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HILLARY CLINTON

Hilltards Create World’s Dumbest Website

Jesus fucking christ ....
1996 called, and it wants its crappy GeoCities “home page” back where it belongs, in 1996. Here is the one and only monument to the great movement of angry middle-aged white ladies who managed to graduate high school: 35,000 of them got together and built the world’s lamest website — you must visit it; the letters blink on and off! — with the memorable domain name of “hcsfjm.com,” which stands for “hot cum sandwich for John McCain.”

We can expect a lot more of this kind of stuff between now and whenever these bitter old gals are dumped off by their families at the Budget-Kare Rest Home.

A civilized society does not hand out guns to anybody with $8 of available credit on their Providian card — and yet anyone with the same financial resources can buy a domain name and create a terrible website.

index [hcsfjm.com]


8:23 PM on Mon June 9 2008
By Ken Layne
8733 Views

  1. wheelie says at 8:29 pm, June 9th, 2008

    My god, I’ve seen more tasteful porn sites. A ‘Click here for all-girl action’ link would not look out of context.

  2. Rodney Badger says at 8:31 pm, June 9th, 2008

    The proper use of articles is, quite clearly, elitist.

  3. Lionel Hutz Esq. says at 8:31 pm, June 9th, 2008

    I’m glad you told us it blinked, because I was just about to surf over and see if it did.

    But what truths are they revealing? That Obama is Black? That he is a Muslim bent of the distruction of this nation? That he doesn’t have a marriage of convinence or hasn’t dumped his wife and had an affair because she got fat?

    So many questions that still need to be answered, because it is not like Hillary hasn’t dug up everything she could about Barack.

  4. PoliticalGraffiti says at 8:32 pm, June 9th, 2008

    “Obama Jokes: if you have a joke about Obama, email it to me and I will post it here. barhfarms=gmail.com - change the = for @ and send it to me - Ed”

    wow.

  5. jagorev says at 8:32 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Hey, that blinking text is done in Flash, it’s not the blink tag or an animated gif. This is Geocities 2.0 at least.

  6. hrhkingfriday says at 8:34 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Needs more motion gifs- ie jumping sevens, stoplights

  7. tsunami says at 8:35 pm, June 9th, 2008

    wow…great trolling site for a sensitive 88-year-old stud with
    a lifetime supply of cialis. surely a couple dozen of those coochies
    ain’t lesbos.

  8. ManchuCandidate says at 8:36 pm, June 9th, 2008

    The Paultard is dead, long live the Hilzbot!

  9. WonksRunAmuck says at 8:37 pm, June 9th, 2008

    ok, lets do an acronym here… N.O. E.H.C.S. for John McCain.
    Add an “S” before the “E”
    Now sound it out…
    NO (s)EHCS for John McCain.

    I’m on board for that one!

  10. WonksRunAmuck says at 8:39 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Also - did they steal their slogan from their kid’s vitamins?
    I seem to remember a catchy tune….”hmm hmm hmmm..STRONG and GROWING…”

  11. wheelie says at 8:40 pm, June 9th, 2008

    wheelie: Actually one page has a link that reads ‘Chick here’ but it turns out to be a misprint.

    http://www.hcsfjm.com/story.html

  12. Rodney Badger says at 8:41 pm, June 9th, 2008

    The can’t even coordinate their flashing banner thingy. It’s only a matter of time before some of the letters start burning out.

  13. SloppyCronkite says at 8:45 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Let’s bombard “barhfarms=gmail.com” with support e-mails:

    Oh, this is a great website! We need to UNITE! That dirty Muslim Obama will ruin the country with his black hands. Let’s get John McCain in! He left his disgusting looking wife for a foxy, classy ladee! i want to do that too! I’m afraid of black people! I need the sweet comfort of an old musky man to keep me secure and from terrirst!

  14. wheelie says at 8:47 pm, June 9th, 2008

    In their little poll on the home page, Obama is doing surprisingly well with 38%. Aren’t they smart enough to rig it?

  15. El Bombastico says at 8:47 pm, June 9th, 2008

    “Please bear with me, I have to post each comment manually”

    Beyond awesome.

  16. tsunami says at 8:47 pm, June 9th, 2008

    User Name TCurran
    In Response to
    Comments I have been a Democrat all my life but I feel Obama does not represent the Democratic party. He is a communist, a terrorist appeaser and a Muslim. He’s not even an American. He was born in Indonesia. McCain represents true Democratic values and policies. DON’T BE FOOLED AMERICA, VOTE MCCAIN, THE REAL DEMOCRAT FOR PRESIDENT.

    holy shit. thank god i went to that website or i never would have known the truth about
    barack HUSSANE obama. i just found out.

    thank you wonkette. thank you. garblefitz wenmutt. blackige rammit.

  17. AngryBlakGuy says at 8:49 pm, June 9th, 2008

    …quick someone check that retarded patriots and traitors site!

  18. ronaldpagan says at 8:50 pm, June 9th, 2008

    “This is a anti-Obama website.”

    They might have graduated high school but they sure didn’t do it with honors.

    Honky Cracker Skanks Fighting Jihadist Muslims?

  19. El Bombastico says at 8:51 pm, June 9th, 2008

    wheelie: Look closer. 39% has gone to “Brack” Obama.

    No word on support for Zorack or Thunderclees.

  20. johnbpt says at 8:52 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Damn, McCain’s got the election in the bag now.

  21. norbizness says at 8:52 pm, June 9th, 2008

    I recognize those graphics; I think they were used on a Babylon 5 tripod fan site in 1997.

  22. Godless Liberal * says at 8:53 pm, June 9th, 2008

    tsunami: I can only imagine what sort of things would have been posted if they DID allow lies about Obama.

  23. Chiraq says at 8:54 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Oh WOW. The gals have fired up the generator connected to the Kom-pewter. Ahh. Nothing like an 80-year-old hopped up on arthritis meds talkin’ about Muslimy ‘Mericans. Hillary, how could you have lost this them elections?

    Ima gonna send them an Obama joke because I feel horrible.

  24. jagorev says at 8:54 pm, June 9th, 2008

    El Bombastico: Posting comments manually? Now that’s the hardworking white American way!

  25. NebraskashireGentry says at 8:55 pm, June 9th, 2008

    not quite clear why they consider themselves “Ex-Hillary Clinton Supporters”.

    for people so invested in the woman’s cause, they seem to have forgotten that Hillary Clinton remains a New York Senator, a former First Lady and a major player in the likely Democratic victories in the legislative and executive branches: she is a political figure significant to the entire country.

    their revulsion for Barack Obama would suggest they are far from disassociated with the former Presidential candidate.

    what’s with the “Ex-”, grandmas?

  26. josereyes.theroof says at 8:56 pm, June 9th, 2008

    The Internet: It’s not a big, black buck — it’s a series of fallopian tubes.

  27. memphisheel says at 8:57 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Ooh, I can’t wait to watch the “YouTube video’s” (sic).

    Morons.

  28. wheelie says at 8:59 pm, June 9th, 2008

    El Bombastico: Oh my, the figure is still rising. Let us hope that elitist computer users are not skewing their important poll.

  29. tsunami says at 9:00 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Godless Liberal…tsunami…I can only imagine what sort of things
    would have been posted if they DID allow lies about Obama.

    hahahahahahah…lmfao, but…

    please, GL, keep those images to yourself. i’ve had my fill of
    beastiality websites for one day already.

  30. shouldbeoldenoughtoknowbetter says at 9:00 pm, June 9th, 2008

    ronaldpagan: Word.

  31. jagorev says at 9:01 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Speaking of old people and the intertubes, John McCain has discovered teh Google:

    http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20080609/wr_nm/usa_politics_mccain_google_dc

  32. Godless Liberal * says at 9:06 pm, June 9th, 2008

    jagorev: And has nothing to do with the fact that he authored each and every one of those posts himself. 35,000 strong, my ass.

    Nine million Godless Liberals (*) agree.

  33. ryamidon says at 9:06 pm, June 9th, 2008

    My favorite: “if you have a joke about Obama, email it to me and I will post it here.
    barhfarms=gmail.com - change the = for @ and send it to me - Ed”

    Remember these are blue collar middle class Luddite white hard working American unemployed soldier farmer unemployed Reagan democrat iceberg-lettuce white middle collar blue class American United States citizen Americans. They have only had broadband since 2002.

    Also, if you agreed with Reagan’s positions enough to vote for him you need to give up on the democratic party; if you voted for him because he was affable and folksy, you should stop voting.

    Remember ex-Hillary supporters, America has always been, and always will be, a black man’s world.

  34. El Bombastico says at 9:06 pm, June 9th, 2008

    wheelie: And of course, it goes without saying that the online poll does NOT limit you to one vote per IP address. So I encourage all of us to spend the rest of the evening clicking “Brack” Obama.

  35. Bob Hopeless says at 9:07 pm, June 9th, 2008

    NebraskashireGentry: what’s with the “Ex-”, grandmas?

    Must be force of habit.

    I wonder if the user name Crazy Harriet has been taken yet?

  36. norbizness says at 9:08 pm, June 9th, 2008

    To be fair, this is far more computer literate than I expected a group of West Virginians to be; after all, a malfunctioning TRS-80 burnt down most of Charleston in 1982 and the legislature responded by banning computerized witchcraft.

  37. weirdiowasculpture says at 9:09 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Some sample comments. These people are hilarious:

    I am so glad i found this site. I have been researching the crazy Obama ever since the Wright hate sermons came out. I got on the trinity church web site right away and seen the original BLACK VALUE SYSTEM before they sanitized their site.
    Go to these sites they are the ORIGINAL churches site!!!
    http://www.tucc.org/store/index.cfm?action=catbrowse&catid=69
    GO TO HOME PAGE and scroll down to the bottom and click on the black value system!!!
    THEY WANT TO KILL US!!!
    http://www.tucc.org/scholarship_pdf/black%20value%system.pdf

    http://www.tucc.org/pdf/rey.5-200.pdf
    PLEASE,PLEASE PASS THIS ON
    ==================================================================
    User Name TX-V57
    In Response to Tape
    Comments I noticed on one of your answers about the dvd of Michelle that the person that has it got it from the Nation of Islam. Is this true?
    Yes this is what my friendtell em. Ed
    =================================================================
    User Name rupert nutjob
    In Response to McCain is the one
    Comments To hell with the Democratic party, they have abandoned this country’s Christian roots and nominated a Muslim. What this country needs is not a BAAM (Black African American Muslim) but a good ol’ WASP to deliver us when Christ returns! McCain is the one! Glory Hallelujah!

  38. norbizness says at 9:09 pm, June 9th, 2008
  39. ManchuCandidate says at 9:09 pm, June 9th, 2008

    jagorev:
    I guess the new VP will be either the iPhone or Anna Nicole Smith (assuming you want a human even though she’s dead.) Based on 2007 top US google searches.

  40. onosideboard says at 9:14 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Hey, the original Wonkette is on Larry King Dead!

  41. publius says at 9:14 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Wow. That “What America faces with President Obama” video is just priceless. I love that “no lies” disclaimer at the top. They’re assuming that their target audience doesn’t know the difference between the opposition muck and reality… They also happened to leave out the last say, 40+ years of WALNUTS!’ dreary, awful political life from that video. It’s still fallacious if you leave out information!

  42. They do not allow any Obama lies there. Right.

  43. wheelie says at 9:18 pm, June 9th, 2008

    It’s the worst name for a political website since the erotic-themed “ExploreMcCain.com”.

  44. RaptorAvatar says at 9:19 pm, June 9th, 2008

    they have a poll
    you can vote for “Brack Obama”
    who (in a poll on this hilltarded site) has 42% of the vote.
    I’m convinced that we can turn that into at least 51% by this time tomorrow

  45. Madonna, people, does no one do research anymore?

    http://www.networksolutions.com/whois/results.jsp?domain=hcsfjm.com
    They’re based in Englewood, Colorado, which is in the western part of the Untied States.
    Englewood has a community profile online: http://www.ci.englewood.co.us/Index.aspx?page=544
    Their per capita income is $29,714. That is only 7428 1/2 gallons of gas per year. This means, their SUV’s, at 10 mpg can only go 74,285 miles per year, or 204 miles per day, but since Wal-mart is only 75 miles away and since they work there anyway, they will get by. But they will have to cut down on the Little Debbie cakes.

    Mmmmmm. Little Debbie cakes.

    RESEARCH!

  46. Big Liver says at 9:23 pm, June 9th, 2008

    My God, but isn’t this website a circus of low intellect? How can democracy function after enfranchising such as these? Duh.

  47. DangerousLiberal says at 9:24 pm, June 9th, 2008

    wheelie: I just saw it was up to 44% for the bloodthirsty islamaic. Yeah, this group is really gaining some traction.

    Meanwhile, dig this gem of English exposition:

    “I will be holding a meeting tonight in the chat room at 9 pm eastern. I will email all the member with the link and password at about 8 pm eastern. If you want to attend this meeting, please go and join us. This is for member only.”

    Is it OK if I type my member’s responses? Is this a prelude to Cocktober? A Cocktober surprise, perhaps?

    Or, more likely, these folks are in the <25% IQ stratum of the total asshats.

  48. Also?

    The following source code is telling:
    text_string = “visitors since 5/31/08″;
    txt_color = “#000000″ // Text string color
    counter = 1303317; // Counter starts at this,

    I’m not HTML experty, but doesn’t that mean that they started the stats counter at 1.3 million and change? Crafty!

  49. graceless says at 9:27 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Thank you Wonketter, I never would have believed it. Now I’m afraid. I am very afraid.

    You know it’s bad, when you actually crave that ’70’s porno music…

  50. dilhavarti says at 9:28 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Instructions for voting:
    1. give the squirrels the signed ballot.
    2. they will tie it to the brick.
    3. throw brick at bingo-card return-box.
    4. um… I forget…
    5. massage hand with rose milk.
    6. watch rerun of Golden Girls on VHS.

    Feh! No wonder she lost!

  51. graceless says at 9:30 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Sing it with me: Bo chicka bo booome

  52. Big Liver says at 9:31 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Is it really letting me vote repeatedly? I can’t tell if I’m having an effect… but if I am, I would be happy to sit here voting for a while as I watch the tube, just hoping to induce a stroke in whoever’s behind this.

  53. SwanSwanH says at 9:31 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Great. Now I have screen burn-in.

  54. Odder says at 9:37 pm, June 9th, 2008

    wheelie: Yeah, it got my hopes up that I had finally found the pr0n, but instead it was some lame story cut ‘n pasted from the WSJ.

  55. flyingspaghettimonster says at 9:38 pm, June 9th, 2008

    “Hi folks. My name is Ed Hale and I am life long Democrat till May 31, 2008. When I saw those 30 people break the rules and make their own, and then to vote to take away 4 of Hillary Clinton’s delegates, but worst of all, make the uncommitted go for Obama, that was my last straw. What I saw today was what went on in the USSR (Russia) 30 years ago. The Boss’s called the shots, and I decide that I did not want any part of them.

    “They have treated Hillary Clinton worst than I would treat a mad dog. This site is up to get like minded people to join so if they do go ahead and nominate Obama, we will be ready to make sure that he never goes to the White House. If Hillary get the nomination, then I will be leading the charge for her.

    …poor Ed is borderline illiterate

  56. StrangelyBrown says at 9:43 pm, June 9th, 2008

    I bet the captions in that “Who is the real Obama” video are in perfect focus if you’re a bitter 71-year-old.

  57. Kingbee says at 9:44 pm, June 9th, 2008

    tsunami: Perfect matchmaking site for McGeezer to peruse! Go get’em, boy!

  58. schmenjaminfranklin says at 9:48 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Ladies and gentlemen, but way of some mild investigatory work via YouTube links, I give you:

    The National Organization of Hillary Clinton Supporters Count Too
    http://www.hcsct.com/

  59. Stevious says at 9:52 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Um, 1996 was being kind. The spelling mistakes alone make this a juvenile Republican effort at best.

    “Who will you vote for on November 4th” (Is it a question?)

    John McCain 55.67%
    Brack Obama 44.33% (I know, you meant to spell his name wrong, ha ha that was funny.)

  60. dearest says at 9:52 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Please, it’s too hot for this deep shit. Makes me dizzy.

  61. ex-patate says at 9:54 pm, June 9th, 2008

    “Hi folks. My name is Ed Hale and I am life long Democrat till May 31, 2008. When I saw those 30 people break the rules and make their own,[...] What I saw today was what went on in the USSR (Russia) 30 years ago. The Boss’s called the shots, and I decide that I did not want any part of them.”

    “They have treated Hillary Clinton worst than I would treat a mad dog.”

    The whole site is genius. Thank God for you, Ed Hale.

  62. El Gordo says at 9:56 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Stevious: Jesus. It’s an anti-Obama website and Hillary can only beat him by 10 points.

    Explain to me how she’s the stronger candidate again?

  63. Crow T. Robot says at 9:56 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Earlier today I was bemoaning the fact that I’m no longer funny, and that Wonkette had stopped being elitist & I had to rub shoulders with the riff-raff & commoners while not being funny, thus further reducing even the illusion that I might still be funny, and then I went to the Onion & read their glorious list of the insane & then I came here & laughed & laughed & laughed.

    You all may live until tomorrow.

  64. onosideboard says at 9:57 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Oooh, Bitters Arts N Crafts! (Sorry if the formatting is awful, I’m cut/pasting
    from the hcsfjm comments.)

    “DAILY CALL TO ACTION: ALL HANDS ON DECK!

    18 million hands - send them to the DNC!

    1. Trace your hands on an 8×11 sheet of paper. Make it colorful to grab attention.
    2. Write your name and city/state in the center of your hands and the words
    “I am one of 18 million.”
    3. Above the hands, write: “These hands are on the front lines of democracy.
    I pledge I will not vote for Obama.”
    4. Below the hands, write a line or two about your reasons you won’t vote for BO,
    why you are upset with the DNC, or whatever stirs your soul. We suggest you keep
    it fairly brief for maximum impact.
    5. Put it in an envelope and send it off to the DNC.
    Democratic National Committee
    430 S. Capitol St. SE
    Washington, DC 20003
    6. Pass it on!!! Post this call to arms wherever you can! Let’s bombard the
    DNC with the millions of hands of the voters they dismissed, ignored,
    disenfranchised and belittled. And remember the old saying - “Many hands make
    light work.””

  65. ex-patate says at 9:57 pm, June 9th, 2008

    flyingspaghettimonster:

    Curses! *Shakes fist at your quickness*

  66. wheelie says at 9:58 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Well, here in Wonkette’s shituation room we can now report that in the exciting poll-off between
    the great John McCain and evil hate figure Brack Obama, the terrorist fist-bumper has rapidly gained
    in the last hour from 38% to 45%. An exciting night ahead. Wolf.

  67. El Bombastico says at 10:03 pm, June 9th, 2008

    ex-patate: “The Boss’s called the shots, and I decide that I did not want any part of them.” –Ed Hale

    Who knew Springsteen’s endorsement had such an effect?

  68. Johnny_Zhivago says at 10:03 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Detective time:

    It’s hosted on NTTamerica.com one of the better ISP’s… They are masked with whois privacy (pretty rare for real organizations!) But you can find out more:

    Get a command window on your PC, and do an NSLOOKUP crazyconservativesite.com and when you get an IP address take it to WHOIS (a good one is at DSLreports.com)

    There is a good chance this is co-hosted on some other nutbag site. I check the most obvious ones but there was no match.

  69. El Bombastico says at 10:07 pm, June 9th, 2008

    norbizness: Can someone with better photoshop skills than me do an Obama/Brak mashup?

  70. SayItWithWookies says at 10:09 pm, June 9th, 2008

    jagorev: Best quote from that article:
    “The Arizona senator, who wrapped up his place on the top of the Republican ticket earlier this year, said he still had some time to complete the search for a number two.”
    At his age he’s going to require a lot of Dulcolax.

  71. Redhead says at 10:12 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Now, I just can’t understand how any of them-there people could vote for a Muslim like Obama Hussein Whateverhisnameis. I mean, didn’t you just see that horrible minister of his on tv the other day? He’s such a racist. I think he’s racist against his white half though and thinks his black half is better. He’s not that special. Other black guys have been president before. I mean, he doesn’t agree with the Patriot Act! Why, that’s just the most durned-Republican act I’ve ever heard of. McCain would do SO much better. I mean look at us- we’re all over 80 and we made a PERFECTLY fine website. McCain’s not THAT much older than us. And he was a POW - that was SO much harder than all those people who were imprisoned and beat for civil rights! And could you believe the NERVE of those them-there black people who showed up to Clinton’s rallies? That was just NOT FAIR. I bet they’d vote for a racist candidate like Obama. Why, he’s not even an American citizen! He wasn’t born here! That’s why he’s running for president, you know.

    That HAS to be a joke… right?

    *stolen quotations*
    “He is not really the first black man to become president.” beckey
    “I will not vote for a muslim with a middle name of Hussein.” Grandma-Ohio
    “When the black people at our district convention pushed us around and got inside the air conditioned building before Hillary supporters - some of whom left because it got so hot after 3 hours waiting to get in…I was willing to write that off to just politics too.” onlyhillary
    “We the people in every generation have had to earn our freedom in some way or another, sometimes the task is rather easy ex: Rosa Parks, and sometimes very hard, like John McCain POW.” jp12345
    “I LOVE THIS COUNTRY SO MUCH AND I DONT WONT THE TERRERISTS TO WIN, THEY WILL IF OSAMA IS PRESIDENT.” MAD AS HELL AT BO
    ” It is terrible and tragic loss for great country
    USA that Hussein Obama is put in place of
    nomination not Hillary Clinton great hero. Hussein
    is coward hidden behind message of change (it’s
    false). HILLARY is true champ of change winner of
    gold medal. Hussein is secret (not so secret???
    evil preacher Wright hates America… does Hussein
    Obama?? yes) American hating Moslem. WE DO NOT WANT
    THIS!!!!!!!!” Doug

    The theory of learning by osmosis… does that apply to smacking people upside the head with a dictionary?

  72. HerExcellency says at 10:13 pm, June 9th, 2008

    The more I think about it the more I am convinced that there is no way people this stupid could even locate a polling place. Right? Right!?!?

  73. DoctorCulturae says at 10:14 pm, June 9th, 2008

    SayItWithWookies: A search for #2? That depends.

  74. StrangelyBrown says at 10:17 pm, June 9th, 2008

    schmenjaminfranklin: I love how that website has a video on “Sexism in America” yet both sites are designed by a guy who probably makes his wife iron his shirts.

    This election is teaching a whole new generation of rednecks that “sexism” is when the white candidate loses.

  75. Johnny_Zhivago says at 10:17 pm, June 9th, 2008

    I sent this:

    Is it a coincidence that the “world domination” Bilderberg meeting occurred the SAME WEEK Hillary left the race. Obviously the male dominated leaders of Europe - our new masters - have sent the orders out.

    I also think they have done everything they can to make that menace Bill Clinton do things to harm his wonderful, loving wife.

    Let us all be glad for what Hillary did for us. Like kittens who eternally look to their human masters as their mother, we can always look to Hillary as our mother AND MASTER!

    NEVER VOTE FOR OBAMA!!!

  76. Toonces says at 10:22 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Picture it… a wheezing x486, with a big chunky monitor. The monitor is sitting on a doily, naturally, and surrounded by Hummel figurines, in a corner of the kitchen.

    Edna sits down and checks her AOL mail (been a subscriber since 1998, when she got a free CD in the mail), and sees a message from Rick, a friend from the Eastville Seniors Club (Meets every other Wednesday in the basement of the Baptist church up on Wheeler Lane).

    The email invites Edna to visit http://www.hcsfjm.com/, and she is impressed by the flashing lights and colorful interface. Her arthritic hand clicks through a few postings, and she yells to her husband, watching basketball on the console TV in the living room…

    “JOHN, I TOLD YOU HE WAS MUSLIM. SAYS SO RIGHT HERE!”

    I am such an elitist.

  77. loquaciousmusic says at 10:23 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Johnny_Zhivago: Hah! That was great. And also scary, because there are people who are going to read that and go, “Right on! You know it! Kittens!”

  78. loquaciousmusic says at 10:23 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Also, Flintstones vitamins called. They want their tagline back.

  79. wheelie says at 10:26 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Johnny_Zhivago: Ha ha ha ha ha. I love it!

  80. gjdodger says at 10:29 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Let’s see, carry the “1″…got it. It’s a 105,000-diamond whore.

  81. obfuscator says at 10:31 pm, June 9th, 2008

    At least they have YouTube video’s.

  82. CrunchyKnee says at 10:32 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Dang, the Bitter’s site is busy. I did a whois search on it and got this:

    WHOIS information for: hcsfjm.com:

    [whois.tucows.com]
    IP Address: 128.121.95.55
    Maximum Daily connection limit reached. Lookup refused.

  83. soymocha says at 10:36 pm, June 9th, 2008

    By calling it the worlds’ dumbest website, though, you’re pretty much daring these unmedicated fucktards to create something even dumber. Didn’t this gang jump to the RNC back in the Reagan days? What, exactly, draws them to the Clintons? Do they not get that Hillary likes gayz and baby-killing, up until recently, Negroes?

  84. melving says at 10:36 pm, June 9th, 2008

    I am surprised people this stupid even know what a computer is!

  85. Johnny_Zhivago says at 10:36 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Johnny_Zhivago: oops, I see, homestead is hosted on NTT, and has 195,000 other stupid website under the same reverse IP…

    Maybe this guy is bitter because he needs a better host?

  86. obfuscator says at 10:36 pm, June 9th, 2008

    To be fair, this site probably looks waaaay better with Netscape 3.0.

  87. graceless says at 10:38 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Hey boys and girls, what exactly makes you think that Ed Hale isn’t really Hillary Clinton? Just because she can’t work a coffee machine, is no reason to think that she doesn’t know her way around the Internets… after all, Jim Newell wears panties. Just saying.

  88. Clovis says at 10:44 pm, June 9th, 2008

    This takes me back. A full twenty years ago the mode of commo was a direct call to a site called a Bulletin Board System (EAT). This was done with Dixie cups and threads. The method of presentation of said boards was either ASCII, which meant straight text, or the new, improved model, ANSI, which was an extended character set which allowed flashing colors and even limited animation, such as you find at rest homes.

    Now, were you to imagine anybody bitter enough to skip high school to hang around the boards all day, this is what you might find twenty years after.

    BBS. Broads Being Stupid.

  89. KTHXBAI says at 10:48 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Dear Wonkette,

    Barack Obama is a muslim fist-jabbing terrorist marxist black panther. Also he stomps on puppies and eats babies and tongue kisses (male) terrorists while having gay sex. No I promise it has nothing to do with the fact that he’s black. Totes. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to get back to my job, which involves a barge and/or propane.

    Sincerely,

    Average Pennsylvania Bitter

  90. hazmaq says at 10:49 pm, June 9th, 2008

    I have a little Wonkette tip, but it was too juicy to send in a mere behind the scenes email. On Hardballs today Matthews was proud to show off a new black cowboy hat he brought back from South Dakota. After putting it on on air and commmenting on how good he looked, he was obviously unaware of the significance of the color of the hat.

    As one who has partaken of a wrangler or two, while passing through Dodge, I quickly learned that only the single men out looking for a little action, wore black hats. While the attached or unavailable men wore other colors.
    Chris Matthews, Horndog
    YeeHA!

  91. tropaean says at 10:50 pm, June 9th, 2008

    The Democrat party has left us out in the cold

    Astroturf asshats. Only Republicans call it the “Democrat Party”

    the whois shows they’re hiding behind a “contactprivacy.com”

    buncha peckerwoods

  92. nyhfrog says at 10:50 pm, June 9th, 2008

    I went to the site and it took me 12 seconds to find a lie: It claimed that Sirhan Sirhan, Bobby Kennedy’s asassin, was a muslim extremist. He was orthodox christian.

    Hillary Clinton supporters must no longer support themselves (in any way) since they are liars.

  93. KTHXBAI says at 10:51 pm, June 9th, 2008

    tsunami: I know. I never knew Indonesia was a province of Hawaii.

  94. obfuscator says at 10:52 pm, June 9th, 2008

    I’m kind of depressed by the sheer volume of anger towards Barry, mostly because a substantial % of it is all about racism/racial resentment, in my opinion.

    I’m kind of delighted by the fact that the angriest members of the anti-Barry faction seem to be profoundly fucking stupid.

    Maybe it’s a wash.

  95. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 10:56 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Meow! Can we get some midi on this bitch?

  96. Mahousu says at 11:01 pm, June 9th, 2008

    CrunchyKnee: I tried the whois and got:
    [Querying whois.verisign-grs.com]
    [Redirected to whois.tucows.com]
    [Querying whois.tucows.com]
    [whois.tucows.com]
    Registrant:
    Contactprivacy.com
    96 Mowat Ave
    Toronto, ON M6K 3M1
    CA

    Domain name: HCSFJM.COM

    Administrative Contact:
    contactprivacy.com, hcsfjm.com@contactprivacy.com
    96 Mowat Ave
    Toronto, ON M6K 3M1
    CA
    +1.4165385457
    Technical Contact:
    contactprivacy.com, hcsfjm.com@contactprivacy.com
    96 Mowat Ave
    Toronto, ON M6K 3M1
    CA
    +1.4165385457

    Registration Service Provider:
    Homestead Technologies, Inc, hostmaster@homesteadsupport.com
    800-797-2958
    650-364-7329 (fax)
    http://www.homestead.com

    These bitters are Canadian!

  97. FunkyPalmettoBug says at 11:01 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Mahousu: Christ, McCain is outsourcing his fucking campaign now?

  98. KTHXBAI says at 11:01 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Upon reading the comments on the site it appears that spelling, punctuation, and capitalization of words must be elitist.

  99. FunkyPalmettoBug says at 11:02 pm, June 9th, 2008

    And wow: 35,000. That might make a dent in Wyoming.

  100. I’m of two (elitist) minds on this one. I want to send in a comment in the voice of the bitterest bitter, but if he has my email address, I’m a-scared of the barnyard porn spam I may receive. What to do, What to do…

  101. yes, we can (drink heavily) says at 11:05 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Brack Obama is at 49.74%!

  102. wheelie says at 11:06 pm, June 9th, 2008

    As this screenshot shows, the Hilltard poll is about to go Allah’s way. If you have a gun, please cling to it tonight. Tell it how much it means to you.

    http://i26.tinypic.com/14kjvc2.jpg

  103. Tits_LaRue says at 11:06 pm, June 9th, 2008

    What about the other 17,965,000 Clinton supporters? Huh? What about them?? They are obviously being “forced” to vote for “Brack” against their will by… some nefarious force that I cannot name.

    You know, if there’s only 35,000 of these foolios, I’m going to go ahead and let them know that it’s A-OK to vote for John “Whitey” McCain, Great White Top Leader Of The White Racist Party Of The White Americas For Whites For Hillary, a.k.a. the Republicans. In fact: Please. PLEASE become Republicans! That is now your political party and they welcome you into their white, white party! (P.S. There’ll be balloons. White balloons.)

  104. KTHXBAI says at 11:09 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Oh btw the polling is now 49.98% BHO.

    Way to rally those troops!

  105. Mahousu says at 11:09 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Brack’s broken 50%! However, Hillary is not conceding.

    What? That was last week’s story?

  106. obfuscator says at 11:09 pm, June 9th, 2008

    yes, we can (drink heavily):

    He’s at 50.02%, passing McCain. Astounding. The greatest comeback in American political history.

  107. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 11:09 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Mahousu: Wow, so two embittered Hillary cows are involved.. Who’d a thunk they’d be Canucks? ;)

  108. johnbpt says at 11:12 pm, June 9th, 2008

    YES!!! “Brack” has pulled ahead, and I’d like to think that it was one of 163 votes that put him in the lead. Let no one say that the Chicago Machine has lost its magic touch!

  109. obfuscator says at 11:15 pm, June 9th, 2008

    johnbpt:

    Barack is the new Harold Washington.

    Wait, that analogy makes no sense whatsoever in terms of the Chicago Machine.

  110. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 11:15 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Smoke Filled Roommate: Whoops, being sexist! Fuck me.

  111. Redhead says at 11:15 pm, June 9th, 2008

    The really sad part is that I’m actually, honestly, sitting here contemplating the fact that these angry old ladies might live in Canada and might not realize they can’t vote, period, in this election.

  112. shortsshortsshorts says at 11:16 pm, June 9th, 2008

    You people are SUCH ASSHOLES. Don’t you see that the reason that anti-terrorism initiate website exists (with flashy lights I might add) is because these people have a low level of education and smell like hell? WHY DON’T YOU SUPPORT NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND and SHOWERS FOR ALL (SFA)? Hmmm?????? Is this a conspiracy of teh gays, or of the terrorists, or of teh gay terrorists (the worst kind of terrorist)???? You god damned elitists. I’m going straight down to SF city hall to report you (and get some coke).

  113. Mahousu says at 11:18 pm, June 9th, 2008

    FunkyPalmettoBug: Well, people are always threatening to leave the country if their candidate loses. Maybe “contactprivacy” really did it.

  114. graceless says at 11:18 pm, June 9th, 2008

    sezme: They probably won’t post it anyway. But in future, get yourself a separate email address, just for this purpose.

  115. NotUrEvryDayWEzl says at 11:19 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Despite my extreme difficulty in reading the text of that video, or the usual outrage over the assumption that BHO is a Muslim, what disturbed me most is the image of the Statue of Liberty bearing a James Bond-style pistol harness. WE CANNOT LET WOMEN FIGHT IN THE FRONT LINES! THEY ARE TOO FRAGILE AND MUST BE PROTECTED!

  116. graceless says at 11:19 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Damn Canadians.

  117. shortsshortsshorts says at 11:19 pm, June 9th, 2008

    And I fucking love how the site currently has the population of a suburb outside of Kansas City. Fantastic shit. Way to go pigfuckers!

    Smoke Filled Roommate: Fine, but never again.

    wheelie: 2000 years of guns and Jeebus. Remember your absolutes, children.

  118. shortsshortsshorts says at 11:21 pm, June 9th, 2008

    NotUrEvryDayWEzl: Oh please… your saying you wouldn’t love to see Ferraro on the front lines?

  119. Quacker says at 11:23 pm, June 9th, 2008

    wheelie:

    Well as of 10:20 PM CDT Allah has taken the lead by 30 definitive votes, so now our homeland is about to be carpetbombed (by Muzlimz on Magic Carpets). Oh, the Horror, The Horror…..

    BTW, Did you read any of the Brack Jokes? Almost as funny as Michael Richards, but not quite….

  120. obfuscator says at 11:23 pm, June 9th, 2008

    NotUrEvryDayWEzl:

    I think that video was produced by Leni Riefenstahl.

  121. NotUrEvryDayWEzl says at 11:23 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Oh, and unsurprisingly they still think Sirhan Sirhan was a mooslim.

  122. ronaldpagan says at 11:25 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Wow, Hillary mockery is basically the most popular thing Wonkette has to offer! Not that I blame all y’all; making fun of John McCain is mocking a wizened geriatric. It’s beneath us. We’re like, “You cheated on your wife after she got in a car accident. Classy, dipshit!” He’s like, “Ancient history, Sonny. This penis hasn’t stirred in upwards of 30 years.” All we can say is, “Sorry, sir, enjoy your twilight years.” And that is why we will continue making fun of Hillary and her Army of Bitters, forever.

  123. obfuscator says at 11:26 pm, June 9th, 2008

    NotUrEvryDayWEzl:

    To be fair, he looks like one to them, and he’s got the prerequisite funny foreigner name.

  124. NotUrEvryDayWEzl says at 11:26 pm, June 9th, 2008

    shortsshortsshorts: If it were 1814 and she were on horseback leading troops into battle, sword drawn… hmm… I’m kinda getting Bedknobs and Broomsticks imagery

  125. Tits_LaRue says at 11:28 pm, June 9th, 2008

    “Brack” is still ahead! 50.46%… I wonder if the hcsfjm people know that this poll is not actually casting a vote for President?

  126. shortsshortsshorts says at 11:28 pm, June 9th, 2008

    ronaldpagan: I’d still hit that, with a few bottles of Jack under my belly.

  127. ronaldpagan says at 11:29 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Quacker: Please show me where the Brack jokes are!

    And yay he’s winning by 46!

  128. KTHXBAI says at 11:31 pm, June 9th, 2008

    obfuscator: That’s too weird…I was just about to say “Love to You Tube Video. Soooo Triumph of the Will.”

  129. Johnny_Zhivago says at 11:31 pm, June 9th, 2008
  130. ronaldpagan says at 11:32 pm, June 9th, 2008

    I found the jokes:

    REPORTER (to Barack Obama): At the Academy Awards, Jon Stewart made fun of the fact that your last name, Obama, sounds like Osama, the name of the most hated man on the planet. What is your reaction?

    BARACK OBAMA: Besides the unfortunate name similarity, Osama Bin-Laden and I have nothing in common. One of us is a confident, ethnic man with devoted supporters and a clear vision for the future, and the other is about to be elected President.

    AH HA HA HA HA HA HA THE WELL-SPOKEN DEMOCRATIC CANDIDATE IS WORSE THAN BIN LADEN, I AM DYYYYING…

  131. obfuscator says at 11:36 pm, June 9th, 2008

    ronaldpagan:

    So these people find Bin Laden to be a ‘confident… ethnic man with devoted supporters and a clear vision for the future’? Someone call Homeland Security on these threats from within.

  132. obfuscator says at 11:38 pm, June 9th, 2008

    ronaldpagan:

    They combine the wit of a Larry the Cable Guy with the biting snark of a Don Rickles impersonator.

  133. Johnny_Zhivago says at 11:39 pm, June 9th, 2008

    As if you didn’t guess, this is a dumb “Operation Chaos” project, not an ex-Hilltard project.

    Hillary’s supporters are already back out rescuing feral cats.

    Disclaimer: I rescue also feral cats, but don’t support Hillary.

  134. Tits_LaRue says at 11:42 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Johnny_Zhivago: Read the profile of the chick who posted that “Ed Hale” copypasta…. she likes death metal and LOLcats. Her MySpace page is very, uh, MySpacey.

  135. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 11:43 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Shit, I had a neighbor growing up in Levittown, PA named Ed Hale.. That looks like a website he’d create. I’m convinced it’s him. haha

  136. ronaldpagan says at 11:45 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Johnny_Zhivago: Yeah that’s what I figured, but it seems like Operation Chaos has now become Operation McCain. Any guesses on the number of actual Democrats dumb enough to fall for it? There are some, but prob not nearly as many as the publicity would imply.

    PS: Did you used to be Johnny Zhivago’s Cat? Are you feral?

  137. edgydrifter says at 11:46 pm, June 9th, 2008

    El Bombastico: You leave Mr. Thundercleese out of this! He’s a good neighbor and a good friend to have, and his little buddy Chopper is adorable!

    He would oblivionate Hilz with his mighty laser rocket cannons if she ever set foot on Warren Street. Thundercleese is no fool.

  138. obfuscator says at 11:47 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Tits_LaRue:

    Thanks for the link. Firefox blocked it and a “This page is offensive to my sensibilities” error message popped up.

  139. dilhavarti says at 11:47 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Smoke Filled Roommate: I wonder, did s/he visit Cuba, lately?

  140. edgydrifter says at 11:50 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Tits_LaRue: Moltar is going to carry this one going away, and I for one welcome our new benevolent overlord and his lovely wife Linda.

  141. Rev. Peter Lemonjello says at 11:53 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Johnny_Zhivago: you rule

  142. HughJennicks says at 11:55 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Johnny_Zhivago: “It’s hosted on NTTamerica.com one of the better ISP’s”

    While that may be true, as I have had no prior experience with the hosting service;
    hcfsjm.com is sharing a server with at least 191,467 other sites.
    I do believe the anon-masqued owners of the site went with the cheapest package.

    Also, their choice of anonymizing services is based in Toronto CA.
    The Un-American bastards!

    Or I should say, the Iilliterate Un-American Bastards:

    —/”What “Swing” State should we consecrate on?”/—

    Must have been Home Skooled…

    Contemporary conservatives need to learn how to Peep In The Public Potties without exposing their Freudian slips.

  143. lumpenprole says at 11:55 pm, June 9th, 2008

    If this is Geocities retro, there ought to be a guestbook somewhere for us to deface.

  144. junkscience says at 11:55 pm, June 9th, 2008

    I mentioned to a Hillary supporter that no, in fact, reverse racism does not exist. I thought his head was going to launch into space.

  145. FunkyPalmettoBug says at 11:56 pm, June 9th, 2008

    Mahousu: Maybe they should leave before their inevitably losing candidate loses…

  146. InsidiousTuna says at 11:57 pm, June 9th, 2008

    There’s a general election survey on the site- Obama’s winning. Go wreck that poll’s shit, Wonketteterrorists.

  147. nachoproblem says at 12:05 am, June 10th, 2008

    My God! If this tactic of capturing bitter white menopausal working-class Middle American female voters who have no more than a high school education and usually vote Democrat but distrust people with foreign names and good grooming is successful, John McCain could end up getting the votes of both Patty AND Selma Bouvier.

    I mean, Barry looks just enough like Sideshow Bob for it to work!

  148. Democratica says at 12:06 am, June 10th, 2008

    InsidiousTuna: Yeah, it’s currently holding at 52%+ for Hopey…

    So, just to recap: This is a Canadian website powered by gerbils in tiny bedazzled tracksuits, right?

  149. obfuscator says at 12:07 am, June 10th, 2008

    HughJennicks:

    They’ll be in debt and asking Barry for donations to cover their financial obligations. They’ll also owe Mark Penn $2300.

  150. InsidiousTuna says at 12:07 am, June 10th, 2008

    Democratica: God, I hope so.

  151. Johnny_Zhivago says at 12:09 am, June 10th, 2008

    ronaldpagan: No, no, Johnny Zhivago’s cat is my cat. He’s still posting on Gawker.

  152. Tits_LaRue says at 12:09 am, June 10th, 2008

    obfuscator: I tried to scroll to the bottom of the page, but my eyes lost focus and I had a seizure.

  153. notmccain2008 says at 12:10 am, June 10th, 2008

    Hillary and Obama supporters: We set the HCSFJM record straight at http://www.hcsfjm.org

  154. obfuscator says at 12:10 am, June 10th, 2008

    Democratica:

    That site smells like Febreeze and Misty 100’s.

  155. wonk_the_heck says at 12:11 am, June 10th, 2008
  156. Lincoln' says at 12:11 am, June 10th, 2008

    Kinda reminds me of the Bates Motel.

    “She just goes a little mad sometimes. We all go a little mad sometimes. Haven’t you?”

  157. Johnny_Zhivago says at 12:12 am, June 10th, 2008

    HughJennicks: You’re right, actually Homestead is his host, which has 190000 websites and their host is NTT. More likely, they are using NTT to manage their own server, ie. co-location services.

    In the simpler world of business, you can sometimes find interesting things with reverse IP lookup, but in this case it’s an automatic dead end.

  158. InsidiousTuna says at 12:13 am, June 10th, 2008

    notmccain2008: Hahaha… Love the Abe Lincoln, Mother Teresa, and Teddy Roosevelt on the right side of the page.

  159. font9a says at 12:13 am, June 10th, 2008

    There’s no place like Cony Island when I was a youngster. I still remember how things used to be. It’s not like that anymore. When I was very small I even got lost at Cony Island. But they found me. On the beach. They used to sleep on the beach at Cony Island, but not anymore. You can’t sleep at the beach on Cony Island any more.

  160. stolichnaya says at 12:14 am, June 10th, 2008

    http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=369226310

    Um, holy shit. If the killer from Se7en had a myspace page, that would be it.

    “What’s in the box???”

  161. font9a says at 12:20 am, June 10th, 2008

    well we can’t sleep at the beach any more… not at the cony island beach. they don’t let you sleep there anymore. All right, load em up. These trucks gotta be hauling 45, 55 in the morning. Can’t loose any loads. Check your own loads before hitting the sheets. Report back to me if you need assistance. That hauling can get crazy out there. Just call me on the PA system if you need to call. I have the coffee on all the time. All the time.

    Janice! ?

  162. El Bombastico says at 12:20 am, June 10th, 2008

    wonk_the_heck: Good enough!

  163. heathenish says at 12:20 am, June 10th, 2008

    Can wonkette do to this site what wonkette did to the country over self or what the fuckever that other site was? I always think stuff like this is karl rove’s fault.

  164. Tits_LaRue says at 12:21 am, June 10th, 2008

    notmccain2008: Nice HCSFJM-friendly aesthetic on your Faux-HCSFJM website!

  165. tunamelt says at 12:23 am, June 10th, 2008

    I am sorry but I did not get back from the farm until 9:30 central. I will try and hold the meeting tomorror night. Sorry all Ed

    For serious? Are we sure this is real and not some site someone else made up to mock people with…?

  166. obfuscator says at 12:25 am, June 10th, 2008

    Tits_LaRue:

    Bitter Hillary supporters cause epileptic seizures. That should be obvious.

  167. Democratica says at 12:25 am, June 10th, 2008

    obfuscator: I’d like to take a moment to dedicate the following West Wing dialogue to the gang over at hcsfjm.com:

    “It’s a… crazy place. It’s got this dictatorial leader, who I’m sure wears a muumuu and chain smokes Parliaments.”

  168. heathenish says at 12:30 am, June 10th, 2008

    Was mother teresa a dem. or republican? That link to the mystic hcsfjm, I can’t figure out what that’s about. The more I look at the geocities site (above) the more I think it’s Rove,(or his young republican minions) trying to act like a bitter kicks.

  169. obfuscator says at 12:30 am, June 10th, 2008

    Democratica:

    “Technically, I outrank you… ”

    “SO FAR UP YOUR ASS!”

  170. El Bombastico says at 12:30 am, June 10th, 2008

    heathenish: Well, we’ve got “Brack” up to 54%. I think that’s about all the Operation Chaos we can muster this TI-99/A site.

  171. Democratica says at 12:32 am, June 10th, 2008

    obfuscator: Word.

  172. villageatrois says at 12:32 am, June 10th, 2008

    “They have treated Hillary Clinton worst than I would treat a mad dog.”

    Well, shee-it, Jeb — you been treatin’ yer damn dogs too good. Stop feedin’ their butts. They ain’t never gonna be President of any Alpo-eatin’ cunt tree.

  173. SloppyCronkite says at 12:32 am, June 10th, 2008
  174. Gopherit v2.0 says at 12:41 am, June 10th, 2008

    That site won’t even let us tell them what assholes they are. Fuck that.

  175. HerExcellency says at 12:43 am, June 10th, 2008

    Okay, which one of you all wrote this one?

    User Name Jimmy
    In Response to Must Read (Florida)
    Comments Thank you for this site. I must admit I hadn’t realized before that Obama was the AntiChrist (and I’m sure I heard Pastor Hagee tell that nice Glen Beck that he wasn’t). I wonder what my Christian duty is though. If I campaign against him am I working against the fulfilment of End Times Prophecy? It’s all very confusing, but there seem to be a lot of very smart people on here. What do you think?

  176. heathenish says at 12:45 am, June 10th, 2008

    Johnny_Zhivago: glad your on “our” side or wonkette’s or whatever

  177. Shypixel says at 12:46 am, June 10th, 2008

    RaptorAvatar: 54% and rising… and I can’t help but feel tempted to write up a spider to spam the contact form…..

  178. PioBaroja says at 12:46 am, June 10th, 2008

    stolichnaya: Her profile says that she’s divorced. Is that what its called when your ex husband and two kids are in the basement?

  179. wonk_the_heck says at 12:53 am, June 10th, 2008

    Johnny_Zhivago:

    Thanks for the link. KamiKhaos actually wants us to
    take our voices to the “ballet” box

  180. heathenish says at 12:57 am, June 10th, 2008

    El Bombastico:Wonkette RULES!

  181. PioBaroja says at 1:03 am, June 10th, 2008

    Oh, and this Ed Hale guy, according to various and sundry things I’ve seen, doesn’t have a driver’s license in Texas, if he is in fact 63 and lives in Wellington, which is what folks have been saying. If I lived in Wellington, I’d be crazier than a shit-house rat, too, but he seems to actually live somewhere else, like Midland. Nothing snarky in this, just simple I need to go to bed but won’t just yet, so I might as well publicdata a guy I won’t care about in four hours who lives in a godforsaken part of my state that’s getting a lot of crop money now.

  182. InsidiousTuna says at 1:04 am, June 10th, 2008

    Shypixel: Please do.

  183. FreshCliches says at 1:06 am, June 10th, 2008

    I haven’t voted for Hopey this much since his days in Chicago. Of course, this time, it’s not mandatory.

  184. heathenish says at 1:10 am, June 10th, 2008

    I just got back from the myspace page, I call bullshit! Looking at some of the commenter’s “pages” so looks like the young republicans, kind of gave me the creeps. one guy “mike” has a typically pimp my page or some such, and his music is billy joel, donna summer, and yet he says he’s 21, another one, obiviously crazy mad in love with hillz very obsesive, and not in a good way, creepy. very creepy.

  185. This Hilltard crowd can be easily defeated through a few well-aimed Barry-slash memes. Once you get them thinking about Barry and Johnny Edwards, or Barry and Jim Webb, they’ll become permanently distracted by teh h0t.

  186. AnnieGetYourFun says at 1:17 am, June 10th, 2008

    HerExcellency: OMFG. That is so much fun - wish I had thought of it.

    Did they stop the Brack versus WALNUTS counter? It seems to have stopped counting votes.

  187. melving says at 1:18 am, June 10th, 2008

    That Death Metal/KittyCat chick has a picture ofTupac on her MySpace page. I guess she doesn’t hate all negroes

  188. I object to the paucity of Obama jokes on the site. Here’s my contribution to the genre:

    ————

    In a small West Virginian town, Obama pontificates in front of a sceptical crowd in the town square.

    “Change is coming!” he proclaims. “A better world is on the horizon!”

    A hand rises from the crowd.

    “What’s a ‘horizon’? drawls a man’s voice.

    Obama quickly slips out of ‘orator’ and into ‘educator’ mode.

    “The horizon,” he says, “is an imaginary line where Heaven and Earth come together and which moves away from us as we try to approach it.”

    ————

  189. AnnieGetYourFun says at 1:25 am, June 10th, 2008

    The jokes… um… do they realize that the Conan O’Brien one is really making fun of THEM more than, oh, say, Hopey?

  190. AnnieGetYourFun says at 1:27 am, June 10th, 2008

    I’m happy to report that “terrorist fist jab” now returns many, many Google results.

  191. Cicada says at 1:32 am, June 10th, 2008

    Okay, this has to be from a Wonketteer:

    Can you verify the following which I heard in the last day or two:

    1. Obama is now wearing a Palestine Liberation flag on his lapel?
    2. Obama gave a speech to a group called “AIPAC” last week, which I was told was the Al Queda Political Action Committee. He vowed to let Iran build a nuclear bomb and suggested that the Israelis could move to Florida?
    3. What is this with he and his wife doing some kind of terrorist message - on stage here in America.
    4. Please don’t let Obama go to Iraq I am afraid he will radio the enemy our positions or something.

    Thank you for keeping people like me who try to stay up to day in the know.

    Thelma in Dover.

    Thelma, are you here Thelma?

  192. InsidiousTuna says at 1:34 am, June 10th, 2008

    The moderator posted this at the top of one of the comment pages.

    “I am sorry but I did not get back from the farm until 9:30 central. I will try and hold the meeting tomorror night. Sorry all Ed”

    I don’t know what to say.

  193. NoWireHangers says at 1:37 am, June 10th, 2008

    From the site creator: “They have treated Hillary Clinton worst than I would treat a mad dog.”

    Translation: Hillary’s campaign continued to run wild in the streets, frothing at the mouth, and frightening the children until Obama shot it dead.

  194. InsidiousTuna: Maybe they can all move to Ed’s farm and start a new branch of FLDS.

  195. melving says at 1:39 am, June 10th, 2008

    Brack is up to 55% in their poll. Everybody keep voting.

  196. InsidiousTuna says at 1:39 am, June 10th, 2008

    Cicada: I posted something along the lines of

    “yah we cant elect a muslimm pres cuz if we do obama (osama? HMMMMMMMMMM) will invite his racist terrorist freinds (wright, flager, osama) to sabtage our country. we cant have a black muslim rasist terrorist in tha white house WRITE IN HILLARY!!”

    That’s more or less what I wrote. I really should have copied it. Poor Wonketteering on my part, I apologigze.

  197. NotUrEvryDayWEzl says at 1:42 am, June 10th, 2008

    AnnieGetYourFun: I wonder if I can convince my mother that my, pardon my french, “Wiggerish” brothers are, in fact, terrorists in training?

  198. NoWireHangers: A-tti-cus! A-tti-cus! A-tti-cus!!

  199. InsidiousTuna: This kind of makes me wonder if that whole site isn’t like a teeny-bopper chatroom, where 90% of the teenies are FBI agents and the other 10% are pedophiles.

  200. So, how do they get the 35,000 number, anyway? Have they counted *every* supporter? Or is that just hits to their website? Inquirin’ minds, you know.

  201. InsidiousTuna says at 1:48 am, June 10th, 2008

    AxmxZ: I certainly hope most of these are fake. Some may just be rebel Paultards with a cause, though. =/

  202. naveed says at 1:50 am, June 10th, 2008

    One quick google on barhfarms@gmail.com and viola -

    >The barhfarms@gmail.com address belongs to Ed Hale, a wonderful Texas Delegate to the State Convention and who has done tremendous volunteer work on behalf of Hillary and still does.

    http://clintondems.com/2008/05/from-the-president-of-hillaryclintonsupporterscounttoo-website

  203. NotUrEvryDayWEzl says at 1:54 am, June 10th, 2008

    InsidiousTuna: Give the Paultards credit. Paul may be crazy, but he’s not evil, and they have long memories, and would never actually support either clinton or mccain. now, they might play games to fuck it up, in which case we should embrace our (distant, very removed) brethren in the quest against old people bitters.

  204. Banzai77 says at 1:54 am, June 10th, 2008

    BEST COMMENT EVER:

    User Name Doug
    Comments It is terrible and tragic loss for great country
    USA that Hussein Obama is put in place of
    nomination not Hillary Clinton great hero. Hussein
    is coward hidden behind message of change (it’s
    false). HILLARY is true champ of change winner of
    gold medal. Hussein is secret (not so secret???
    evil preacher Wright hates America… does Hussein
    Obama?? yes) American hating Moslem. WE DO NOT WANT
    THIS!!!!!!!!

    McCain is steady rock of experience. He is hero.
    ‘Mister John McCain will lead us into terrible
    war.’ u probably have said to yourself (traitor!)
    False. He know what war is. Knows terrible tragedy
    of war + will not stop until every last enemy of
    America is ground beneath our mighty boot. Hussein
    will tax and spend until there is nothing left.
    NO!!! McCain is fair man, cuts taxes for hard
    worker the American.

    God bless u Hillary never stop fighting against
    evil oppressor Hussein Obama.

  205. naveed says at 1:54 am, June 10th, 2008

    I don’t know if the information yielded from that search is true, but man, those are 13 craptastically depressing results.

  206. Cicada says at 1:57 am, June 10th, 2008

    InsidiousTuna: I got in the spirit of the whole thing and posted:

    I cant believe the DNC would do this to America. Now they want us to vote for a man who hates white people. I heard on TV that Obama likes anti-white music and food. What is wrong with good American food? Huh? Why does he think hes to good to eat our food? I eat cheese fries every darn day PLUS I SALUTE THE FLAG! He thinks arugula is good. He thinks he is so great. NEWS FLASH: HES NOT!! Sorry DNC but its GAME OVER for NOBAMA!!!

  207. NotUrEvryDayWEzl says at 1:59 am, June 10th, 2008

    why do they link to his voting record? none of them could actually decipher what all those yeas and nays are for. and what is with the pluralization of videos with an apostrophe?

    its fun to see our efforts pushing the site hit counter up. they will think it’s support, and not be able to figure out the difference between unique hits, LOLZ

    BTW…. y’all haven’t been voting us traitors enough at country above self, and don’t give me the excuse that the majority of you have somehow gotten banned…

  208. demtard says at 2:03 am, June 10th, 2008

    Fuck it. I voted for “Brack” and left this comment (note the spelling of Hillary’s name as a doff of the hat to Wonketteers)

    OH MY GOD THANK YOU FOR THIS SITE I HAVE BEEN PRAYING TO JESUS THAT HILIARY WILL BECOME THE NOMENEE SOMEHOW THAT BARACK HUSSANE MUSLEM CANT BE TRUSTED I HAVE BEEN A DEMOCRAT MY HOLE LIFE AND HAVE GIVEN OF MY HARD EARNED MONEY TO THEM TO SEE THE NOMENATION STOLEN FROM HER LIKE THAT IS A TRAVESTY OF JUSTICE AND I CAN NOT TAKE THIS ANY MORE ONLY SHE KNOWS THAT JESUS IS THE WAY HE IS MY ONLY LITE IN THIS DARK WORLD AND A MUSLIM LIKE BARACK HUSSANE CANT UNDERSTAND THAT

    I have always wanted to leave a fucking stupid comment in all caps with no punctuation referencing Jesus as only a Nigerian scam e-mail can. The further irony is that I, too, have the middle name Hussein given by a Muslim parent (or a slight variant thereof).

    My next goal when the fucking road work crew wakes me up at 7am is to figure out a way of subscribing Ed to animal porn. If he is forcefed images of bonobos fucking, that will make up for the rest of this week’s bullshit.

  209. Poor Ed’s site is attracting the crazies. Wonder what kind of farm he’s got? Funny?
    And where do you get those retro-graphics and crazy fonts, do web hosting places supply those
    free?

  210. demtard says at 2:17 am, June 10th, 2008

    Nick: Cows. Or other livestock that he probably overloads with antibiotics.

    http://www.pharmacydirectory.biz/l19011/Naxcel%20Sterile%20Powder/

  211. Fun fact: in Russian, “brak” means either “marriage” or “flawed goods.”

  212. InsidiousTuna says at 2:27 am, June 10th, 2008

    AxmxZ: Carol “Brak” McCain endorses this poll.

  213. populucious says at 2:39 am, June 10th, 2008

    Friends, the support for Brack Obama is up to 56.19%. If we keep going, I guarantee the supreme leader of EXHCSFJMC-tards will be on Fox news by tomorrow afternoon hyperventilating about the “hacking” of their site. I just love the olds and their cute attempts to use the modern technologistics.

    My Barack Obama joke: Hey, did you hear the one about the hard working middle class black guy who beat the privileged white woman in a political race, enraging the state of West Virginia? Yeah, wasn’t that totally hilarious?

    tsunami: Do we dare tell them that John McCain was born in Panama, making him not even a Mexican?

  214. shortsshortsshorts says at 2:57 am, June 10th, 2008

    May the dumbing down and destruction of Wonkette commence. Goddammit- where are the horsemen?

  215. GreatGrey says at 2:59 am, June 10th, 2008

    Regarding the loons that run that hcsfjm site…

    They are pretty thin skinned too.

    Some of us got after their first “poll” they conducted.

    Every time Obama got in the lead, the mgmt of that site would flip the names, but not the numbers.

    It was pretty hilarious all night long.

    Anyway, here’s a link to what their poll looked like before I went to bed, notice the URL, its from them. Lamers can’t even hide their tracks.

    http://www.hcsfjm.com/~site/scripts_webpoll/webpoll.dll?CMD=CMDViewSponsoredResults&ht=index.xpf&s=generic&tp=http://track.homestead.com/~site/Scripts_Track/track.dll&ID=15397497

    They are the worst racists I’ve seen in many a year too, if ya read the comments.

    Oh, almost forgot, good old Ed, the proprietor, hasn’t given a dime to Hillary.

  216. shortsshortsshorts says at 3:03 am, June 10th, 2008

    …and when will McClellen get a job?

  217. GreatGrey says at 3:14 am, June 10th, 2008

    Friends, the support for Brack Obama is up to 56.19%. If we keep going, I guarantee the supreme leader of EXHCSFJMC-tards will be on Fox news by tomorrow afternoon hyperventilating about the “hacking” of their site. I just love the olds and their cute attempts to use the modern technologistics.

    He already has been hacked.

    http://www.hcsfjm.com/~site/scripts_webpoll/webpoll.dll?CMD=CMDViewSponsoredResults&ht=index.xpf&s=generic&tp=http://track.homestead.com/~site/Scripts_Track/track.dll&ID=15397497

  218. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 4:37 am, June 10th, 2008

    There is so much wrong with that video– aside from the text you simply can’t fucking read..
    I especially like how the Statue of Liberty is packin’ some heat at the end..
    “Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning except for 1/4 Kenyan niggers running for president! to breathe oh, and Mexicans, did I mention Mexicans?
    What a racist bitch. Who knew?

    Dude, where’s my fucking country?

  219. byrresheim says at 6:01 am, June 10th, 2008

    57 % pro “Brack” Obama meanwhile …

  220. Baiowulf says at 6:10 am, June 10th, 2008

    Frumps for Grumps!

  221. Johnny_Zhivago says at 6:22 am, June 10th, 2008

    Cicada: That was posted by my cat!

  222. WhiteTrash says at 6:25 am, June 10th, 2008

    Interesting to know who put this piece of shit up…
    A quick check of the whois.net to see who owns the domain and surprise… its protected
    by contactprivacy.com (any inquiries about ownership have to be submitted via contactprivacy.com and it’s up to the HCSFJM owners to respond).

    WHOIS information for: HCSFJM.com:

    [whois.tucows.com]
    Registrant:
    Contactprivacy.com
    96 Mowat Ave
    Toronto, ON M6K 3M1
    CA

  223. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 6:28 am, June 10th, 2008

    Apparently this idiot (or idiots) want ‘Obama Jokes’ (I think they have 5). So I sent one in that I made up myself.. I think I crafted it well to keep those tards reading until the final punchline.. Here goes:

    Jenna Bush having just been married wanted to know everything about being pregnant. Having read many books on the subject she decided to go to a doctor to get sound medical advice. Worried about the pressures of being in a presidential family, she hesitantly asked the doctor,

    “What if my baby was female, do you think she could become president?” To which the doctor replied, “Of course in this day and age, look at Hillary Clinton!”

    Then she asked, “What if my baby was black, could that child become president?” To which the doctor replied, “Of course in this day and age, need you be reminded of Barack Obama?”

    At that point, Jenna felt the doctor was just telling her what she wanted to hear, so she asked a rather obvious question.
    “What if my baby was a white male?”

    The doctor laughed but offered no response and turned as if he were going to leave the room.
    “Please, I need your opinion!” pleaded Jenna.

    To which Dr. Paul replied, “Jenna, many white males have been president. However, your father probably should have been aborted.”

  224. I notice that if you click “contribute” it says “we are not accepting donations at this time”, and right below that button is the “donate” button. Internal consistency FTL!

  225. wallythepug says at 6:32 am, June 10th, 2008

    All this website needs is a game of Pong.

  226. newhampsha says at 6:33 am, June 10th, 2008

    “Obama gave a speech to a group called “AIPAC” last week, which I was told was the Al Queda Political Action Committee.”

    Are we for serious here?

  227. Cicada: That was my thought exactly. Fess up, Thelma.

    If Thelma’s not here, we should recruit her.

  228. Clearly they need to be rickrolled in the comments.

  229. Fferret says at 7:17 am, June 10th, 2008

    Blink tags? EPIC FAIL!!!

  230. InsidiousTuna says at 7:37 am, June 10th, 2008

    Fferret: I think we broke the poor site. =/

  231. SloppyCronkite says at 8:19 am, June 10th, 2008

    Bravo:

    “User Name D Lopez
    In Response to MUST DO THIS ED
    Comments I just read on Hillary Clinton Forum that every time a person clicks on an Obama ad it cost the Obama camp money. The ads that have Obama cost him $1.29 every time they are clicked….we should keep this quiet so they don’t do the same thing to McCain but this would be a good plan for the online chat meeting…we could bankrupt him….”

  232. Darehead says at 8:24 am, June 10th, 2008

    Smoke Filled Roommate: Hahaha! More, please.

  233. Walter Sobchak says at 8:30 am, June 10th, 2008

    Wow. Coming from someone who’s designed some horrible websites, that is a HORRIBLE website. The source is just a mess. I should volunteer to “help fix it, you know, for the cause.”

  234. toastandlove says at 8:37 am, June 10th, 2008

    YES

    They posted my comment!

    Truck Nutz 4 WALNUTS!! 4EVER!!!!!

  235. freakishlystrong says at 8:39 am, June 10th, 2008

    WOW, i think that site gave me herpes..what those hags need is a good ole fashioned terrorist fist fucking!

  236. toastandlove says at 8:40 am, June 10th, 2008

    User Name Truck Nutz 4 WALNUTS FROM TX

    In Response to WALNUTZ!

    Comments HILLARY WUZ CHEATED Y DINT THEY COUNT TEH VOTEZ FROM MI AND FL THAT IS NOT OK 2 DISSENFRANCHIZE VOTERZ LIKE THAT OBAMA IS A MUSLIM DUSNT THAT SCARE NEONE A MUSLM AND PROBLY HAZ TIES 2 TERRORUISTS IN TEH MIDDLE EAST. HIS MIDDLE NAME IS HUSSEIN LIKE SADDAM PPL! HILLARY 4EVER I HOPE SHE RUNS AS AN IND BUT IF NOT I AM VOTING 4 MCCAN.

  237. El Bombastico says at 8:47 am, June 10th, 2008

    Well, the poll is gone. We bastard are indeed running scared:

    “It looks like someone has hacked into this poll and for every vote John McCain gets on your poll, Obama is getting several more. I don’t believe the numbers are right.

    Your right I have an IP blocker so I tested the poll looks like for every one vote for John McCain B. Hussein Obama will get three on the next vote that is cast for McCain. This Poll my be setup by B. Hussein Obam

    Yep, your right, they also hacked into the hit counter and reset it to less than a 100,000. These bastard are running scared when they have to hack a web site.”

  238. Securicom says at 8:48 am, June 10th, 2008

    Biderberg Group info at infowars.com

    USA’s Constitution and currency are being destroyed from within. How? Videos free on http://www.video.google.com 1) America: Freedom to Fascism, 2 hrs; 2)911 Justice, 18min; 3) The Clinton Chronicles, 1.7 hrs; 4) Endgame: Blueprint for Global Enslavement, 2 hrs, 5) Terrorstorm: A History of False Flag Terror, 2 hrs 6) 911 Mysteries, 2 hrs; 7)The Creature from Jekyll Island, 1hr; 8)Orwell Rolls in His Grave, 2hrs; 9) The War on Democracy, 1.5 hrs; 10) The Energy Non-Crisis, 1 hr; 11)Iraq for Sale 1.2 hr; 12) Zeitgeist, 2 hrs; 13)Ring of Power, 2.5 hrs; 14)Bush link to JFK, 1.5 hrs; 15) The Century of the Self, 4 hrs; 16) Loose Change (2nd ed & Final cut) 2hrs each; 17)John Pilger: The New Rulers of the World; 18) The Money Masters: How International Bankers Gained Control of America, 3.5 hrs
    Videos free on http://www.video.google.com 19) Barack Obama CFR info 20) Global Warming or Global Governance 21) The Great Global Warming Swindle 22) Mercury, Autism and The Global Vaccine Agenda 23) The CIA, Mind Control and Satanism 24)George Hunt: UN UNCED Earth Summit 1992 (Population Reduction) 25) End of NAtions - EU Takeover 26) Washington, You’re Fired 27) Blackwater: America’s Private Army 28) Esoteric Agenda 29) Fiat Empire: Why the Federal Reserve Violates the U.S. COnstitution 30) The Revolution Will not be Televised [USA overthrow of Hugo Chavez] 31) One Nation Under Siege 32)Breaking The Silence - Truth and Lies in the War on Terror, by John Pilger(and all his documentaries) 33)Beyond Treason 1.5hrs

    http://www.911truth.org/article.php?story=20041221155307646

  239. RuperttheBear says at 8:49 am, June 10th, 2008

    weirdiowasculpture: The line between parody, satire, and drinking too much and then posting is vety thin. Just ask Truck Nutz 4 WALNUTS.

  240. Mahousu says at 8:51 am, June 10th, 2008

    toastandlove: Yeah, but look at the burn that Ed gave you:

    If you can’t do a better job with the spelling and grammer (sic), leave the caps off, this will be the last post you will get here at this site. ANYONE USING CAPS from now on will not be posted - Ed

    GRAMMER NAZI’S FOR HILARY!

  241. Walter Sobchak says at 8:52 am, June 10th, 2008

    El Bombastico: Oh, and here you go: [IMG]http://i26.tinypic.com/bg2ogk.png[/IMG]
    Christ only knows if embeds are working now, so here’s the direct link:
    http://i26.tinypic.com/bg2ogk.png
    I smell a new avatar for someone…

  242. Darehead says at 8:52 am, June 10th, 2008

    Securicom: DryFact/Zeeb?

  243. Redhead says at 8:57 am, June 10th, 2008

    Wait, where’d the poll go? Awww, boooo on Ed, that’s just no fun.

  244. loquaciousmusic says at 8:59 am, June 10th, 2008

    Banzai77: Everyone join hands and sing!

    I wanna know what war is…
    I want you to show me!

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=z9OGfBGOCpk

  245. loquaciousmusic says at 9:00 am, June 10th, 2008

    Redhead: I know. I was all excited to get up today and vote. Sad.

    Who’s the Communist now, Eddie?

  246. demtard says at 9:00 am, June 10th, 2008

    toastandlove: Beautiful post. I bow to a skill far superior to mine!

  247. toastandlove says at 9:09 am, June 10th, 2008

    “It looks like someone has hacked into this poll and for every vote John McCain gets on your poll, Obama is getting several more. I don’t believe the numbers are right.”

    First Country Above Self, now the Hiltards…Guys I think by these standards Wonkette is the 133t-est bunch of h@x0rz there ever was.

    (the Olds think “hacking” is some kind of dark magic)

    (I hacked into Wonkette’s nodes to post this)

  248. TJBeck says at 9:14 am, June 10th, 2008

    Final poll results are here - http://nupolls.com/result/43087/

    John McCain: 41.35% 1392
    Brack Obama: 58.65% 1974
    Total 100% 3366

  249. Darehead says at 9:17 am, June 10th, 2008

    TJBeck: So where are the 35,000 Hilltards?

  250. Walter Sobchak says at 9:18 am, June 10th, 2008

    Oh, come on, wonkette, I worked on a Brak/Hopey mash-up for almost 5 minutes! No love at all?

  251. TJBeck says at 9:21 am, June 10th, 2008

    BTW, I did actually attempt to hack the poll. It’s all javascript, but the results weren’t refreshing off my hack page, so I didn’t think it worked. I only made it loop 5 times per click, and tried it about 6 times. If it worked I was going to make it more like, say 537 votes per click, but never got there.

    Basically, clicking here - http://nupolls.com/ajaxvote/43087/2 - should register an Obama vote.

  252. TJBeck says at 9:23 am, June 10th, 2008

    Darehead: Didn’t you read what happened - “It looks like someone has hacked into this poll and for every vote John McCain gets on your poll, Obama is getting several more. I don’t believe the numbers are right.”

    Obviously the only reason Brack was ahead was because the 35,000 hilltard votes were CHANGED by HACKERS. Nothing else could possibly have made Brack win.

  253. Redhead says at 9:27 am, June 10th, 2008

    This is interesting.
    Ed’s original site (with a new poll to play with!): http://www.hcsct.com/
    blog discussing Ed’s original (fake?) site: http://mccaindemocrats.blogspot.com/2008/05/about-fake-site.html
    Clinton Democrats discussing Ed’s original site: http://clintondems.com/2008/05/two-groups-using-the-name-clinton-supporters-count-too/

  254. Redhead says at 9:29 am, June 10th, 2008

    TJBeck: yeah, I saw that… after I already posted, lol.

    That’s an awfully low number of votes for 35,000 and growing… especially factoring in that at least half of them were people from this site.

  255. Darehead says at 9:30 am, June 10th, 2008

    TJBeck: Ah so. I didn’t read ja right. The Brack Hacker Attack!
    And OLDS think “hack” is what precedes “pttttooooooeeeeeeeeey.”

  256. IntangibleArts says at 9:35 am, June 10th, 2008

    Great potato christ! I’ve seen better websites on cave walls.

    And I’ll wager those “35,000 people” are merely the Zoloft-induced multiple personalities of one batshit crazy old crone in Charlotte, NC, who gets investment advice from the ghosts of her many deceased cats and is knitting a skin-suit from all the paper-boys she’s kidnapped over the years…

  257. ManchuCandidate says at 9:39 am, June 10th, 2008

    TJBeck:
    LOL

    Seriously, if I’m Walnuts I’m crapping my Depends. Even on a stupid web poll supposedly for the Hilz menopausal bitters that he’s out maneuvered by the ‘tubes again. “I would have won if it weren’t for you meddling kids!” said Walnuts as he shakes his fist against the sun and clouds in the sky.

    I voted Hopey and I voted once. No hacking there Operation Chaos dipshits.

  258. toastandlove says at 9:57 am, June 10th, 2008

    Here we go, since Our Mr. Ed burned me so bad and hurt my feelings on my last comment:

    User Name Clinton Lover in VA

    Comments It is my belief that B. HUSSEIN Obama would be the worst thing ever to happen to the US! 4 years of B. HUSSEIN would RUIN this country. We are a country founded by WHITE settlers with CHRISTIAN principles, B. HUSSEIN just wants to corrupt our young people into believing his lies that NON-WHITE, NON-CHRISTIANS are just as good as the rest of us, we all know better, I raised MY children right, they know they are going to go to HEAVEN when God takes them and the HEATHENS (unbelievers, pagans, homos, and Negroes) will be PUNISHED in hell like they DESERVE

    CLINTON understands us, white hardworking Americans!

  259. steverino247 says at 9:58 am, June 10th, 2008

    Electing Brak Obama would be 9/11 times 18 million.

  260. apocalypsethen says at 9:58 am, June 10th, 2008

    Smoke Filled Roommate: shockingly–or maybe not–they posted your “joke.” I think I’m going to post a passage from “the metamorphasis” but change some names and words around and pretend it’s supposed to be funny.

    the longer the better.

  261. Redhead says at 10:17 am, June 10th, 2008

    hmmm, I thought I posted this but it’s not up here. Oh well.
    Ed’s original site is here: http://www.hcsct.com/
    He apparently changed it after another group, the Clinton Supports Count Too group, objected to the two names being so similar.

    And another hit… Ed’s email address showed up on signupforspam.com. Nice. Was that someone here?

  262. Smoke Filled Roommate says at 10:17 am, June 10th, 2008

    apocalypsethen: Wow, I am shocked. The whole point of it was that it wasn’t really about Barry at all.. ha! morans

  263. Darehead says at 10:37 am, June 10th, 2008

    The rains have gone, the sun is shining, flowers are growing, and out come the Paultard Truthers! Anyone notice them posting on old threads and above on this one, which is also duplicated elsewhere!? Yay, we’re infiltrated. Shorts, where are you?

  264. JennaBush says at 10:38 am, June 10th, 2008

    Bahr Farms, Inc.
    Dale Bahr
    23376 County Rd. F
    Belmont, WI 53510
    608-762-5974

  265. Deepthroat says at 10:57 am, June 10th, 2008

    is this illiterate, ex KGB, dog fight promoter just doing this for a little 54 year old pussy, or is he actually insane?

  266. Whore Diamond in the Rough says at 11:10 am, June 10th, 2008

    This post was just got a shout-out on the Stephanie Miller show 3 minutes ago.

  267. Sean O says at 11:22 am, June 10th, 2008

    Redhead: ::cough:: no comment.

  268. HollowBrain says at 11:55 am, June 10th, 2008

    Check it out Wonketeers, they haz a store now!

    http://www.hcsfjm.com/store.html

  269. Redhead says at 12:04 pm, June 10th, 2008

    HollowBrain: Did you see the last t-shirt/bumpersticker “idea”?

    “WARNING! I’M A BITTER GUN-OWNER CLINGING TO MY RELIGION.”

    Have they not realized that that one is making fun of THEM? Then again, they approved the jokes making fun of Bush and McCain, so I’m not sure why this surprises me…

  270. Darehead says at 12:04 pm, June 10th, 2008

    HollowBrain: Thanks 4-da link. I wanted to order some stuff but I don’t have any spare change.

  271. loquaciousmusic says at 12:04 pm, June 10th, 2008

    HollowBrain: It’s taking too long to load and ALL I WANT IS MY “DEFEATOCRATS” T-SHIRT!

  272. graceless says at 12:05 pm, June 10th, 2008

    melving: I can’t find the place to vote.

  273. loquaciousmusic says at 12:07 pm, June 10th, 2008

    HollowBrain: Oh, j/k LOL, it loaded. This is my favorite:

    http://www.hcsfjm.com/Store1/R75.jpg

    Seriously. Go to CafePress and type “bitter” into the search box. There are 1,700 results. There’s also a Hillary t-shirt that reads, “Not bitter. Better.”

    All I can think of is this:

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=xBcdRDB14e0

  274. HollowBrain says at 12:07 pm, June 10th, 2008

    Minor correction. Apparently it’s not so much a store as it is a “a few ideas that we can mkae into t-shirt and bumper stickers.”

  275. HollowBrain says at 12:15 pm, June 10th, 2008

    I’m am truly boggled by this “store”

    All these folks are claiming to be ex-Hiltards, however all those jpeg images that they proudly display are astonishingly anti-democrat. I can honestly say that I profoundly appreciate the juxtaposition of the “Friends Don’t Let Friends Vote Democrat” .bmp right on top of the “Democrats For McCain” .jpeg.

    They do know Hilz is a Democrat right?

    That all said, I think they should change the macro on the one picture With Hilary and a pair of copy & pasted boxing gloves from “Comeback Kid”, to “Million Dollar Baby”.

  276. Redhead says at 12:35 pm, June 10th, 2008

    HollowBrain: I thought that too, as well as all the references to the “liberal media” and their support for Fox News - typically stances taken by conservatives and Republicans.

    I have a very hard time thinking anyone made this site to be serious. Maybe it was made by McCain supporters to detract from Obama. I’ve said all along that the Republican party is threatened by Obama - you only have to look at the ridiculous amounts of money the spent on smear campaigns before Obama had even gained the nomination. Does anyone REALLY believe that the Republicans want the best candidate running against McCain? Of course not. They want the candidate they can most easily defeat. So why are they putting so much effort into promoting Clinton and defeating Obama?
    And who thinks this Ed person sounds more like a Republican trying to be sneaky than a disgruntled Democrat?

  277. HollowBrain says at 12:46 pm, June 10th, 2008

    Redhead:

    All I know is, I’m going to get fired if I keep reading the comments page:

    “Please read this. Hawaii would need to have been a state 5 years before he was born if one parent was not an American citizen. It was only a state 2 years before he was born!
    OMG - this is true. I think we need to hire a lawyer and challenge Obama. According to the law, he is not able to run for the president of the USA. Folks, we need Attorney now. I will call a meeting tonight and get this going. Our gal still maybe “Madame Presdient” - Ed”

    There is no netslang to describe the guffaw I had whilst reading that.

  278. Deepthroat says at 12:54 pm, June 10th, 2008

    Where do i vote on that site?

  279. Redhead says at 12:57 pm, June 10th, 2008

    HollowBrain: I was just about to post that!
    If you click to go to the “article” he’s referring to (another blog post, that one copied from yet another blog post by someone who did not even bother to use a real name and containing grammar and spelling on a level equal to what is found on Ed’s charming little website), it talks about Obama’s father not being a US citizen. It says that, since only one parent was a US citizen, that parent (his mother) must have resided in the US for 10 years prior to his birth, and that 5 of those years must have been over the age of 16. It then says that since his mother was 18 when she had him, she had only resided in the US for 2 of the 5 years over age 16 required. (It does acknowledge that she resided in the US for more than 10 years before giving birth.) It barely mentions the status of Hawaii as a state vs. a territory.

    I love how they refer to random gossip as an “article” and then can’t even discuss that coherently! They can’t even get their own issue straight.

    How many cows do you think farmer Ed would have to sell to hire that attorney- and can you imagine the guffaws when he walks into a law firm and asks someone to represent him on THIS case?

  280. HollowBrain says at 12:58 pm, June 10th, 2008

    Voting is down.

  281. Redhead says at 1:08 pm, June 10th, 2008

    Let me also add this: “Note that people born in the following places are defined in Sections 302-307 of the INA [8 USC §§ 1402-1407] to be US citizens: Puerto Rico; the Canal Zone; Alaska and Hawaii (before they became states); the US Virgin Islands; and Guam.”
    “Prior to 14 November 1986, the physical presence requirement in this case was ten years (instead of five) — including five years (instead of two) spent after the parent’s 14th birthday. The requirement was reduced in 1986, but the change did not retroactively make US citizenship available to people born previously who did not meet the old requirement. (Congress’s intent not to make this change retroactive was affirmed in 1988 with the passage of Public Law 100-525, § 8(d), 102 Stat. 2619).”
    The age is actually 14, not 16- but note that that only applies to children born to US citizens while OUT of the country, and that being born in territories (such as Hawaii at the time, or Puerto Rico today) is still considered in the country, meaning the fact that they STILL could not get the little details right in their silly argument is a completely moot point, seeing that Obama was born in the US and thus has citizenship from the time of birth.

  282. edgydrifter says at 1:09 pm, June 10th, 2008

    Over at WIRED, the tenor of the bitters is… well, bitter. Here’s one of the more lucid responses to a post they ran on their Threat Level blog about Ed’s website:

    “I’m not being spiteful by voting for McCain at all. Just look at it the way I do. It’s all about TRUST. Between the two choices we have “right now,” who do you trust more. That’s a no brainer, Senator McCain of course. It’s not a race thing for me at all. I just don’t trust Obama. At all. This dem is supporting McCain all the way.” –Cindie

    Mmm-hm. Enjoy your uterus chip, sweetie.

  283. HollowBrain says at 1:13 pm, June 10th, 2008

    JennaBush:

    Bahr Farms, Inc.
    Dale Bahr
    23376 County Rd. F
    Belmont, WI 53510
    608-762-5974

    I wonder if Ed likes pizza.

  284. edgydrifter says at 1:15 pm, June 10th, 2008

    Redhead: Which is good, because otherwise nobody born of a mother under the age of 20 could ever be president, and I suspect that would nullify the presidencies of about half the dudes who ever held the office. Hence it would make Madame Hilz Retroactive President of All History Forever.

  285. Redhead says at 1:24 pm, June 10th, 2008

    edgydrifter: But that only applies to children born outside the US anyway. A child born to a 9-year-old mother could be president as long as s/he was born in the US, including Hawaii.

    My point was more that they can’t even get the details of their silly, and wrong, arguments correct.

  286. loquaciousmusic says at 1:24 pm, June 10th, 2008

    edgydrifter: Dude, obviously “Cindie” is voting for McCain, since “Cindie” is “Cindie McCain.” She dots the “i” with a little heart, too.

  287. populucious says at 1:32 pm, June 10th, 2008

    Darehead: I too wanna order stuff, but I caint figger what slot in the computerized station to put my quarters.

  288. edgydrifter says at 1:34 pm, June 10th, 2008

    Redhead: You were expecting clear, rational thought presented in a well-reasoned manner perhaps?

    loquaciousmusic: No way–everyone knows Mrs. Trollop isn’t allowed to use the intertubes. These new-fangled automated Turing machine devil-boxes scare her husband, and “Bad John” doesn’t react well to frights.

  289. Redhead says at 1:39 pm, June 10th, 2008

    edgydrifter: Well, I was at least expecting the level of research that five minutes and a google search can produce before actually discussing hiring an attorney to pursue such a ridiculous claim.

    Though can you imagine the look on the attorney’s face when good ol’ Ed tried to hire him to sue Obama for being born in Hawaii (NOT the US!) and offered to pay him in cows and anti-democrat bumper stickers? Now THAT would be a priceless You Tube video’s.

  290. Redhead says at 1:53 pm, June 10th, 2008

    Did anyone else see this?
    After a poster inquired whether it were safe to donate money without having her information hacked by Obamites, good ol’ Ed replied, “The most secure way in the world to send money is threw paypal.”

    Now I know it HAS to be a joke.

    This after he said, “Obama people have tried and fail to hack this web site.”

    But wait, didn’t the Obamites already hack his poll?

  291. HollowBrain says at 2:06 pm, June 10th, 2008

    Redhead:

    Nah I’m pretty sure this is the real deal. People are this stupid.

    Anywho

    A CHALLENGER APPEARS!!

    http://hcsfjm.org/

    Tee-hee.

    Ed’s take: “Desperate people do desperate thing.”

  292. HollowBrain says at 2:11 pm, June 10th, 2008

    Yo know what Redhead, I take back my last comment.

    This is a really good internet troll.

  293. notmccain2008 says at 3:39 pm, June 10th, 2008

    Come on: http://www.hcsfjm.org is not associated in any way with http://www.hcsfjm.com.

    The message is that though Hillary supporters may not be crazy about Obama, they should not shoot the country in the foot by voting for McCain (or any Republican presidential candidate).

  294. HollowBrain says at 4:26 pm, June 10th, 2008

    Oh well thanks for clearing that up. It makes a world of sense now.

  295. apesauce says at 5:09 pm, June 10th, 2008

    This is so sad:

    “They have treated Hillary Clinton worst than I would treat a mad dog.”

    Or worst than how you treat the English Language, Ed Hale.

  296. Lazy Media says at 5:44 pm, June 10th, 2008

    Well, at least they use the apostrophe correctly, to signal that an ’s’ is coming at the end of the word.

  297. starstream says at 4:05 pm, June 12th, 2008

    Hrm I agree with Redhead, ( I have also noticed most Redheads are not from
    ’shytown (chicago) not camera shy at all (which is Good for the camera)..
    Makes conversational debate tolerable..

  298. GreatGrey says at 4:56 am, June 15th, 2008

    The unpeeling of Ed Hale has just begun.

    Is Ed a Fraud?

  299. JavaJack says at 8:58 am, May 27th, 2009

    It went away, you scared it. Bad Wonkette.

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