Wonkette
Here’s a new ad for Minnesota Sen. Norm Coleman, who by all accounts should be losing his re-election bid this year but will win because the Democrats have nominated an unfunny hack comedian, Al Franken, to challenge him. None of this changes the fact that this ad is grating on all the usual levels, but there’s a special terrible twist in addition!
Some Liberals in Minnesota think that his hot wife, Laurie Coleman, has been cropped into the video. This would make sense, since his wife lives in Los Angeles and wants to be a Movie Star, or at least the filet of home gadget teevee commercial actresses. The Coleman campaign has called this a “left-wing, liberal” conspiracy theory, noting that Laurie Coleman is in the kitchen at all times, making pies for her Family Values Husband.
Laurie Coleman edited into her husband’s ad? [MN Blue]
Coleman ad: it’s real [TwinCities.com]
Hey Norm, when you take out the trash, jump in the can and stay there.
so his special interest is pussy?! shocking!
Clearly they’re both in the pocket of Big Coffee, however.
Al Franken: Case in point for the argument that you shouldn’t vote for a jack-ass just because he shares your political “-ism”
Norm Coleman hates George Bush as much as you do! Honest!
Didn’t know that Blond politician wives were a built in accessory for countertops. If I were Norm, I’d want a newer model.
She’s not in that kitchen. You can really tell at the wide angle shot. She’s not in the same plane of perspective. Either that or she shrunk while the commercial was being made.
Dude, I fucking heart Al Franken. He’s shorter than me. Those tidbits, while not related, matter to me.
tonashideska: Ha-ha-ha…plop!
um, yeah. if you’re going to try to fight franken on the funny front, you’re going to have to try harder. probably not a lot harder. but a bit harder.
She’s either in front of a green screen, or it’s the crappiest lighting job I’ve ever seen.
What’s more disturbing is when he throws out that dead hooker at the end.
You can tell that she’s actually in that picture because if you look carefully you can tell that the light shining off the plastic apple reflects directly back at her luminescent ass.
She could have at least plugged her product in the video.
Norm: “Sorry, honey. No time for breakfast. I have to go save Minnesota from Al Franken.”
Laurie: “Okay, sweetie. But surely you have time for some Blow & Go!”
Now we have Pottery Barn elitist Mediums doing commercials for their politically ambitious husbands.
Let’s get to what’s really important: she’s not as hot as I remember.
Okay, I’d definitely hit that; but Norm Coleman? Fuck, the guy’s a retard posing as an autist.
GIJoeIce:
I was wondering what that *THUNK* was.
AnnieGetYourFun: i agree. short is good. and “why not me?” is pretty damn funny.
Should take Coleman all of two minutes to release an outtake or a picture of the two of them during the filming of this. Maybe they haven’t cause they didn’t want to have to explain the presence of the fluffer. Of course these things are all staged (both the ads and the marriages), so it really doesn’t matter.
Surprising Coleman has married such an intellectual… I mean she can talk and hold a cup at the same time!
She was clearly edited into the video, which raises the question of just who the hell was Norm talking to when he agreed to take out the trash? My guess is, his mother.
El Bombastico: Yeah, but you and I both know you’d still hit that. And so would I.
What was REALLY in that bag of trash?
Cash? Dirty diapers? baby kittens?
He is a Republican, after all.
Stuart Smalley for teh winz.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZclWlNq6QcY
that’s a kitchen tailor made for arugula and pomegranate.
Aren’t those the same techniques they used to make Gandalf look so much larger than Bilbo in the kitchen of BagEnd? There’s nothing they can’t do with special effects.
flyingspaghettimonster: Except make Coleman look intelligent.
what is up with that MUSIC!
ThreeFingersNeat: Oh, no doubt. I mean, I’m a freak. I’d hit Don Young’s wife. Ok, must leave Internet now.
Where’s Gordon Ramsay when you need him?
I met good old Norm once. He shook my hand, said “Nice to meet ya,” and then creeped me out. He did the shake hand while winking thing, with a barely perceptible click from his mouth.
I felt a little bit dirtier after that encounter… and like he wanted to sell me a used car.
What kind of senator touches his own garbage? Gross.
Q: Norm, would you take out the trash?
A: You mean like I did when we were dating, you trollope?
Yes, not in the video. No, I would not hit that. Something about the eyeliner. Evil eyeliner. Not sure…danger sense…tingling.
Does his wife exist in/on, an only slightly, different dimension or physical plain? One where her angle and size, with relation to the shot, can distort and shift at will? She is a fucking witch! BURN HER ALIVE.
Also,I would totally do her.
Heidi Montag is so fake looking.
She wasn’t edited in to the commercial. The Colemans have a kitchen that is 100 feet long.
Laurie has jowls like the original Richard J. Daley.
http://photos.imageevent.com/deltaforce/daley/DALEY.jpg
She looks like Tori Spelling.
And not in a good way!
Casual, yet trampy. http://wizbangblog.com/images/lauriecoleman.jpg But here is the rub: how many whore diamonds?
Gee, I think this looks like the work of the same people who did David Vitter’s teevee ads in 2004:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8y2cI7tyjVg
I guess it’s only a matter of time before the DC Madame files on Coleman come to light…
Uncle Al:
Is there any good way to look like Tori Spelling?
obfuscator: I don’t think so. Does that mean the joke didn’t work?
How long until Al Franken does a parody of this ad? Time to call in some favors from his SNL days.
Also, Al Franken is an unfunny douche who should never be elected to the U.S. Senate. If Minnesota wants to elect wrestlers and comedians, they should stick to their state government.
True story. I dated a girl who worked for the law firm that supported Norm when he first ran for the senate. Apparently they payed him as an attorney even though all he was doing was running his campaign. My date also said that all the attorneys in the firm were cheating on their wives and she was kind of getting tired of being hit on. Good old family values.
RobPetrified: bmannes: GIJoeIce: I’m afraid its much, much worse than that.
You can hear by the faint clinking sound that trash bag was full of aluminum cans that should have gone in the recycling bin instead!
Norm Coleman’s Campaign Slogan:
Don’t Blame Me! My wife makes all of my shitty decisions!
She really should be fired.
Lascauxcaveman: So Norm Coleman hates the environment? Or does he just really, really like aluminum mines?
That is the worst video edit job I have ever seen.
I agree, that kitchen is far too pristine to have been recently inhabited. (I suspect that even the coffee—assuming there was in fact java in that those mugs—did was not made insitu.)
Nevertheless, my dear GIJoeIce, any DECENT American with any self respect does not recycle, not REALLY.
They should paint in his kids, too. To show that his pecker works. This is very important to Family Values voters.
also…she looks like Ellen’s older, less-successful sister
“These left-wing, liberal, Al Franken bloggers are as goofy a bunch as I’ve ever seen,” the campaign’s spokesperson said. “They’ve spent the entire morning concocting a conspiracy theory, wasting valuable bandwidth on the Internet.”
How many more electrons must die needlessly?
Have some respect, Wonkette. Al Franken is a five-time Emmy winner. He was creating comic genius back when you were still a load of dick snot in your father’s loins.
Jewdishoowary Square: So Norm Coleman hates the environment?
No! It means he hates the Boy Scouts. Hates ‘em enough that he won’t even donate his cans. Which means he’s not gay enough to be a real Repub which = Franken Landslide 2008.
Which is fine with me, I heart Al Franken from his SNL days. Even Stuart Smalley was funny sometimes, but mostly the other stuff. His book on Rush Limbaugh was pretty funny too.
Damn you Coleman! Now they’re all going to want us to take out the trash!
Norm Butt-holeman, you’re not smart enuf. You’re not good enuf. And doggone it, nobody likes you except the flies hovering around that trash can. And you were Bush’s Number One Buttboy. Your wife just couldn’t say it or you’d beat her again.
This is really creepy… 2 jerks 1 cup.
It says a lot in Al’s favor that he has exactly zero semi-literate cranks leaping to his defense here.
I guess I’ll have to take the bullet. Al Franken is funny and smart, will probably win and be a pretty good senator, and you all suck. Nyeah.
If Al Franken can’t profit from this kind of advertising fuckup, even in Minnesota, anyone can’t.
One other thing. Laurie might have a secret “tell” there by the way she says “senators” like “sun-a-tors” like she is about ready to say “son-of-a-bitch.”
OK, maybe it’s just me.
Oh she has some seriously bad hair.
Lazy Media:
You’re right, count me as a semi-literate crank in his camp. He deserves support.
Lazy Media: AL is damn good, fair and balanced, funny, mischievous, serious, smart; hey, I’ve said it on Wonkette B4 but not this thread. Al stood up to big bad bullshitty Bush right from the get-go. No waiting for Katrina and the rest of the crowd to say “oops, mistake.”
Coleman voted against the Bush Tax Cuts?!?
Grab the car keys, hun, we’re drivin’ this thing all the way to Victorytown!
GIJoeIce: Dead GAY hooker, you mean.
Get the details correct, Joe. Otherwise, COBRA will WIN.
Coleman kinda looks like Matt Damon, if Matt Damon was old and an asshole and hated teh gayz
Yeah she’s green screened in there. Unfortunately I’m paid to know this kind of thing. The only thing she’s got going for her is that the backdrop is of a higher quality than the one McCain used to posit his theory of what constitutes “change you can believe in.” However, in the long run this ad helps Coleman, as his supporters would feel insulted by the implication that they were somehow being asked to believe that Norm Coleman’s wife can stand to be in the same room with him. Running an ad into which his own wife has obviously been composited using state of the art software is a much more forthright appeal to the sensibilities of his constituents.
Laurie Coleman’s hot! Is she doing porn in L.A.? We’d buy that for a dollar!
Norm’s bad, but Al is a terrible candidate. For a guy who was incredibly funny on TV, he’s awful in person. Also, it looks like Jesse Ventura will be getting in to the race (and no, that’s not a joke), so this one is totally up in the air.
I was in Laurie’s acting class in Hollywood back in 2002. No one had any clue she was married to Norm Coleman until he won his Senate seat and she dropped out suddenly to go play his wife. We thought it was a joke until there she was a couple days later on tv by his side as if they loved each other. They had been living apart for years. Their marriage is a complete sham.
She never wore a wedding ring, and never spoke of a husband. Ever. We all assumed she was single; especially since she was flirtatious with the guys in the class (had she not been so much older than myself, I could have, and would have; in a word, she was horny — that’s all I’m gonna say). She was as wooden as one would expect a model to be — emotionless and aloof, there because she had money and free time; i.e., a serious actor’s worst nightmare if you had the misfortune of having to do a scene with her.