Wonkette
Top McCain strategist Charlie Black — the one who lobbies for Iran — dominated this afternoon’s 2-hour news cycle by saying in an interview with Fortune magazine that if we had a terrorist attack right now, “Certainly it would be a big advantage” for John McCain. This line, of course, meant everyone had to feign shock over an accurate political truth, but voiced thus — that if there were a terrorist attack today, Barack Obama would be behind it, potentially hurting his electoral prospects.
After a scolding from McCain, Black has come out with an apology. He “deeply regrets” the comments he doesn’t recall making:
“They were inappropriate,” Black told reporters at a fundraising event, according to a pool report. “I recognize that John McCain has devoted his entire life to protecting his country.”
…And that anything can happen in June.
Black “deeply regrets” terror comment [CNN]
And this is how Cheney will go out- riding a bomb into the Iran desert, Strangelove-style.
(Redacted from printed interview.)
Black: “Of course, we all remember that September 11th happened sometime in September.”
Mr. Black then involuntarily jumped in his chair, his eyes briefly rolled back in his head and a small wet spot formed in his crotch area.
Obama’s strategy now should be to state, “If I am not elected, there will be 1 billion muslims hurtling themselves at the united states with suicide vests on.”
“I recognize that John McCain has devoted his entire life to protecting his country”
Not quoted was:
“by supporting torture, pissing on the constitution, the tyranny of uncorrupted and well regulated financial systems and embrace/suck the cock of his worst enemy to gain the power he so desires.”
Um, if there were a terrorist attack today, wouldn’t it prove that all Bush’s abuses of power and authorization of torture and violations of civil liberties and bombs over Baghdad did absolutely nothing to make our country safer?
One time in his life when he decided to speak the truth. Bad move.
ronaldpagan: Oh, you’re not counting the zillions of terrorist attacks those brilliant policies have prevented.
The Bushies had initially been aiming for peace and prosperity by the end of 2008, but by now they’re just like, “fuck it, if a terrorist attack is the best we can do, let’s give it a try.”
WALNUTS! has a guy named “Black” working for him? Goopers, please just GO AWAY..
Dear Wonkette, this off topic but… can you guys please write a review of Americas favorite zionofascist Bill Kristols column. I don’t want to give him any clicks by reading it online, and I haven’t bought a monday NY Times since he started. But I do like to keep up on what kind of nonsense he spews. And Wonkette seems to summarize him best. Oh yeah, McCain would totally jiz himself for joy if we had a terrorist attack.
SayItWithWookies: and that is what keeps me awake at night, when I can’t pass out from the box-a wine…
ronaldpagan: No silly, it would prove that Bush hasn’t gone far enough with his abuses. Duh! Police state is better than no state, dontcha know?
I really hate Charlie Black for feeding the hopes and dreams of thousands of conspiracy theorists with these remarks. Imagine if we did have another attack in October. The 9/11 truthers would cream their jeans.
My friend Betsy writes for Fortune. I was kind of hoping she did the interview so I could e-mail her and get the scoop. Sadly, it was written by some guy named “David.” Probably a Republican, that David.
Is anybody watching fucking Hardball right now? They just said, un-challanged;”John McCain is the Foriegn Policy Candiate”, WTF? WHAT? Miserable damn MSM…
Cicada: Mr. Pagan, its difficult to make a point when you are always antagonizing people.
FlipOffResearch: Totally concur, I love the Bill Kristol threads! Haven’t read through all of this one, but it’s about that obnoxious MoveOn “John McCain Will Eat Your Babies” ad. Which means I might end up agreeing with Billy a lil bit. Wonkette, can we please have one so we can direct the discussion to the appropriate thread?
Black continued, “Oh yeah, death, dismemberment, huge towers of flaming rubble… People who love McCain love this stuff. when you think about it, John’s comeback in NH happened just after Cloverfield became a big hit. If we could get one of those giant monsters to attack, we could totally win FL, MI, and NJ!”
Black’s head trembled slightly, and then exploded.
ronaldpagan: You would sorta HOPE that that would be the case, but my guess is that there’d be more religion and gun-clinging, and it would just prove that everyone hates the US because of our (remaining) freedom and everyone is also jealous of how pretty we were in high school and never got over it.
Obama > terrorist > terrorism helps McCain
OH MY GOD! EVEN OBAMA WOULDN’T VOTE FOR OBAMA!
apologize?…Charlie Black is just making the republican party wish list public…
its not the 9/ll truthers who would cream in their jeans…
NedPepper: It’s also difficult to make a point when you’re brainwashed…
“They were inappropriate,” Black told reporters at a fundraising event, according to a pool report. “I recognize that John McCain has devoted his entire life to protecting his country.”
This makes my head hurt. They were inappropriate because he sounds like McCain hope there’d be an attack (cuz, you know, he probably would) or because somehow an attack now would represent the failure of John Rambo Walnuts! to have prevcented the attack himself, Jack Bauer style?
Heckofajob Blackie.
NedPepper: I am a girl and you are the poor man’s Tony the Tiger.
SayItWithWookies: Cicada: AnnieGetYourFun: Don’t Bush and his posse always use the fact that there hasn’t been a terrorist attack here since 9/11 to bolster their scary policies? Of course, if there was a terrorist attack they would have no problem doing a 180 and getting back to their favorite game: fearmongering. And people would be stupid enough to lap it up. So sad.
I understand that some people shift their brains into neutral and let their mouths run on. You’ve got it in park there.
Perhaps we’re missing the point.
These war-mongering fascist pigs are displaying a working strategy. Why apologize? This is no lie! shit! There’s probably a demographic spanning the middle section (or “asshole”) of this place that is wrought and ready for the big one. You know, those crazy fucks leftover from the Cold War who still believe the Soviets are infiltrating the water. Something is NOT wrong here.
We NEED to be afraid. Goddamnit. Black probably made the most honest comment in McCain’s campaign so far. With that and “bomb bomb bomb, bomb bomb Iran,” the press will have a field day, but they don’t get the fucking point about anything, ever, that Jesus will be happy when we finally knock those sand-fuckers out once and for all, for Him.
ronaldpagan: It’s called a win-win situation.
Ha. As if there’s anything that can help Losey McSaggyCuntFace.
SayItWithWookies: Also, I don’t think peace and prosperity were ever on the Bush agenda.
But it’s true! I’m sure the republicans would never allow anything bad to happen just to boost McCranky’s chances, but if it DID happen…well, it would be Barry’s fault. I think eveyone could agree on that.
NedPepper: What to solve your own problem, ned. Now either make a useful point or go away forever.
“They were inappropriate,” Black told reporters, “…but it would be a great way to make everyone forget that McCain looks like the Crypt Keeper and has the memory of a gnat.“
This comment is a lot worse than Hillary’s Bobby Kennedy remark, in my opinion. How is dude not fired? I guess McCain can’t just get rid of the only Black on his staff.
Tits_LaRue: Surely you should give the gnat more credit.
shortsshortsshorts: Gnats™: Mostly smarter than John McCain.
shortsshortsshorts: well said…
So, the smart money says that another terr’ist attack on US soil will help McCain?
But the stupid money says it out loud?
OK, now I get it.
“I recognize that John McCain has devoted his entire life to protecting his country.”
Mr. Black continued “So we know that any attack that occurs is all Obama’s fault.”
SayItWithWookies: Bush isn’t responsible for stopping those zillions of attacks. I am. Thanks to my lucky underwear that I haven’t changed since I took a shit in them on September 11, 2001. Sure, I’ve lost my family and friends for some reason, but our country remains safe!
I’m not so sure it would help McCain… You know, there have been two presidents with the initials JM in history, James Madison and James Monroe. Both of them died of natural causes while serving in office.
Canuckledragger: It is obvious that another attack helps McCain, since Bill Clinton’s approach to combating terrorism was to make it a police action. When the World Trade Center was bombed the first time it should have been treated as an act of terror, and act of war. The attack on our embassy, the attacks on our troops in the middle east and surely the attack on the USS Cole were acts of war. Instead of sending in lawyers and FBI agents he should have sent in troops. A weak response only emboldened the radicals. I would ask the question why do the radicals want to kill us?
Don’t give me the canned b.s. about oil we did business with the middle east in peace up until the early 70’s. It was the french and brits that were paying the terrorist price at that time in the way of terror attacks if you recall.
Why do people have to feign shock over a tasteless political truth? Despite being tasteless, it’s also true. Bah. *grump*
…The Shocking Truth! It’s True!…
I don’t suppose there is any way for that “terrorist attack” to involve taking out “President” Bush with a suicide bomber in the middle of one of those “T Ball” games in the Rose Garden.
Just asking.
Hoping, actually.
He fails to point out that it would not benefit McCain if the attack took place in his pants.
ronaldpagan:
Did Cheney make a similar comment back in 2004? Something about how a Kerry presidency would result in another terrorist attack? Every time a Republican shocks me with a tasteless remark like that, I usually end up remembering another Republican who said something similar in the not so distant past.
Then McCain scratches himself on the head, applies a few bandaids, makes a deal to give 300 million to someone (what if it”s a 12-year old from India?) if they invent his special car, all in a desperate attempt to make headlines that will distract from not only THIS Charlie Black goofy gaffe, but also the BBC just reported that his torturers in Vietnam claim he wasn’t really tortured.
NedPepper: “Acts of war,” by definition, can only be committed by nation states. Al-Qaeda is not a nation state. Hence, a “police action” response in the only one apppropriate.
If you wish to attack a country over the 9/11 attacks, the only logical target was
Saudia Arabia, which has been funding an extremist sect of Islam (Wahabism) since your mid-70s.
But we “couldn’t” attack the Saudis, because both parties had been taking their money for years.
Bottom line: Let’s not be stupid by trying to address these issues logically or historically. George Carlin was right: We’re all mindless sheep getting fucked by the wolves.
BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
FlipOffResearch: “Dear Wonkette, this off topic but… can you guys please write a review of Americas favorite zionofascist Bill Kristol’s column.”
“Zionofascist”, what an interesting, interesting melodic term as the Pegster, between doses of Haldol, would say — particularly since — in 20th Century — fascism — a system of commercial and industrial enterprise supported in lock step by the state — one might call it Cheneyism — resulted in the vigorous attempt in Europe to exterminate social baggage: crips, ‘tards, gimps, simps, Seventh Day Adventists, Quakers, Mormons, Jews (devout or secular), gypsies, Catalons, democrats, wimp pacifists, fags, socialists, rebellious Poles, and those troublesome Christians in the German Lutheran Synod who refused to be party to mass murder.
Dickhead. Get your slurs right.
— Catalon
So is McCain gonna pretend he doesn’t know about the efforts in the Houston ship canal towards another terrorist attack, and the gov’t and Houston PD preparations for it? He should be more careful — cell phone records from his lobbyist staff are traceable. If we get our refineries creamed, the price of gasoline goes stratospheric! And McCain’s response will be to nuke Iran, which again, makes the price of gasoline go hyper-stratospheric.
So, Cheney will be like weeping, or something? (He only ejaculates through his unblinking, malevolent eyes; and slowly, while watching his beloved being tortured.)
Tits_LaRue: “Looking like” and “being” the Crypt Keeper are entirely different things. Yet, through his strength of character, McAged has erased the line.
Neilist: And don’t forget, even if Bill Clinton had bombed every Arab he could find, we still would have been attacked because of teh gayez and uppity women and stuff according to McCain’s religious advisers.
Sometimes I wish i didn’t spend such an extraordinary amount of time masturbating in my crawlspace to Matlock. I tend to eat chips whilst caught up in the act, and am forced to emerge from time to time when the salt is transferred from my hand and stings my penis. Seems that as often as this emergence occurs there’s a gleaming piece of obvious bullshit like this story to nurture some powerless handwringing from the left and some monster pantloads for the prisonplanet.com set. It also seems like these derelict McCain waterheads think they can run the 2004 campaign again, and anyone supporting Obama who publicly feigns indignation at such a clumsy shit-missile as this deserves to be buried alive in the Carhartt Kerry’s had on a hanger for the past four years. Does the GOP wish for an attack to bolster their sad credentials in a hostile election year? Possibly. Does McCain want a couple of news cycles devoted to the bloody shirt his ilk have been shamelessly waving for 7 years. even hypothetically? Definitely.
Neilist: Yes, acts of war are committed by nation states, however, we are out of the box here and must resort to extraordinary measures. Holding entire nations responsible for the acts of native terrorists would certainly get the attention of that nations governing bodies. It worked in the military for centuries, someone screws up and all are held responsible and all pay the price.
In an act of brazen one-upsmanship, Black will engineer a space shuttle highjacking in which Obama voters commandeer the Atlantis brandishing voter ID cards sharpened to a knife’s edge and ram it into the Space Station, thus saving the international community the trouble of removing the astebestos by environmentally acceptable means.
Oh, forgot to mention the date of the attack: 10/12/08. Since you now know it’s going to happen, you can’t claim to be surprised when it does. But then, of course, that means that it definitely won’t happen after all, which will make a ¡REALLY BIG SURPRISE!
it
ronaldpagan: What?! Hell yes they were! Just because they never said anything about them doesn’t mean they weren’t important. Though in reality I’m just glad I got teh internetz back again since Saturday when my place was struck by lightning. Not that I posted from work after that — but — um — I’m glad the tubes is still around too.
NedPepper: So foreign policy is a third grade classroom now. I don’t care who wrote those curse words on the chalkboard, you all miss recess.
NedPepper: So you concur, we should have attacked the Saudi’s then? Or perhaps had we not elected, (not ME), an incurious fratboy as our President, he would have been less interested in “clearing brush” and actually READ the NIE that was presented to him in Sept of 2001?
When the Madrid train bombing happened, I thought it was a desperate, last-ditch attempt on the part of the pro-Bush guy to stay in power. If it was, it backfired. Hard to predict how the mob will react.
for the record, I’m one of those 9/11 truther types. My money’s on Larry Silverstein for the insurance, aided and abetted by the AIPAC and the PNAC, represented by Cheney, Rumsfeld and Wolfowitz.
SayItWithWookies:
Bush and Peace, you say? When it happens, there will be cameras, music, all the correct lighting and make-up!
Bush, having spent his 7 years in office antagonizing the Axis of Evil to become a self-fulfulling prophecy, plans to leave office with a big spectacular pomp and circumstance rapprochement with Kim Jong-il, so that their mugs will be all over the media and the neocons can say, well, at least 1 out of 3 has been won. Maybe they will do the same with Iran too.
The North Korea thing happens to be the same way that Clinton planned to leave office, but because of the Monica deal he had to send Madeleine over for the fireworks, festivities and fanfare instead. I think Bushies are maneuvering to do it with all the correct cameras and characters in place.
freakishlystrong: I agree, the position would be or should be if a nations population aids and abets terror and in the saudi case finances terror there will be a harsh price to pay. I have spent time in this region and quite frankly, the only thing these people understand is power and the fear of that power directed at them and their interests.