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Barack Obama Relaxed Your Summer Dress Code!

Guess what, Democratic National Committee kids working through the hot summer months while everybody else is pretty much not thinking at all about the election?

The DNC says you can sorta dress down for summer — but not like a complete whore or a bum! Read the new Dress Code and feel the wind beneath your … uh, skirt.

SUMMER DRESS CODE:

Good news. We are relaxing the dress code. So what does that mean for you? The expectation is that your attire remain professional and crisp despite the weather.

Clean, no holes, no frayed bottoms jeans that fit properly for an office environment are acceptable.

Professional looking casual shirts and blouses – which means collar shirts for men, no graphics or advertisements and appropriate neck lines and waist lengths for women. Summer dresses and skirts should also remain professional in style and length.

Long pants and capri length pants only. Bermuda or knee length shorts are for the weekend BBQ.

One final word and a favorite for many staff. Acceptable footwear are shoes or sandals only – sorry, no thwack, thwack, thwack – translation NO FLIP FLOPS.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Come back refreshed and ready To Change America and work your heart out for Barak Obama!

THAT IS ALL FOR NOW…ENJOY THE FOURTH OF July!

Yes it’s true: The jackass who sent this email from DNC Headquarters doesn’t know how to spell Barack Obama, either.

About the author

A writer and editor of this website from 2006 to early 2012, Ken Layne is occassionally seen on Twitter and writes small books and is already haunting you from beyond (your) grave.

View all articles by Ken Layne
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76 comments

  1. HomoPolitico

    But I thought gettin’ some “Thwack, thwack, thwack” was the only reason ANYONE canvassed for the DNC.

    You know those Dem chicks like to fuck.

  2. ManchuCandidate

    “sorry, no thwack, thwack, thwack- translation NO FLIP FLOPS.”
    Sorry, it doesn’t translate to flip flops. Damn you, masturbation free DNC!

    I do think that the pic is an acceptable use of the US America Flag.

  3. SayItWithWookies

    Meanwhile, the GOP interns are allowed to wear thongs to work — although the girls must still wear proper office attire.

  4. shortsshortsshorts

    [re=29601]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: Correction on FOURTH. What the hell are you talking about??

  5. obfuscator

    [re=29600]ManchuCandidate[/re]:

    They really should have included a ‘no crocs’ rule, too. I’m not sure what sex-noise they make, though. “Fap, fap, fap?”

  6. Canuckledragger

    Geez, Ken Layne, you coulda made your point by using a photo of Abbie Hoffman wearing his sacreligious Stars’n’Stripes shirt. But NO! Not you, nosiree. You had to find a photo of an alluring young strumpet that bears no relevance…to….your

    …alluring….young…

    *fap fap fap fap*

    OK, what was I saying? Oh yeah…

    Geez, Ken Layne, you coulda……

    rinse and repeat ad infinitum

  7. greatgooglymoogly

    This is what they dictate to volunteers? What does the paid staff have to wear, straight jackets?

  8. Neilist

    Well, thank GOD Bermuda shorts are still . . . “in fashion.”

    In some circles, that is.

    The poorly dressed ones.


  9. Post author
    Ken Layne

    Because it’s the Fourth of July and the DNC has pretty much moved to Barry Obama’s Chicago, I thought I’d combine the magical subjects of July 4, Chicago and removing clothes for summer with a picture of Chicago’s own Liz Phair semi-clad in a wet American flag. You’re welcome. Now go away and we’ll see you Monday.

  10. Makeithurt

    I kinda hoped for the Latter Day Saints cult look for Barry’s lay-dees : you know, long dress, poofy sleeves, faux french braid, tenny runners. They’re HOT!

  11. obfuscator

    [re=29619]Ken Layne[/re]:

    I’m sure the DNC staffers are super-pumped about working for change on behalf of their party leader, Senator Barak Obamma.

  12. obfuscator

    [re=29625]loquaciousmusic[/re]:

    Uhhfff… Zubaz. You know that look isn’t complete without a do-rag and a pair of knockoff Oakleys, right? Don’t forget the Gold’s Gym tank top.

  13. pickleandcake

    Neilist, bermuda shorts are SO back. they’re the new lady’s work short in a nice khaki or grey twill. Hey-it’s better than pleated, tapered navy slacks or oversized polos that are otherwise de rigeur at the Capital. bermuda shorts are THE look for elitest at Bar B Qs this summer.

    Why did Liz get the flag wet?

  14. Lascauxcaveman

    [re=29619]Ken Layne[/re]: [re=29610]melving[/re]: You know that old saying about how a chick always looks hotter if she’s playing a guitar? Well Liz Phair is just about the epitome of that truism.

    And this flag pic is the exception that proves the rule.

  15. loquaciousmusic

    [re=29628]obfuscator[/re]: Hey, Barry and Michelle already have the folding canvas chairs from Sports Authority. They’re halfway there!

    I would also like to see Barry dance to Scritti Politti. Just once. I don’t care which song.

  16. shortsshortsshorts

    [re=29625]loquaciousmusic[/re]: So many attempts to bring back spandex. All of them failed, UNTIL NOW.

    [Your album is awesome by the way, but you need a band. I know people in your area if you want the hookup.]

  17. Anita Cocktail

    [re=29620]Makeithurt[/re]: Close — I was thinking more of the Texas polygamist look. What say ye, Sister Wife?

  18. columnv

    THAT IS ALL FOR NOW…ENJOY THE FOURTH OF July!

    That’s my favorite part. They yell at readers to stop paying attention to their stupid letter and go have fun.

  19. obfuscator

    [re=29631]loquaciousmusic[/re]:

    Give ‘em matching fanny packs emblazoned with the presidential seal, and they’re all set.

  20. edgydrifter

    [re=29629]pickleandcake[/re]: Because it’s hard to look pouty and alluring when the flag draped over your succulent flesh is on fire.

  21. edgydrifter

    Between Ms. Sniffmyass in the American Apparel sidebar and dreamy wet-flag-contest photos of Liz, Wonkette is putting out a little FHM vibe lately. Saucy!

  22. professor.cj

    The only reason I’m a demi-crat is so I can wear my banana-hammock when and as I choose, without fear of Leviticus-spouting Republicans condemning me for obvious reasons. Now, according to the new bi-laws of the Demi-Crat party, I will wear my banana-hammock with lace-up oxfords, as God, Moses, and Churchill decreed. Watermelon, vodka, and banana-hammocks for all!!!!

  23. obfuscator

    [re=29643]edgydrifter[/re]:

    Rick Monday sees that picture and feels deeply conflicted… and horny.

  24. ManchuCandidate

    [re=29655]FunkyPalmettoBug[/re]:
    Too bad it’s just for the male interns and the heavy set guys.

  25. PoliticalGraffiti

    this reminds me of the time that i drank too much and pranced around wearing an upside down/inside out american flag. good times

  26. AngryBlakGuy

    …I guess the “Slim Slack” girl wont be paying them a visit with that dress code!

  27. FunkyPalmettoBug

    [re=29656]ManchuCandidate[/re]: What, the thought of Dick Armey in pigtails and a tied-off plaid shirt doesn’t move the mountain for you?

  28. Mr. Spanky

    Ah! A slippery, wet Ms. Phair!

    What a wonderful image to celebrate the 4th!

    God Bless America!!!

  29. lawrenceofthedesert

    Before you say “Holy Cow,” you should know Liz ain’t from Chicago; she’s a wealthy girl from Kenilworth, a chi-chi la-la suburb on the North Shore that likes to keep the Jews out. About as Democratic as Utah, and just as uptight. Otoh, maybe she’s the first progressive person produced by Kenilworth; stranger things have happened. Haven’t they? I mean, a true Kenilworth woman would wear pearls with an American flag… Given that Liz is using an American flag as a bath towel, functional fixedness doesn’t seem to be an issue, and that’s often an obstacle to liberation.

  30. ManchuCandidate

    [re=29659]FunkyPalmettoBug[/re]:
    Or a vision of Denny Hastert’s Peter Griffinesque turn in the Daisy Dukes.

    Sorry FPB, no mountains moved. Ooops, the mere thought of which has turned my outie into an innie.

  31. josereyes.theroof

    [re=29619]Ken Layne[/re]: Should have gone two-for-one, with the babes from Veruca Salt.

  32. Mr. Spanky

    [re=29662]lawrenceofthedesert[/re]: I’m sorry dude, but my other “head” took over for my post!

    Damn! I’d like to be in that shower with Liz……….

  33. loquaciousmusic

    [re=29632]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: I’m glad you like the album, Short. Let’s get back to chatting on the Facebook, aka “In Real Life,” aka “At a John McCain Campaign Rally.”

  34. DangerousLiberal

    [re=29619]Ken Layne[/re]: Thanks, Ken! My summer dress code: all women in my presence need to look and dress like Liz Phair.

  35. liquiddaddy

    She will reissue “Exile in Guyville” this year. A classic record with more nude Liz photos.

  36. FunkyPalmettoBug

    [re=29707]DangerousLiberal[/re]: That needs to be a federal law.

    [re=29712]liquiddaddy[/re]: It came out this week.

  37. S.Luggo

    “To Change America and work your heart out for Barak Obama!”
    As I would for Geoge Bush.

  38. gurukalehuru

    I like “thwack,thwack,thwack” much better than “fap, fap, fap,” but I’d be happy with a little bit of either.

  39. S.Luggo

    The red, white and boobs.
    Thank you, thank you. No, really. You were a great audience. Bingo tonight in the canasta room.

  40. Terry

    Damn, I must be getting old. That dress codes seems pretty reasonable. The youngsters these days!

  41. seanr1978

    I’ll bet the real reason for that flip-flop ban at the DNC is to prevent PTSD flashbacks from the 2004 Republican convention. ;-)

    I love my job – I can wear pretty much anything I want. Flip-flops are not uncommon around our office. I wear shorts and t-shirts pretty frequently.

  42. Mr. Dick Sprinkles

    We need several dozen cheerleaders dressed exactly like this at the Obama Bowl acceptance speech blowout fiesta jam.

  43. TGY

    Also, you can only dress like that if you’re Liz Phair. Ah, Liz, my heart beats for you or something.

  44. Unindicted Co-Conspirator

    [re=29662]lawrenceofthedesert[/re]:
    Actually she from Winnetka, which does have Jews.
    Fuck Kenilworth, the whole place could burn down & I won’t miss those assholes!

  45. Smoke Filled Roommate

    As a female, I put her in my ‘minyr annoyances in music’ category along with Sheryl Crow and Juliana Hatfield.

  46. DoctorCulturae

    [re=29929]Smoke Filled Roommate[/re]: Agreed. Another in a long line or rockers for whom it is not music, but the power of the private parts which are the reason for any attention at all. “F & Run” indeed.

  47. Lascauxcaveman

    [re=29941]DoctorCulturae, Smoke Filled Roommate[/re]: Oh honestly, the way you talk. You probably hate Jane Wiedlin and Sleater-Kinney, too.

  48. Tiki Geezer

    Yeah, Smoke Filled – you’re just a sucker for her lucky, pretty eyes… Honestly, “whitechocolatespaceegg” is a work of eff’ing genius, you should listen to it all the way thru before spouting off your misogynistic piehole…

  49. Mr-Clark

    Ken Layne,

    “Casual Fridays” have less restrictions here in San Francisco. I have one fashion rule: If I can’t wear it to the gym it doesn’t belong in my wardrobe.

    It figures the DNC would have to come out with a “summer Dress Code,” as the last time I saw Howard Dean being interviewed he was wearing a pink dress shirt and flop-sweat. How very 80′s. (In that kind of cocaine dance club thing that was happening.)

    Sincerely and respectfully,

    Mr-Clark

  50. Borat

    do you get bonus points for stained blue dresses.

    well, that’s better than the GOPs altar boys, pages, and airport bathroom encounters.

  51. Senhor Tambor

    Liz is a great lookin’ gal, and a utility grade guitarist. Good enough for me. Come slumming to Northbrook, Lizzie.

  52. thefrontpage

    What about tank tops, midriff-baring shirts for women in their 40s, shirts that have fake rips in them, shirts covered in rhinestones, shirts that show drawings of pot, Confederate flag shirts, pants and hats, long leather boots that go up to your knees, skimpy T-shirts with political slogans, and shirts that with arrows pointing toward your crotch? Shouldn’t those be allowed at the DNC?!

  53. cliffrocks

    I think shirts with arrows pointing at the crotch are cool provided crotch content is labeled by the shirt itself such as Under Construction / Obamacrat in the oven/ And my personal favorites ?slippery when wet/ Caution: Biohazard

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