The biggest investigative report during the endless Pennsylvania primary run-up involved Barack Obama bowling with some Bitters and Sen. Bob Casey, where he rolled a pathetic 37. He was so distraught over his big city fairy’s performance that he stopped campaigning altogether and played basketball — at which he excels — instead. But the man has demons, demons that require a focused purging, and that is why he now plans on destroying the White House bowling alley and replacing it with a court for his game, which, again, is basketball.
There is still no explanation for why he was talking to Jimmy Kimmel:
“I hear there’s a bowling alley and obviously that hasn’t gone too well,” Obama told comic Jimmy Kimmel in a satellite interview from Philadelphia on Sunday. “So we’re getting rid of the bowling alley and replacing it with a basketball court in the White House.”
And then Patti Solis Doyle used campaign money to buy 700 basketballs and 900 pairs of gym shorts for her new boss.