Oh hey look it’s another poll, from the Numbers People! Exciting new statistics show that Barry Obama is ahead of John McCain in the Muslim state of Michigan, plus Minnesota, Wisconsin, and Colorado. This was a poll among likely voters, which your boyfriend Chuck Todd cautions may not be the best measure in a year when turnout is expected to be OFF THE CHAIN Y’ALL. (Chuck prefers registered voters to likely ones, because he is an Elitist.) The point is, John McCain will win in a landslide when a Terrorist Meteor hits Ohio’s beloved Cornhole Tournament and all of America’s likely voters are deported to Guantanamo. [Wall Street Journal]
Obama Ahead In Millions Of Battleground States
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{ 55 comments }
yeah, but teh squirrel with teh nutz iz votin for teh Barryz. (I am not clever enough to find and link to the squirrel-with-nutz pic)
Somehow the McCain message of intolerance, fear, oppression, misery and poverty isn’t resonating with the American public. Maybe he needs a sexier spokesperson.
Sweet. Once that terrorist meteor hits we can finally go to war with those damned bug from Starship Troopers! They hate us for our freedom, so I’ve heard
I for one welcome our new Muslim, Hopey Overlord.
…these guys are so demoralized its funny! Last night on Olberman he highlighted a Republican Oregon congressman who is now referencing how much he worked **WITH** Barack Obama.
Isn’t Minnesota the Muslim state due to Ellison?
Ha, ha… you can’t fool me Sarah… I know that there are only, like, 100 states… max.
[re=25116]SayItWithWookies[/re]: …the question now is how long before McCain completely throws Bush and the conservatives under the Straight Talk Express and becomes a moderate Democrat.
[re=25117]Crapola[/re]:
“The only good bug is a dead bug.”
there have been two (2) horizon-to-horizon double rainbows in the DC Metro area in the past week. These were clearly a sign of the Ascendance of the Muslim Rainbow-Pooping Unicorn God. These polls seem to agree.
It is bad news for Republicans if people are starting to prefer the Muslim, black-separatist baby killer over the maverick.
McCain’s campaign will end badly, but I’m guessing it will happen during the last of the 10 billion presidential debates when McCain freaks out and attacks Barry. The only thing that will be damaged will be Obama’s shoe as that’s the only thing Walnuts can reach.
Even funnier, every time these polls come out, the McCain campaign trots out Karl fucking Rove to react – who probably plunges McCain’s numbers by two more percent just by opening his yap. Talk about the uncertainty principle!
[re=25131]Doglessliberal[/re]: Seems to be the only reasonable explanation…
if Ohioans stop cornholing, the terrorists have won!
These polls, as with most polls, don’t make any sense and are a stinking pile of crap. McCain’s going to win in November, meteor or not.
[re=25131]Doglessliberal[/re]: …I always thought rainbows were proof positive of the threat that Homosexual marriage poses to “traditional” family values?!
The truth that McInsane may not be alive in November has finally seeped through the bedrock layer of their skulls.
[re=25144]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: oh drat, I always confuse my heavenly portents.
Cornholers sure do love Obama
My woman be doin’ business in Colorado. She stated explicitly last night that she has seen one bumper sticker for WALNUTS since being there, which states:
“McCain:
Don’t give Bush a third term.”
[re=25144]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: That’s only when there’s a fat purple creature with a tv on its stomach sliding down the rainbow.
Let me know when Wyoming is officially in play and Lieberman says, “You know, maybe I have been a bit of a douchebag lately.”
[re=25131]Doglessliberal[/re]: The day Obama was in Los Angeles, I got home in 45 mins instead of an hour and fifteen. Clearly a miracle.
[re=25125]Serolf Divad[/re]: I got confused during the primaries, though. We need more stars on the flag. The states of Puerto Rico, District of Columbia, and Guam- especially Guam, have been vastly underrepresented in the fabric of Americana.
In all seriousness, it makes my cornhole pucker when they talk about how a “terrorist attack” would help John McScary..I mean, I put nothing passed these cornholios…
[re=25113]Doglessliberal[/re]: Here you go: http://i30.tinypic.com/xvdzd.jpg
[re=25160]WadISay[/re]: Lieberman was interviewed on All Things Condidered last night, and I had to turn the radio down. The combination of his voice with the crap coming out of his mouth was too much to bear.
[re=25164]Walter Sobchak[/re]: you are my hero
[re=25167]Doglessliberal[/re]: It’s awful isn’t it? He sounds like Dr. Marvin Monroe…
[re=25125]Serolf Divad[/re]: There are only 57 states. Everybody knows that. You must be one of them childs that got left behind.
[re=25126]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: Never — McCrone’s in this all the way, even if it means there’s gonna be some serious insanity at the end. Remember Clinton vs. Dole when Bob Dole vowed to campaign nonstop for like, the last 100 hours of the race? And how after four days of sleep deprivation he was crazier than a bedbug? Come November McCrone’s gonna make that level of crazy sound like Alan Greenspan parsing the tax code.
[re=25117]Crapola[/re]:
But that meteor’s not gonna hit till 2012, right? By then, Wally oughta be pushin’ daisies. So, this meteor may be all there is to save us from a Jeb Boosch presnitcy!
SERIOUSLY I must ask:
Has anyone seen a WALNUTS bumper sticker in a swing-state? California burns them like its Huck Fin.
[re=25178]weirdiowasculpture[/re]:
They tawt mee in Skoolz der waz onllee thirteeeen. But that waz bak wen I was in furst grad wit WALNUTZ!
[re=25184]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: I live in the WALNUTS capitol of the world, awash in Wobbleheads and Cottontops, home of the Gayest Gov ever! and I haven’t seen one…
[re=25175]freakishlystrong[/re]: aural rohypnol
From the Cincinatti Enquirer:
“According to the Web site of the American Cornhole Association – based in Warren County – no one is quite sure how the game began, but some people trace it back to 14th-century Germany. It was rediscovered about 100 years ago in the hills of Kentucky. Kentuckians brought it with them when they moved north of the Ohio River generations ago.”
I think I know how it started, and why it was rediscovered in Kentucky.
I live in Houston and the bumper stickers I see in order of frequency are Hillary ’08, W ’04, and Obama ’08. I have not yet seen a single McCain sticker.
Maybe its that WALNUTS charges so much money for them, because he is broke?
[re=25131]Doglessliberal[/re]: Well, Obama can’t take all the credit. I hear Timmie Russert in heaven bestowed one of those rainbows just as the media left his wake so Keithie could continue to wax loquaciously about the magnificence that was Timmie.
http://www.fivethirtyeight.com/ Very pro-Obama commentary, but their math seems pretty good.
It’s very delicious to hear Karl Rove call Barack Obama “arrogant.” We all know how utterly humble and deferential dear Karl is.
[re=25184]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: I live in PA, where you’d think you may seem some WALNUTS! stickers, but alas, I cannot recall seeing one yet. I was just joking about that to a co-worker, who is an active member of a county Young Republicans club in the area. I told her that I’ve seen more Fred Thompson stickers (a sight funny in and of itself – http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2330/1936014588_6b9dcb8eef.jpg).
She brought me a McCain bumper sticker and a pin back from their meeting they had with McCain reps (I had previously given her an Obama bumper sticker and pin), just to prove that the stickers existed.
I found it amusing that the sticker, while union-printed, is on material made by Zip-Strips (R), “The Removable Bumper Stickers”, whose logo and slogan is patterned on the backing.
Well %90 percent of all statistics can be made to say anything, %50 of the time.
You know..uh..I actually haven’t seen a McCain bumper sticker here in the metro Atlanta area. Maybe they’re waiting to print them in hopes his VP is sexier than he is. They could do a place-filler like “McCain/Somebody-Much-Younger-and-More-Interesting”, but alas, they would only fit on big-ass Hummer or Suburban bumpers. Sad news for WALNUTS!, indeed.
[re=25362]TGY[/re]: [re=25269]Elitist Republican Tard[/re]: [re=25215]Cool2Snog[/re]: [re=25191]freakishlystrong[/re]:
Well shit. There we have it. Nobody, anywhere, ever, has a WALNUTS sticker. I surveyed people in my “reality-world” and nope. Nobody has a sticker. Poor WALNUTS.
[re=25380]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: “reality-world” — do you mean “carbon community?”
[re=25138]Jobbotch[/re]: I too have found the dog-and-turdblossom show odd. The guy hasn’t been right about ANYTHING in years. He still thinks the ‘publicans won the midterms in 06 according to “his math.”
[re=25380]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: OK, sad to say, but there are quite a few McCain stickers in the Northern VA area. Along with the many “W” stickers and “Bush/Cheney ’04″ ones. That being said, there are tons more Barry stickers, buttons, signs, etc.
[re=25123]Brutus Harlot[/re]: You’ve never driven though Dearborn or Dearborn Heights, have you?
Do truck nutz count as a McSame endorsement?
[re=25526]The Dudemeister[/re]: that depends: are the hung ironically or humorously, or straight?
1. Does anyone else get the sense that the media is deliberately trying to create a real horse race so that they will have something to talk about for the next 5 months and in an attempt to justify their desperate need for camera face time?
2. As for the alleged 2012 meteor, there is a more pressing problem. If the Cubs win the world series (for the 1st time in 100 years), do you think the cosmic forces will let there be 2 winners out of Illinois? It did not work in 2004 for Kerry after the Red sox won. So Cubbies, please have the decency to wait until 2012 to finally win one.
[re=25610]raider12[/re]: I don’t really blame them. What else are they gonna report on, the economy?
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