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WAR IS HELL

Lara Logan, Best War Reporter Ever

Give this woman a prize.In an age when most reporters for the American media are timid, pasty, milquetoast mumblers, Lara Logan stands head and balls above the rest. Sure, we’ve seen some stories about her romantical adventures in Iraq’s Green Zone and an exciting brawl in a safe house between two rival suitors — and our only question is, Just two?

Somewhere in heaven, Martha Gellhorn is laughing.

Sure, it’s sad to see Lara Logan’s (very exciting!) private life become the story when she is one of the rare individuals who has actually shown some courage in a war that has made cowards of many of us (media, voters, elected officials, blah blah blah). That said, we find it entirely fitting that she’d want to bone Michael Ware, the sexy Australian with the fucked-up nose.

In conclusion, there is nothing more awesome than war correspondents constantly sexing each other and having fistfights, because that is what Hemingway wanted for America.

Anybody who calls her a whore in the comments is getting their ass banned, forever.

NEWS BABE’S ‘IRAQI TRYST’ [New York Post]


11:21 AM on Thu June 26 2008
By Sara K. Smith
13033 Views

  1. Lara was on the Daily Show recently and she rocked. The woman kicks ass.

  2. Godless Liberal * says at 11:24 am, June 26th, 2008

    She’s hot, not like hot on the grand scale of one to ten, but definitely newsmedia-hot. I’m not saying she’s a whore, but if she were, she’d easily rate four diamonds.

  3. KevoTron says at 11:25 am, June 26th, 2008

    Anybody who calls ME a whore in the comment section… Well… I like dirty talk, let’s get a drink sometime.

  4. nbawriter says at 11:26 am, June 26th, 2008

    Like reporters have had their sex organs removed … please.

    It would be a war crime if a smart, uber-hot woman like her wasn’t being pursued by a million pitched tents.

  5. loudmouthredhead says at 11:27 am, June 26th, 2008

    Seriously? She could do way better. That guy’s nose would poke your eye our if you got in close to him! There must be some other *ahem* attribute that only Ms. Logan knows about to make up for that schnoz…

  6. AngryBlakGuy says at 11:27 am, June 26th, 2008

    …ok ok ok, before I even read the post. I would hit that harder than bottle of Jack on New Years Eve(while at a office party)!!!

  7. loudmouthredhead says at 11:28 am, June 26th, 2008

    Godless Liberal *: Hey, wouldn’t you get in a knock-down drag out fight with screwed-up-nose man to win her over? Cause I sure would..Mee-yow!

  8. Voyou Charmant says at 11:30 am, June 26th, 2008

    Pics or it didn’t happen.

  9. SayItWithWookies says at 11:30 am, June 26th, 2008

    Those eyes cut through me like a hot Sabatier through basil-oregano butter.

  10. Chad San Marino says at 11:31 am, June 26th, 2008

    Let us eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we may die . . . or screw and fight. Either works.

  11. SayItWithWookies says at 11:31 am, June 26th, 2008

    AngryBlakGuy: I’d hit that so hard, the person who pulled me out would become king of England.

  12. Godless Liberal * says at 11:31 am, June 26th, 2008

    loudmouthredhead: Oh, of course. I am not sure what more I could do to his nose in a fight, though.

  13. AngryBlakGuy says at 11:32 am, June 26th, 2008

    loudmouthredhead: …I think its the accent! I use to throw an accent out there back in my sexual harassment days(last weekend) and in the very least the woman wouldn’t call the police on me!

  14. WaldoJeffersHead says at 11:34 am, June 26th, 2008

    loudmouthredhead: Maybe it’s the three-day beard. Some women like the ‘bad boy’ image that conveys. Mine usually looks like a mangy cat though.

  15. RaptorAvatar says at 11:35 am, June 26th, 2008

    What do war correspondents talk about on a date? Like, do they have war stories or do they talk about regular shit? I have to know.

  16. EnBuenOra says at 11:36 am, June 26th, 2008

    I’m starting to wonder if part of this news exposure is not just reaction to her national appearance on the Daily Show, but in fact revenge by CBS against her revelations of their Iraq non-coverage, using gossip & sex as a distraction.

  17. policonoclast says at 11:38 am, June 26th, 2008

    She’s totally a four diamond sluuuuuuuuuut, but a bit of a chameleon. What is she? blonde? brunette?

  18. WadISay says at 11:38 am, June 26th, 2008

    I always wish Lara would end her reports with, “In other news, a certain cub reporter and I had some fine Afghan and put on Rockin’ the Casbah last night.

    loudmouthredhead: I figure the schnoz is, itself, some kind of sexual appendage, but that’s as far as I want to go with it.

  19. AngryBlakGuy says at 11:39 am, June 26th, 2008

    …if Michael Ware is lucky, the ensuing fist fight might have corrected his nose!

  20. nbawriter says at 11:39 am, June 26th, 2008

    When she was on The Daily Show, I had to apologize to my wife for getting an erection from the television screen while sitting next to her.

    It was like I was 13 again, trying desperately to fiddle with that wheel on the 36-channel cable box so the Playboy Channel would be somewhat visible.

  21. Serolf Divad says at 11:39 am, June 26th, 2008

    The Brits have the Royals to fantasize about. I have these guys. Seriously.

  22. I’d like to see her firing a Mk 19 or a .50 cal. GET SOME!

  23. SuperRounder says at 11:40 am, June 26th, 2008

    How has no one been shot over this chick? She’s hot walking down the street in any city, let alone out in the desert where women are few and far between. Those eyes are really really nice. Maybe going to Iraq isn’t such a bad idea after all.

  24. DoctorCulturae says at 11:41 am, June 26th, 2008

    1. a woman who engages in promiscuous sexual intercourse, usually for money; prostitute; harlot; strumpet.
    –verb (used without object)
    2. to act as a whore.
    3. to consort with whores.
    –verb (used with object)
    4. Obsolete. to make a whore of; corrupt; debauch.

    Lara Logan is definitely not a whore. She is a trusted news correspondent for MSM.

    And Ernest Hemingway was a brilliant writer.

  25. WadISay says at 11:42 am, June 26th, 2008

    I would also like to see Lara Logan face off with Dana Perino. I bet it would be like the Coors Light Love Train comin’ through town.

  26. AnnieGetYourFun says at 11:43 am, June 26th, 2008

    Dude, when I refer to Wonkette as “political porn”, I don’t mean that I actually want to be aroused by the coverage. Between this and Tractor Caucus, I’m feeling a little… warm.

  27. Doglessliberal says at 11:44 am, June 26th, 2008

    Ok, this is to risk sounding like Jezebel and being banned, but what the hell? (the folowing is not a criticism of Wonkette, but of of the NY Post. I agree with Wonkette. She is not a whore; she is great).

    Why is it news only when a woman starts getting some? Why is SHE the story and not the men? The whole “babe” thing is just annoying, too. I mean, yeah, she is pretty, but does the media have to diminish her by turning her into a “vixen”. As Our Wonkette noted, this is what foreign correspondents are supposed to do! Go, risk their lives, have sex, move on….men AND women should do this in the finest Hemingwayan tradition. Only because it is a pretty woman does it make news in this titillating way. She is the slutty vixen who breaks up marriages. Sigh. (and I am not one to cry sexism all the time. Really. I roll my eyes at most of the knee jerk whines). I say good for her; go report and have lots of great sex, but why does it have to be reported as if in a high school gossip column?

  28. botlrokit says at 11:45 am, June 26th, 2008

    Martha Gellhorn reports that she’s angry as hell, for finding out there’s a heaven. She’ll file her report on our new Iraqi strumpet, as soon as she’s finished fellating Yul Brynner.

  29. ManchuCandidate says at 11:46 am, June 26th, 2008

    I’d never call Lara a whore. Seriously. Who doesn’t need some sumthang sumthang while covering a mostly fucked up war up close and personal. I’m guessing she needed something to remind her of her humanity of being alive–no different than what I’ve read that a lot of soldiers go thru in a combat zone.

    If she likes to fuck, so goddamned what! Those who do cry “whore” and mean it are typically the biggest moralizing uptight close minded self centered chickenshit motherfuckers who think sex is icky (and mostly because they’re scared most people might wonder about the diapers, ball gags, crotchless wetsuits, animals and other bizzare shit that’s revolving around in the dark places of their horniess.)

    I’d gladly brawl over her.

  30. Doglessliberal says at 11:46 am, June 26th, 2008

    WadISay: Laura v. Dana would be like matching a Mensa chapter against a comatose infant.

  31. nbawriter says at 11:46 am, June 26th, 2008

    Subscribers to the New Yorker: Is the “Maximizing Your Lobster” story about Lara Logan? If so, I might be able to forgive the Terrorist Fist Jab on the front and get a copy.

  32. AngryBlakGuy says at 11:47 am, June 26th, 2008

    …Sara K. Smith has a little bit of eye candy for everyone this morning. You got Scott Kleeb(or Bruce Campbell’s stunt double as I call him) for the ladies and Lara Logan for us horn-dog chauvinists. Lets see if you can complete the trifecta by throwing in a Republican ass-fukking thread!

  33. ForeignSickSpecialist says at 11:47 am, June 26th, 2008

    AngryBlakGuy: I do the same thing. White women love a black man who sexually harrasses them in creole or patoi. But in plain ole ‘mericun English, cops come in less than 2 minutes, shortly after the mob with the noose.

    Jungle Fever. Catch it!

  34. nbawriter says at 11:48 am, June 26th, 2008

    Doglessliberal: Yeah … you’re sounding like Jezebel. Knock it off.

    (Actually, part of what makes her uber-hot is that during the Stewart interview she was clearly a competent and extremely intelligent reporter. That enhances the hotness.)

  35. WIDTAP says at 11:50 am, June 26th, 2008

    Yesterday, CBS announced, without a hint of irony, that she was given a new Washington assignment as chief foreign-affairs correspondent.

    Some things just snark themselves.

  36. Doglessliberal says at 11:50 am, June 26th, 2008

    AngryBlakGuy: There HAS been a dearth of those lately, hasn’t there? No Endless Cummer this year. Sigh.

  37. Doglessliberal says at 11:51 am, June 26th, 2008

    ForeignSickSpecialist: A nice Irish accent works, too. You cannot tell what obscene harassment he is spewing, but it is lovely and musical, so it’s fine!

  38. SayItWithWookies says at 11:52 am, June 26th, 2008

    WadISay: It wouldn’t even be close. In terms of pure wonk-sexiness, LL is at least as hot her looks let on, while Dana Perino would land in the range of, say, a desiccated turnip.

  39. WadISay says at 11:54 am, June 26th, 2008

    Doglessliberal: Plus, Lara totally despises people who do nothing more than select and spin stories out of the middle east to make happy news. This only makes me love her more.

  40. Doglessliberal says at 11:55 am, June 26th, 2008

    nbawriter: I agree she is hot and that is fine, as is the commentary here about doing her every which way. Hey, that is what we come to Wonkette for. What I was objecting to is the ridiculous style of the NY Post article. But maybe I am a bit testy because I was on an hour-long call just now with a twit, whose penis was no doubt microscopic, whose tone and words even started to get to me after a while, and I have a realllly thick skin and am close to impossible to offend.

    But enough of this seriousness. She is hot. And I have heard there’s a big sale on TruckNutz(TM)!

  41. I’d do her.

  42. WhatTheHeck says at 11:55 am, June 26th, 2008

    I was once in-bedded with her on a mission.

    I can only wish.

  43. Doglessliberal says at 11:56 am, June 26th, 2008

    SayItWithWookies: yeah, it wouldn’t even be a mismatch between people playing the same game with diferent skill levels because Dana wouldn’t even know what the game was.

  44. tunamelt says at 11:57 am, June 26th, 2008

    Doglessliberal: In answer to this: Why is it news only when a woman starts getting some? Why is SHE the story and not the men? The whole “babe” thing is just annoying, too. I mean, yeah, she is pretty, but does the media have to diminish her by turning her into a “vixen”., please see this comment: EnBuenOra:

  45. Doglessliberal says at 11:57 am, June 26th, 2008

    WhatTheHeck: hah! I was going to note it gives a new meaning to imbedded!

  46. MadMangosteen says at 11:57 am, June 26th, 2008

    Tales of the love fight first broke on the freerepublic.com in December.

    well by cracky if freerepublic reports it, it’s pretty much guaranteed to be true and not total fucking bullshit!

  47. MoodProcessor says at 11:58 am, June 26th, 2008

    nbawriter: Not to mention, throwing out the MF bomb. She’s not hot, she’s spicy.

  48. Doglessliberal says at 11:59 am, June 26th, 2008

    tunamelt: aha!

  49. ManchuCandidate says at 11:59 am, June 26th, 2008

    EnBuenOra:
    Yup.

  50. AngryBlakGuy says at 12:00 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Doglessliberal: …yeah Im with you on this one. As long as it is between to consenting adults that are being honest with each other then why in the hell should you try and label someone?! Secondly why in the hell is it anyones business other than hers and her partners who she sleeps with?!

  51. thefrontpage says at 12:00 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Lara Logan has to be one of the most beautiful, sexy and hot “reporters” to exist in the past 100 years.

    And now she’s even sexier because she’s had an affair with a married man, caused a divorce, been with at least two other guys overseas, and is now scheduled to work OUT OF THE CBS D.C. OFFICE!

    Hey, Lara, when you get here, there’s about 500 Wonkette Members who would love to buy you a drink! And we mean that in the nicest way, really.

  52. Walter Sobchak says at 12:01 pm, June 26th, 2008

    AngryBlakGuy: Given enough time, shouldn’t every wonkette thread become a Republican ass-fucking thread?

  53. All’s fair in love and war…and in boosting the circulation of a worthless rag of a newspaper in an industry doomed to shrink into nothingness.

  54. Any young woman who can maintain two boyfriends and a husband all while reporting the atrocities of war to a hungry US population has certainly got skillz.

    Are there naked pictures? All for the sake of journalistic curiosity…

  55. Doglessliberal says at 12:04 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Walter Sobchak: yes, it is like entropy.

  56. AnnieGetYourFun says at 12:04 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Doglessliberal, ManchuCandidate: What you said.

    Mind you, I’m kind of prone to whoring myself, and I don’t have any war to cover. I just like boning.

    In other news, The New York Post is beyond pathetic.

  57. KevoTron says at 12:06 pm, June 26th, 2008

    nbawriter: Yeah, intellectuals are sexy. I had my girlfriend quote H.P. Lovecraft and Kafka while we were boning last night. Then we put in some old tapes of American Idol for the Bukkake part of the evening.

  58. AnnieGetYourFun says at 12:07 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Doglessliberal: You know, sometimes I feel sorry for Dana, because retarded people deserve credit for _trying_, you know? But then, I see just how completely arrogant she is, and all sympathy goes out the window.

  59. nyhfrog says at 12:08 pm, June 26th, 2008

    I’m 41 and this is the biggest crush I’ve had since Olivia Newton-John!

    Me Likey Lara Logan!

  60. Neilist says at 12:10 pm, June 26th, 2008

    I’d hit it.

    Ernest would have hit it.

    Heck, Martha would have hit it.

    (Oh, when is she going to interview Tim Russert? It’s been over three days; surely “He” has risen from the dead by now?)

  61. Doglessliberal says at 12:11 pm, June 26th, 2008

    AnnieGetYourFun: well, yeah, boning is good, and I think the need woudl go way up when you were in peril and reporting from a war zone. You know, life affirming and all that good stuff.

  62. Doglessliberal says at 12:12 pm, June 26th, 2008

    AnnieGetYourFun: yeah, the smug thing loses her the cute-feel-symptahy-for-me thing.

  63. WadISay says at 12:12 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Q2: At least you didn’t say, shrivel into a tiny, flaccid and impotent organ, thanks.

  64. SayItWithWookies says at 12:18 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Doglessliberal: It would be like a chess match between Gary Kasparov and the Pomeranian down the street.

  65. Jerk Cade says at 12:19 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Doglessliberal: Oh man, i wud due her evry which way with my microscopik penis, but only because she is a hore and wud like it!

    Also, I am very impressed by her no-nonsense war-reporting.

  66. Cool2Snog says at 12:20 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Whwnever I see a picture of the lovely and brainy Ms Logan, I just want to tilt my head back and make that gargling noise Homer Simpson makes when he thinks of doughnuts.

    Her accent, btw, is a mild Seth Effricken lilt.

  67. nyhfrog says at 12:22 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Hey,

    I’ll put it this way:

    Remember how adults used to tell us to eat everything on our plates because there were starving people in other countries?

    It’s the same with being hot.

    If you’re hot you damn well should be fuckin’ because there are unhot people, like me, who would be fuckin’ if they could.

    I take it as a sign of respect that Lara and Michael…and other hotties are out there fuckin’in a war zone.

    Thank you for your act of respect toward me, Lara. I appreciate it.

    …and if any of you commenters out there are unquestionably hot, get out there and start fuckin’!

    Or risk my wrath.

  68. Oh my God, it’s Red Zuigiber.

  69. Delicious says at 12:24 pm, June 26th, 2008

    “Sexy CBS siren Lara Logan spent her days covering the heat of the Iraq war - but that was nothing compared to the heat of her nights.”

    Where do they hire these writers? Wonkette?

  70. AnnieGetYourFun says at 12:27 pm, June 26th, 2008

    SayItWithWookies: Hey, hey, hey. Pomeranians probably have functioning brain cells.

  71. EarBucket says at 12:27 pm, June 26th, 2008

    That woman could do bad, bad things to me.

  72. Doglessliberal says at 12:29 pm, June 26th, 2008

    nyhfrog: Maybe we can establish a fucking cap and trade? Those who have much could sell some? So say I get some 5 nights a week; for a price, I could sell one of my nights so someone else could get some? This would break down, however, as I would not want to sell any. But maybe some people out there would be more generous.

  73. Doglessliberal says at 12:30 pm, June 26th, 2008

    AnnieGetYourFun: you beat me to it.

  74. Doglessliberal says at 12:31 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Delicious: yeah, you do expect a heaving bosom to show up somewhere in that turgid prose.

  75. Jobbotch says at 12:31 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Lobster maximized.

  76. shortsshortsshorts says at 12:33 pm, June 26th, 2008

    M
    I
    L
    F

    But no kids, so

    Cougar.

  77. EnBuenOra says at 12:33 pm, June 26th, 2008

    By the way, I don’t think Katie Couric should be lecturing anyone on how someone else could harm the interests of CBS News.

    Katie Couric’s takeover of the CBS Evening News led directly to its getting lower ratings than, say, George “Macaca” Allens national telethon for Macaca-Americans.

  78. guerilla-nation says at 12:36 pm, June 26th, 2008

    you can’t spell “whore” without “HERO,” which is exactly what she is to former war correspondents like me who never had anyone but nicaraguan hookers and bob schieffer offering to fuck us.

  79. Mr. Herpes says at 12:36 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Hot? Ms. Logan is hotter than a Mosul alley full of the Sadr militia. She’s hotter than a 240 MG that just ripped off 1,000 rounds. Are kiddin’ me? I’d door-kick ten mosques, waterboard her mother, yank off her K-pot, toss the eye-pro and forced feed that infidel houri my own M4 on full-auto. And then… and then…..okay… sorry. Got carried away with the whole war correspondent thing. No more coffee for me today……

  80. S.Luggo says at 12:39 pm, June 26th, 2008
  81. Delicious says at 12:40 pm, June 26th, 2008

    guerilla-nation: [i]you can’t spell “whore” without “HERO”[/i]

    Wow, I just learned a life lesson on Wonkette.

    Well played, sir.

  82. S.Luggo says at 12:43 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Tawmn: Young? She’s fookin’ 37 and living in fear of uterus drying up.

  83. shortsshortsshorts says at 12:44 pm, June 26th, 2008

    guerilla-nation: I hear Schieffer gave a wicked hummer though.

  84. Mumble Softly says at 12:46 pm, June 26th, 2008

    LARA is way to hot for this war and way to hot for those ugly dudes who were fighting over her.
    She should be with me !!

  85. shortsshortsshorts says at 12:46 pm, June 26th, 2008

    shortsshortsshorts: *gives
    I didn’t know he was working for Couric. How UNUSUAL.

  86. MARCdMan says at 12:46 pm, June 26th, 2008

    She makes me for the 100-year WALNUTS war, if it means more of her reports from the front line in her hot body armour.

  87. S.Luggo says at 12:47 pm, June 26th, 2008
  88. Harvey Birdman says at 12:50 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Yes she’s hot and yes she’s smart (S-M-R-T!). But the coolest thing about the Stewart interview was how real she was. I mean, her advice on how to win over soldiers: “Hey motherfuckers, what’s up?”

  89. populucious says at 12:51 pm, June 26th, 2008

    In conclusion, there is nothing more awesome than war correspondents constantly sexing each other and having fistfights, because that is what Hemingway wanted for America.

    God, if only everyone would consider what Hemingway would want for America before acting. What a righteous place this would be, like Lord of the Flies with weapons and alcohol and angry bulls running down the street. Sweet!

  90. WadISay says at 12:53 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Can you imagine the value of the movie, or maybe made-for-TV, rights to “Teh Lara Logan Story”? I am opening the bidding with a couple of diamonds.

    OK, now I am done thinking about Lara Logan until 10:53 PM tonight.

  91. Lord Humungus says at 12:57 pm, June 26th, 2008

    AnnieGetYourFun: When did White House Press Secretary become a Special Olympics event? Same day the presidency did?

  92. Paultardville says at 1:05 pm, June 26th, 2008

    She should be proud that her sexual trysts are being bandied about while she is still young, unlike that pathetic Barbara Walters who did the attention whore thing by putting it in a book.

  93. Outstando says at 1:08 pm, June 26th, 2008

    loudmouthredhead: His nose isn’t the only thing that bends supernaturally.

  94. Quacker says at 1:20 pm, June 26th, 2008

    What am I supposed to think? Themz look like diamonds to me….

  95. Quacker says at 1:23 pm, June 26th, 2008
  96. Deepthroat says at 1:25 pm, June 26th, 2008

    i swear to the flying spaghetti monster that my co-worker just walked by and at a glance asked me why there was a picture of me on the internets… i am so hot. apparently. She’s not really my type though.

  97. econdave says at 1:29 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Anybody who calls her a whore in the comments is getting their ass banned, forever.

    Can I call her a RILF?

  98. Big Al1317 says at 1:30 pm, June 26th, 2008

    FMA: Right on!! She’s great. She should have her own news show.

  99. Truculent says at 1:34 pm, June 26th, 2008

    nbawriter: Only Washington-based reporters are without genitalia. Others outside the bubble are fully functional. Or so I’ve heard

  100. Big Al1317 says at 1:36 pm, June 26th, 2008

    Doglessliberal: Because we live in a juvenile, repressed society where the collective mind has the maturity of a middle school kid. I bet the male reporters over there are getting laid often but that’s ok. A hot chick getting some? Scandal! Stop the presses!!

  101. jagorev says at 1:45 pm, June 26th, 2008

    This lady has more journalistic integrity than 99% of the American press corps (and 100% of Rupert Murdoch’s employees). I am not kidding.

    Here’s the episode where she was on the Daily Show - awesome interview:

    http://www.thedailyshow.com/full-episodes/index.jhtml?episodeId=173861

  102. sharkytowers says at 1:57 pm, June 26th, 2008
  103. gurukalehuru says at 2:03 pm, June 26th, 2008

    @dogless liberal You mean this isn’t a high school gossip column?
    @walter sobchak usually about 3 comments in

  104. <