Wonkette
With all this talk about Chris Dodd and Kent Conrad getting SWEETHEART MORTGAGE DEALS giving them literally fractions of a percentage point off their mortgage interest and fees, it’s instructive to find out how many of America’s senators even have mortgages. A shocking number do not, which means they are either living in cardboard boxes like 99% of their bankrupted constituents, or they paid off their houses in 1957, back when John McCain was running for his first term. Find out what Politico’s intrepid researchers dug up, after the jump.
Let’s see here…Barbara Boxer had TWO mortgages through Countrywide, America’s Subprime Villain, but paid them off two years ago. Fat Cat Hillary Clinton has a loan through Citibank for her house in New York but owns her DC digs outright. Carl Levin lives under a hill in a snuggly little cave with a perfectly round door. Arlen Specter sleeps in a ditch.
So yeah, pretty much what you’d expect.
Mortgage Loans - Senate [Politico]
…John Boehner lives in spray tanning salon.
…Joe Liebermnan lives in John McCain’s lower colon!
Dennis Kucinich owns a charming home dug into the side of a hill, and all its doors are round and tiny.
Lindsey Graham just kind of sleeps in the locker room at the nearest YMCA.
Senator Akakacaca from Alaska? IGLOO.
Chuck Schumer lives in the Big Brother house, where he can be sure that he is always in front of a camera.
RuperttheBear: Akaka…isnt he from Hawai’i?
RuperttheBear: Akaka’s from Hawaii, silly. He lives in paradise.
Only the richest mo-fo’s in the country get to be in congress. And if you’re a rich mo-fo, you get good mortgage rates. Because of all that sacrifice, they get free health care and a pension for LIFE. Seems fair…
Does Mitch McConnell live in a dark tower-like structure? Does it perchance have a giant, flaming eyeball on the top?
These people better start shacking up in old missle silos when more and more average citizens have nothing to lose.
Remember - Hobo queens are crowned; hobo kings are found.
Oh, well, it is a real shame we don’t pay our rep’s enough to afford a mortgage. Raises are called for, I guess. At least Ms. Boxer was able to finally pay hers off after 30 years…I’m sorry, her HUSBAND was able to pay it off…you know, because she’s a girl, and they are always hitting their heads on that glass coffee table, or desk, or whatever it is that is holding them down. And I swear to god, that guy looks just like my high school art teacher! (Same hand gestures and everything!)
MathewBrooks: Jewdishoowary Square: He’s from Alaska . . . in his mind!
And I haven’t had coffee and am spastic. Meas culpa
John McCain lives in a bamboo cage adjacent to the National Zoo, where he entertains his guests with PTSD flashbacks and games of Russian roulette.
Dat der foto of da Paultard got me a wonderin’ how Paulville mortages are doin” (OK, still on topic I hope.)
And then speakin’ of subprimes and mortgages and such, it seems we haven’t been payin’ enuf attention to how the foreigns media are portrayin’ all this; why, not long ago yonder, even the UK Guardian was a quotin’ Wonkette’s take on Paulville, and then a few days ago, Economist offers this li’l gem on yers Yankee housing habits:
“Americans move house often, usually for practical reasons. Before choosing a new neighbourhood, they drive around it. They notice whether it has gun shops, evangelical churches and “W” bumper stickers, or yoga classes and organic fruit shops. Perhaps unconsciously, they are drawn to places where they expect to fit in.”
PeteJayhawk v2.0: http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9905E7DF1638F936A15752C0A9629C8B63
But which Senator is that in the photo?
He really got that blunt stuck to his lip.
Darehead: Source of above quote:
http://www.economist.com/world/na/displaystory.cfm?story_id=11581447
RuperttheBear: I had no idea WALNUTS died today. This is terrible news.
Brutus Harlot: It’s not a Senator, it’s Angry Bill Clinton! The fund raising is drying up.
Servo: …I actually saw a documentary a few year back about someone who turned an Atlas(maybe Titan) underground missile silo into a fully furnished home. It was actually very nice, once you got past the 3 foot thick blast doors. It kinda had that super-villain secret hideout kind of feel(and who wouldn’t want one of those)!
Brutus Harlot: It’s aspiring hopeful Jesse Ventura?
I’m sure he smells like he uses hot dog water for deodorant.
Obvioiusly, that socialist Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-VT) has a mortgage from a credit union. I always credit unions were part of a Soviet plot to overthrow American capitalism
The person in the photo isn’t a senator at all…its Michelle Bachman.
Larry Craig lives in shoe box on the tarmac at the airport.
Not_So_Much: I think he rents a room there from Dick Cheney
AngryBlakGuy:
One can never completely hide from Janet Reno.
jagorev: That should be “always knew credit unions were part of a Soviet plot…”, dipshit.
Kay Bailey Huthison lives in a Circle K in Houston where various Christian conservatives stand around her and cover her with love.
AngryBlakGuy: “Full House?” Ya I loved that episode.
Ted Stevens lives in a Big Truck.
Brutus Harlot: The mouseover text reveals all.
That wasn’t nice to take a picture of Kitty without her makeup. And she never got to be a senator……no wonder she’s flipping you off.
Is that Jim Ignatowski?
Godless Liberal *: it’s quite funny when Mrs. Kucinich hits her head on the doorframes, light fixtures etc.
It looks like he’s actually regurgitating the cigarette.
I would have assumed it was Tom Tancredo, actually.
obfuscator:
I love the word ‘actually’.
bitchincamaro: Not true. He has a room at the Y.
obfuscator: http://ec1.images-amazon.com/images/P/B000002UD7.01._SCLZZZZZZZ_.jpg
SayItWithWookies: ROFLMFAO
Sara K. Smith: Thank you. I feel oddly fulfilled now.
John Kerry doesn’t have a home, he just windsurfs all day, every day, when he’s not in the Senate.
John Kerry lives in a ketchup bottle with a sail on it.
graceless: Sorry, that IS a senator–it’s the unairbrushed original of the photo gracing the cover of New York magazine’s latest issue.
Jim Webb lives in a shoe.
Apparently a bunch of current and former U.S. Senators and Reps have a house together in Dewey Beach, too. Among the group is Barney Frank, Mark Foley, Don Sherwood, Kent Conrad, Ted Stevens, William Jefferson, Chris Dodd, that New York Fissella guy or whatever his name is, and, for some reason, Eliot Spitzer.
Lots of late-night pizza orders and screaming in the middle of the night.
Apparently huge crowds from the Rusty Rudder and the Starboard head over their many weekends during the summer.
“there” sted “their.” Geez.
You know, true hobos may live on freight trains, but they are men of honor and dignity. Could Wonkette PLEASE stop associating the pond scum that accumulates in the Senate and House of Representatives with the noble hobo?
thefrontpage: Was that William Jefferson or William Jefferson Clinton?
RuperttheBear: Whatever. He was no Joey Stink-eye Smiles.
Robert Byrd lives on a glorious plantation surrounded by his singing mulatto slavechildren.
So, if you decline to name the mortgage company it probably means it was Pauly Walnuts from some place in New Jersey.
Lautenberg has a mansion on a bluff on Martha’s Vineyard, Kerry’s wife has some shiny digs on Nantucket and, of course, there is that Irish, white trash colony in Hyannis.
Godless Liberal *: Actually, Kucinich has a 100-acre ranch in the Land of Make Believe.
John Cornyn lives in sin in an underground lair with teenage ninja box turtles.
Oops, forgot the link to John Cornyn’s box turtles.
There are like a dozen GOP congresscritters/Senators who live in a Capitol Hill flophouse(s) owned by that Fellowship (Hitlers-for-Jesus) cult.
thefrontpage:
Aren’t Schumer and Durbin roomies also?
The man in the picture, demonstrating how George Will types, decided he would not clean up until he had read everything in the media about Tim Russert’s sudden death. Current projections are that he will shave sometime in 2011 and begin to taper off on Thorazine treatments the following year.
My eyes are repeatedly drawn to the hobo pic because I can empathize completely. There have been times when my inner hobo dances around in my skull and screams obscenities while giving profligate fingers with a 3/4 smoked cig hanging out of its mouth (even though I don’t smoke). It’s positively Jungian.
I love it that one of y’all visits fuckoff.com.
Thomas: That’s you? Wow, sorry ’bout that, dude.
Ted Stevens lives in a 200-bedroom mansion in Second Life.