Carla Bruni-Sarkozy Pens Glorious Ode To Husband: 'You Are My Junk'

Carla Bruni-Sarkozy, the French First "Babe," is prepping her new musical album for release, and some newspaper has already gotten a preview! The collection is titled Comme si de rien n'était , or as Native Americans call it, "maize." It features all sorts of great songs about how she's slept with 30 people, and how husband Nicolas is like heroin. As in, he's wonderful!

Nicolas Sarkozy is a metaphor for "Addictive Illegal Drugs," or vice versa, who cares, this is what Carla sings:

Among the 14 tracks is a song called Ma Came (My Junk) – equating her intense love to a class A drug. Written two years ago, before she met Mr Sarkozy, it is nevertheless dedicated to her husband.

"You are my junk. More deadly than Afghan heroin. More dangerous than Colombian white (powder)," she sings, adding: "My guy, I roll him up and smoke him."

She also sings about her many Lovers: "I am a child. Despite my forty years. Despite my thirty lovers. A child."

The President of France is a pedophile, then? If Barack Obama's black wife said these things, Obama would be thrown in some Compton municipal jail for life.

 Carla Bruni-Sarkozy sings of her 30 lovers and why Nicolas is like Class A drugs [Telegraph]