing wiretapping lawsuits, 66-32; an amendment to have a district judge assess warrantless wiretapping before granting immunity, 61-37; and an amendment to delay immunity until after a yearlong government investigation into warrantless wiretapping, 56-42.
Barack Obama voted for the three failed amendments and later voted for the underlying bill.
John McCain did not show up to vote for anything, because he is too busy calling Obama a sally for voting.
Hillary Clinton voted for all three amendments but voted against the final bill.
Jim Webb shot everyone in the face for stealing from his knapsack of oats, which he carries on his person at all times.
[AP, Glenn Greenwald (if you feel like working yourself into a lather)]
On the bright side, phone sex is about to become a lot more interesting.
Cue a cacophony of outraged squawks from DailyKos.
At least Jim Webb knows the score.
VOIP for the win!
Hills voted ‘nay’. Full votes in Michigan and Florida should’ve been counted! Haha, it is to laugh.
On one hand I’m pissed at Obama for voting for the effing thing even without those amendments, but I’m actually more pissed at the metric assload of Democrats who voted against the amendments in the first place.
This Hillary Clinton sounds like a politician with principle. She should think about running for president.
Who else thinks the only reason Hillary Clinton voted for this bill was to twist the knife?
When we see such low approval ratings for Congress, it would at least be nice to think that people hated Congress because they were informed about shit like this being passed. Sadly, we’re a Nation of morans governed by assholes. Why, Barry, why?! At least Dick Durbin and Barbara Boxer didn’t let me down. Feinstein, suck an egg. Even Tester voted against, and he has that terrible haircut!
The full list of votes is here so that the names of the traitors are ready should the revolution ever come: http://www.senate.gov/legislative/LIS/roll_call_lists/roll_call_vote_cfm.cfm?congress=110&session=2&vote=00168
I’m getting a new pre-pay phone every time a need to make a call [to a dealer or client] now. FIND ME THEN, BITCHES!
Tips to get by FISA law:
Take two cans and connect them with an extremely long piece of string, then let the magic happen.
Terrible move, Barry. You’re quickly turning one of your biggest supporters into someone a little less than excited.
Oh well, I’m in Massachusetts so my vote doesn’t count anyway.
Hillary voted for it, so she might eavesdrop on Amurcans, and find out why she came in second place. We know Terry McAuliffe’s egregious lying ass won’t tell her the truth… but fuck, if your boss were Hill and you had to tell her “honey, you’re not going to make it,” wouldn’t you want to lie, then jump on the next plane to Madagascar?
shortsshortsshorts: Two words: Carrier pigeons.
Barry did this to woo the uncommitted Center, because he can, because you’ll still vote for him, twice if you could, and he knows you know he knows it.
shortsshortsshorts: Sadly, after he shot up the crowd, he voted ‘Yea’.
I’ll fool them. I will only answer the phone when it isn’t ringing.
Ha!
Hillary voted against the bill? Wow, that is the first time in many, many months that Hillary has been better than Barry in any aspect of her existence.
Happy Fun Ball: You’re right, but things like this make me so mad.
Fuck the uncommitted center! Fuck the swing states! It’s fine and dandy for the wingnuts to let their nuttery hang out, but the minute you’re a “liberal” you’re a sniveling sack of shit and you must hide it to woo the morans. Sit on a flag pin, fuckers. Give me back my Fourth Amendment!
So it’s okay to listen to Barry’s phone conversations now.
eatsshootsleaves: I meant “against” the bill, of course.
I just hope that, in the Obama administration, attorney general F. Lee Bailey uses these powers to the max to tap the phone calls from the RNC to their butt-persons.
jagorev: You know she did it to make us jealous. Hillz said “nay” and looked around the Senate chambers all like, “This is what you’re missing out on, fuckers!” and “Where’s your God now, Moses?” and “Don’t you wish your nominee was hot like me?” and shit.
NoWireHangers: While I know that you are joking… old forms of communication, i.e., letters, are actually more secure. Clearly the post office was lobbying for this bill.
NoWireHangers: Hillary for President 2012 will likely send out a memo regarding this to likely Democratic primary voters within the hour, not realizing that “Hillary for President 2012″ was supposed to be kept a secret for like 3 more years.
NoWireHangers: Word. Also, I’ll bet Hillary would TOTES have voted for it had she still been in the running.
Barry has taken such a dive that I’m finding myself sliding back into a state of complete and utter apathy, with a side of cynicism.
Ted Kennedy didn’t vote either? What an asshole.
I fuckin’ love oats.
NoWireHangers: Salt in the Barack betrayal wound.
NotUrEvryDayWEzl: There is something romantic about investing in fine, high grade stationary, a sturdy ballpoint pen, stroking by lady-beard while composing a thoughtful letter, and then sleeping with the Pony Express man. Maybe you’re on to something…
NoWireHangers: yeah, I can totally see Hillary in the role of the crazy ex who you were glad to be rid off but you still want to hook up with her every once in a while, even if it leaves you with nothing but self-loathing and emptiness afterwards.
Or maybe those are just my fantasies.
NotUrEvryDayWEzl: Assuming of course, that you’re not being stalked and tormented by a closeted homosexual, former over-rated incomplete professional baseball player, who pays people not only to screw with your internets, but also to go into those big blue boxes, and pull out your mail to read, because he’s decided that will somehow help him keep his secret life of nubile young Latino boys and fruity drink going. It’s a big assumption. Just saying.
eatsshootsleaves: Well, it worked.
NoWireHangers: John Kerry voted against as well, but nobody cared.
But to be perfectly honest, who in the 18-24 demo has used a phone in the last four years, anyway?
tunamelt: You know that cell phone operators are also phone companies right?
tunamelt: This is cell phones too, not just landlines. AT&T owns both.
NoWireHangers: AT&T? They own fucking EVERYTHING, even your dog, so you should probably shoot your dog.
jagorev: Uh oh! I can’t wait for the feds to listen in on my 3am booty calls. Do they get to read my drunk text messages, too? I feel like there is a good chance I’m going to get arrested because of this law.
Think Hillz will use this and other fodder collected between now and the convention to hijack Barry’s base and cause mass rioting?
As usual, my Senator Barbara (”Fireplug”) Mikulski (D-Pothole) voted wrong.
She only gets reelection margins of 70 to 30, so she has to be very careful about not pissing off the right wing 30-percent in Maryland.
I think her major malfunction is that she realizes that if she lost her Senate gig, she’d be homeless and dead within a month, because she’s such an obnoxious and freaky-looking person, no one would ever hire her.
Sorry for the venting.
I can’t say that I’m surprised. Politicians listening to their constituency? How foolish of an ideal! All DC denizens know that your wad of “play money” has to be bigger than your cock and contain at least ten portraits of Franklin (per day). Democracy, what a hearty rouse!
Now they don’t even need to make shit up when they illegally spy on you for buying pot off a corner. They can just say they were following a known terror suspect and arrested them when they bought a “controlled” substance. (They call used to call that, “A hunch!”)
Everyone knows that weed –> liberalism –> terrorism = No More Pancakes on a Stick.
@Uncle Al: Of course! If Mikulski lost her Senate seat, she’d be forced to go back to Ring-a-ling brothers. There’s nothing like the threat of earning a living (by jumping out of a clown car full other midgets) to scare the corruption back in to you!
NotUrEvryDayWEzl: Even pre-paid cell phones have GPS, and all the Waffen SS needs is about 10 seconds to triangulate your position.
Bush, Cheney and their hoes in Congress have buried the decayed corpse of liberty. You weren’t using those silly little civil rights anyway. Stay the course! Mission Accomplished! Dissent is terrorism! The Constitution is a dangerous document that never should have been written! All of you will be re-educated at the Gitmo Federal Vacation Resort.
You know, this is why I communicate only through telegraph now days.
Lionel Hutz Esq.: American Telephone & Telegraph owns that too.
While it is sorta fun watching the Obamamaniacs getting their political cherries popped, Barack HAS to win. This vote is not going to seriously hurt him, is it?
shortsshortsshorts: Damn them and their use of letters!
Oh, so this is why McCain doesn’t use the Internet tubes or the phone or even the telegraph. It’s hard to spy on someone carving stone tablets in their cave. That’s not wi-wireta-apping we can be-elieve in!
Don’t you think the rethugs re starting to regret this whole thing cuz they realize there is not going to be a perpetual Republican majority? They are giving Barry untold powers, which he can be a total bitch by rejecting. Ha Ha
DemmeFatale: I wondered why it hurt when I sit down! Yes, Barry took the dive because he knew that the Repubs would use a “no” vote to try to paint him as weak on terror. And no, it probably won’t hurt him except with the super-purists that would have found something else to hyperventilate about by November anyway.
Now I’m off to HuffPo to see how many times I can find the phrases “fascist corporations”, “jackbooted thugs”, and “raping the Constitution/4th amendment” in the comments. Yay liberal hyperbole!
RUSS FEINGOLD 4EVAH
Cicada: Or, as the probable prez, he wants every possible tool at his fingertips for anti-terrorism purposes, correct or not. I say not, but…ah fuck it, this annoys me. He didn’t have to do this.
Re-Elect Gore ‘08.