Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal, the Indian street urchin who is also somehow a Mexican Catholic exorcist, is 36-years-old and supposedly “beloved” by his backward state, for being charismatic and Strong. He has been a governor for literally -2 hours. The state has chosen this moment to start hating him, for reneging on a campaign pledge in a comical fashion that marks the birth of a new, iconic American Failure.
It’s extremely simple: on the campaign trail, Jindal promised to veto any bill in which legislators raise their own pay, because there are only four dollars total in the all of Louisiana and they must be spent on Gas. Now both houses of the state legislature have passed a bill to raise their salaries from $16,800 to $37,500. The bill is sitting on Jindal’s desk. He has his veto pen. But he just. can’t. do it!
He has until July 8 to veto the bill or it becomes law. They are calling it the “20-day death march” in Louisiana, which is kind of funny. Jindal is such a loser, too, that he keeps asking the legislature to consider changing its mind. Obviously the legislature doesn’t give a shit.
Oh man, just look at him squirm:
“There is still time in this session and I strongly encourage them to reverse what they’ve done, to reconsider what they’ve done,” Jindal said. “I strongly recommend to individual legislators that they do not accept the pay increase. I think it is a mistake. I think it’s wrong. Again, I think the amount is excessive.”
Jindal said the average Louisiana citizen is not in line for a doubling in salary, and so the Legislature should not be either. He said any pay raise should take effect only after the next election. But he repeated his pledge not to veto the bill.
“We strongly oppose it, but we don’t want to give anybody any excuse to slow down the reforms that are so important to the people of Louisiana,” Jindal said. “But I strongly encourage the Legislature — they still have days left until Monday’s end of session — I strongly encourage them to undo what they’ve done.”
If nothing changes by July 7, expect Jindal to bring out the ol’ Exorcism kit from college and run around the state capitol building sprinkling magical Jesus water on those bullies, like a clown.