Wonkette
Your Wonkette is in Vanity Fair (the one with the cover breasts of, let’s see, yes, Angelina Jolie), in this blog chart thing showing various levels of boredom/earnestness of the famous blogs of the Internet. We did not realize our headlines were so funny, or that our articles weren’t. Anyway, this just goes to show it doesn’t take much to be America’s Wittiest Political Blog. [Vanity Fair]
ANGELINA JOLIE'S BREASTS
Vanity Fair Insults/Praises Wonkette
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Meh. They’re both funny.
Wonkette’s made reading the internet fun again.
Vanity Fair: Like the Free Republic, a complete waste of pagehits, but still a leading killer of trees.
Well Fuck that article shit, what about the commenters?
That “Blogopticon” is fucked. It needs a whole “surprise buttsecs” axis. Then it needs to put Michelle Malkin down in the newly formed “scurrilous opinion surprise buttsecs” quadrant.
Yeah. Awesome.
Like a true elitist, this means nothing to me since it wasn’t from the New Yorker.
Inadequate Blackmail: Word.
We are so elite that we cold motherfucking *write* the New Yorker, at night, as a joke.
Congratulations, Wonkette, on being more earnest and less opinionated than Perez Hilton!
Clearly Wonkette needs more Tom Ford.
Ken Layne: Please do so, then. The New Yorker could certainly use a little more assfucking humor. Couldn’t we all?
Don’t feel bad, Wonkette, they probably didn’t even read the articles.
Is it just me or does that blog chart thing look a lot like a two dimensional version of the Onion’s Tolerability Index?
To put their sense of humor in perspective, they called Andrew Sullivan “Colbert-esque.”
I’m confused, my blog was not listed - are they trying to tell me that horse racing is not at the forefront of public consciousness? Did we not destroy Hillary?
Nobody ever wants to sleep with the witty ones. At least you know they aren’t trying to get in your pants.
Oh? Is it our fault they haven’t learned to read between the lines?! That’s where the choice material is, Vanity Fair! Maybe if you bend over and pucker up, we’ll send you a decoder ring.
shit…that article is not good news.
everybody…put out the lights and stop the funny business
for a week or so. start cribbing from the nyt blogs, like
this actual example:
Hmmm. How does one come up with a plausible reason to decline a
town hall meeting, or, a debate for that matter, addressing the
critical issues that America is facing today? Especially, when
this “get together” blitzfrancis whatits cranston.
then, when they leave, go back to normal…not normal normal. you
know what i mean.
Shouldn’t that headline have read, “Assholes From Vanity Fair Insult/Praise Wonkette”?
tunamelt: But we do want to get in their’s, right? Or at least watch?
SayItWithWookies: I believe that’s “Claudette-Colbert-esque.”
Wonkette has articles? I just look at the pictures while I masturbate.
The article is complete parody. Wonkette’s headlines are not funny, they are informative. If not for Wonkette, I would have never known that Angelina Jolie has breasts.
It’s a backhanded compliment, as Wonkette has to share billing with nearby neighbor Rocketboom, which is perhaps the most singularly unfunny human endeavor ever intended to be funny. Curvaceousness has it’s uses, but eliciting laughter is not one of them.
Less newsy than Gawker? Since when is gossip about Mario Lopez newsworthy? But more scurrilous than Drudge Report?
gjdodger: Look at the alt text. Perfect.
tunamelt: If no one wants to sleep with the witty ones, then why can’t I get laid?
Have they no standards? Wait, this is VF we’re talking about, nevermind.
ThreeFingersNeat: Do you have an STI?
Vanity Fair, the only magazine Eric Feltner reads in prison. He likes the crosswords. http://www.vanityfair.com/images/culture/2008/06/cusl01y-mileyslideshow.jpg
Damned with faint praise. Cool. Also, “Vanity fair to Wonkette, in re: articles- tl;dr”
Vanity Fair: like People magazine the celeb shots are better than the articles. still graydon carter looks funnier in a white suit than tom wolfe.
freakishlystrong: knuckle-bump.
This article was written immediately after I joined which provides further evidence that I remain…trendy.
“Stuff White People Like” is more news-related than Jezebel.
“Go Fug Yourself” is apparently the pinnacle of scurrilousness and opinionatedness (which is stupid because those both get so much worse.)
Being called “the wittiest political blog around” is a pretty big compliment, though! Even if it’s from the gaywads at Vanity Fair.
tunamelt: Not the last time I checked. Unless by STI you mean sexual terminology ignorance, which may explain my dilemna.
Vanity Fair publishes Christopher Hitchens, ’nuff said?
Walter Sobchak: Did you miss last month “Buttsex Spectaular” edition of the New Yorker?
tunamelt: STI? Uh..Sexually Transmitted..Intelligence? That’s be a good trick.
Also, “Wonkette to Vanity Fair: VF Articles still funnier than headlines, needs more ass-fucking and/or fisting references. See to it tout de suite, magazine bimbos.”
Wonkette:
“Come for the articles. Stay for the ass fucking.”
THIS IS A POLITICAL BLOG?!?
Also, SHIT ON BY PROFESSIONALS!
“Like Harper’s Bazarre, Vanity Fair is fading out of existence.”
*Bizarre
TGY: I don’t know about you, but I’ve always felt pretty smart after getting laid. There might be something to this.
What The Fuck is Michelle Malkin doing on the earnest side of the graph. Cheerleader porn does not qualify.
Lionel Hutz Esq.: The also flog articles by that courthouse ghoul Dominick Dunne.
And if Rude Pundit isn’t mentioned, then how can can this be a credible round up of trendy blogs?
Mo MoDo: Obsessive retarded people could be characterized as being earnest.
I feel politicky,
Oh, so politicky,
I feel politicky and witty and bright!
And I pity
Any blogger who isn’t scurrilously newsy tonight.
tunamelt: But oh do they ever like me “as a friend.” I’d have so much less time to get funny if I was something other than an underemployed compulsive masturbator.
RaptorAvatar: Wonkette: Home of the Underemployed Compulsive Masturbator. Where else would this kind of snark come from?
Lionel Hutz Esq.: “Annals of Anal.”
ronaldpagan: Nice turn of phrase. You could have a career with Larry Flynt.
Wonkette is great, but we’ll say what everyone knows and thinks: VANITY FAIR SUCKS.
What a crappy magazine.
Well, like, my girl friend told me that “wonk” is “know” backwards? And so I just stood there, like, you know, with my utters in a tonk pot? To tally toadd-faced! What was the question?
What’s a wonk anyway?
Vanity Fair literally said of “Stuff White People Like”: “Only Richard Pryor is this funny.” On that note, I’m going to rejoin the outside world and get terribly drunk. Bye guys!
What?! Where is the REVOLution? Where are our friends at RedState??! This list seems to have some critical flaws.
what is wonkette?
Witty and amusing! And without all the stuffy old drollery that practically forces James Wolcott to revert to regular soul-saving naked orgies of bar-b-que ribs and Jugs Magazine.
Borat: Wonkette is a series of tubes.
How the hell is TMZ considered to be more NEWS than Wonkette?
Ken Layne,
From a magazine that is known more for its pictorials than its articles, I wouldn’t give it a second thought. Now, they are doing kiddie-porn. Didn’t they also do the two covers of Demi Moore pregnant? One she actually wore body paint. Midge is going to do something similar soon…well, after his bus tour. It should be terribly attractive.
Sincerely and respectfully,
Mr-Clark