Wonkette
Aside from John McCain, no person or organization cares as much about global warming as the fine folks operating Washington D.C.’s Metro system, which is doing heavy business this time of year shuttling fannypacked tourist families to historical locations that promise to disappoint. That’s on top of the many “Regulars” who take the Metro to work and back daily — not because they want to avoid traffic, but because they want to reduce carbon emissions! According to this new Metro ad, the “average Regular” of this sort is a fat, stomping black lady with a truck who leaves Bigfoot-sized tar footprints all over her ghetto except when she’s sitting on a Metro train, serenaded by birds. [YouTube]
DUMB METRO
Since when does Gwen Ifill ride the Metro?
I’m surprised she didn’t get a ticket for littering all of those footprints.
My experience on any sort of Metro does not involve singing birds, except on SFMUNI, which is beautiful and perfect and smells of rain drops, glistening in a morning sun.
And also remember to not throw the chicken bones and watermelon rinds on the floor of the car.
I call bullshit. It’s rush hour and there are seats available at Metro Center? Please!
I do not believe that lady drives a pickup truck.
The tourists love the Metro, especially when they ask the attendant to help with the incomprehensible farecard machines, and the attendant ignores them for as long as possible and finally scares them away with hostile looks and mumbled scary-sounding replies.
The Metro has a very strong union. I once watched 3 metro employees try to fix a light fixture. One guy stood on a ladder staring at the light fixture, and the other two held the ladder. Every morning I’d see them as I passed by on my commute. After about 2 weeks, they gave up.
stankfest:
yea, right?
Maybe I am losing it but that did strike me as racist. Something about the shape of the footprints
and that lady was miscast for that truck.
I think I dated her in college and have the large, black stains on my sheets to prove it.
Mammy!!
I just want to know who produced it — actually manages to look worse than most local cable ads.
I remember my last adventures on the DC metro. Heckled by anti-Cheney Christmas carolers, freezing to death at the train station in February and overhearing an issue with some dude mooning people with his wang. Fun times.
That last graphic reminds me of the time I took a shit in the middle of a gas station island….oh, wait…it doesn’t say “take a dump at the pump???”
valencia: My bad!! I read it “Metro Urges Black Ladies To Stop Leaving Big Tar Babies Everywhere.”
The last time I rode the Metro, a huge, sweaty stranger sat down next to me and started making small talk about the weather. This naturally progressed to him telling me that when it starts getting hot, the women start actin’ all crazy, and that’s when they start getting raped. Then he chuckled knowingly. Singing birds, indeed.
Isn’t tar flammable? Would that explain Metro’s catastrophic fires last week?
I can’t get video at work, can someone give me a blow by blow?
Those tiny footprints at the end creep me out. What, someone’s offering Chinese footbinding services at the entrance to the station?
And then she sings “Zip-a-dee-doo-dah” all the way to her destination.
freakishlystrong: Sorry, someone was talking to me..(actually TALKING! but they interrupted by train of thought, selfish bastard co-worker), it’s just that the headline there is fuckin’ funny in a weird way…
freakishlystrong: it’s a psa that attempts to humrously show that you leave big footprints when you drive your big ass truck and little footprints when you take metro. the woman in it is a middle aged black lady who looks horribly out of place in her big ass truck nut having pickup and makes big black footprints and rumbling sounds when crossing the parking lot…once she enters the metro station, she leaves tiny little footprints and birds are chirping in the background. overall, kinda lame…
grrrr..MY
…a black woman leaving giant tar foot prints, as she get onto the the underground railroad; all the while racist birds attempt to give away her location! Damn whitey!!!
Paste magazine has a pretty interesting article this month about the great-great-great grandson of the guy who created Uncle Remus, and therefore, racism.
http://www.bluetoad.com/publisher/pastemag/Paste_Magazine/issue6/magazine.php?page=59
The real (hidden) message here from Metro: “big sale on Truck Nutz.”
Ah Fannypacks, I love that indicator of the hinterlands.
I especially love them in England. Especially if some guy named Randall is wearing one and trying to borrow a cigarette.
I love your fanny-pack Randy but I can’t let you bum a fag.
In England, they are “bum bags”, because a “fanny” is a cooch.
Well, it’s unlikely that she drives that truck. But the good news is Aretha sure has lost a lot of weight!
There should be a counter-ad
“Ride Metro,
Get SARS.”
“But I’se Nebba Seen n Elephant Fly”
The last time I rode Metro rail, an escapee from the asylum wanted to leave me (and others) as a stain on the Metro tracks.
I escaped to another car, but could still hear the deranged man ranting, not birds singing.
I decided A big footprint is better than a small dead one.
thatswhatshesaid: Ah, the elusive morbedis assholus. A rare specimen indeed. Flightless, but with an amazing vocal range.
The hilarious part about this ad is that Metro keeps raising the cost of ridership. Pretty much everybpody that has an option rides the bus now. A roundtrip ticket from Gallery Place (7th Street) to Georgia Ave in Wheaton (suburbana Maryland) - a distance of about 10 miles - now costs you about $7 with correct change.
Even Hummers get 14 miles per gallon in city.
WIDTAP: Wait, that’s Metro Center? I’m going to tranfer at Metro Center rather than Ggallery Place if Metro Center looks like that.
The quality on that is so bad it looks like it was made by the same people that made that “Hillary in the House” video.
dxh: “Mooning with his wang?” Do you mean “flashing,” or was he that skilled at tucking?
she’s not fat
Borat: makes me think of:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qNIszeXRTOU
oh and that is the worst ad i’ve ever seen.
Metros for Jethros! But where do you put your truck nutz on the Metro?
vicuna: My mistake. I thought it meant cunt. Cherry-o mate
problemwithcaring: As I recall, the cost of ridership went up for the first time in a few years. It’s not like they’re raising it every month.
With my commute, the cost of driving is almost equal to the cost of riding metro thanks to the rising gas prices, and I’m betting that by the end of the summer it will become cheaper for me to continue to take Metro.
InsidiousTuna: Don’t worry, that’s not Metro Center.
ladymacbeth: Cheers. Luv it - will have to see the whole movie, but I prefer the Flemish spelling of Brugge
ladymacbeth: I’m reminded of when a few years ago people that size that had to start buying 2 seats to fit themselves on an airline. They were outraged. OUTRAGED!