Wonkette
A pack of grieving Clinton supporters in Minnesota dragged their dejected pantsuits over to the Xcel Center the other night and were amazed by the fact that Barack Obama and his army of houligans weren’t complete dicks to them. The Democratic nominee met with a bunch of Clinton heavies and shook their hands and then Michelle Obama “put her hand out to mine and rubbed her cheek against mine.” That is just the beginning of the amazing night these Clintards had discovering that NOBAMA and his ilk meet the minimum threshold for basic human decency.
Here’s what happened to Jackie Stevenson, a state Democratic activist:
She had arrived at the building with Humphrey, and as they were taken to their seats, people kept stopping to hug them and thank them for being there.
Laughing, she spoke of how she decided she needed to make a trip to the restroom before Obama’s speech. Again, people kept stopping her to shake her hand.
They almost let her use the restroom and everything.
Clinton supporters wowed with warm reception at Obama rally [MinnPost]
“It’s, like, if you’re nice to them, they bring you things?”
At the next Obama rally, I’m going to disguise myself as a prodigal Clintard so that Michelle Obama will put her hand out to mine and rub her cheek against mine.
That’s because EVERYONE in Minnesota’s nice.
Bring ‘em to wonkette. We’ll learn ‘em.
Nice and classy. No wonder Clintonians didn’t recognize such odd behavior.
Obviously they haven’t been on the D.C. Gossip website, Wonkette, where Clintards are tarred, feathered and run out of town on a rail.
What they didn’t realize at the time, was that all of those people had coughed and sneezed on their hands before shaking hands with her, without using hand-sanitizer. It was actually smale scale bio-terrorism.
Well, hell. Though part of me whispers it’s easy to be gracious to someone you’ve beaten, still…I suppose being bad at bowling isn’t the only thing that proves Barry is the anti-Nixon.
And to thank them for their kindness, Clinton supporters have been calling Clyburn and saying racist shit.
http://blogs.tnr.com/tnr/blogs/the_stump/archive/2008/06/05/oy.aspx
Black folks have been getting pretty uppity since Obama got the nomination. I mean, how disrespectful can you get, celebrating the win by your chosen candidate? They should be asking what Hillary wants, and how Hillary feels. Obama should be giving her foot massages and asking her if she wants to take his place as Prez. As hillaryis44.org asked, when will Obama concede?
What, they didn’t slap some dap? WTF?
I’m guessing Larry Johnson wasn’t there.
Or maybe he was, just so everyone could laugh at him.
Well really Jackie didn’t use the restroom because she was looking for the one that said ‘whites only’, which were all over the place at Hillary’s venues.
tunamelt: So did anyone get the stink palm then? “would you like a pretzel?”
Michelle rubbed her cheek against mine, and instantaneously my acne cleared up, I lost 10 pounds, and my skin had a vibrant, radiant glow.
“… she spoke of how she decided she needed to make a trip to the restroom before
Obama’s speech …”
Jackie had to unpack her sniper rifle in private, but the Obamatards kept her distracted.
Good work, Obamatards; you distracted her without letting her know of your plans to foil
her plot.
Obama’s team just wants to know where all the Clinton
supporters are at all times.
They have lookouts at every WalMart hunting section in the state.
Don’t they understand you’re supposed to pretend to be nice at a funeral? I mean, if Dick Cheney dropped dead (it’ll never happen, so this is purely hypothetical) I’d still be nice to Lynne and everyone else.
…there was no there saying “M.F’er I more ice tea!!!”
…and there was no one there saying “M.F’er I want more ice tea!!!”
I bet they were forced to use the WOMEN’S ONLY RESTROOM. Is there no end to Barack Hussein Obama’s treatment of women as second-class citizens?
NotUrEvryDayWEzl: It’s easy to be nice when you’re drunk on good booze and schadenfreude.
I bet McCain wishes he was hung like that squirrel. McCain has better cheek sacs though.
NotUrEvryDayWEzl: Keep your friends close, and your enemies closed up in a large, discount warehouse, preferably with no windows and a slowly decreasing supply of fresh oxygen, food and water?
jagorev: All c’mon you ripped off whites only joke!
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if the Hillary folk would get off their asses and join the party, poopers?
weirdiowasculpture: McCain’s an old man. Given the WASPy trend for one’s manpurse to lose elasticity over time, I bet that has a better than a passing resemblance to a naked McCain.
Gopherit v2.0: There’s nice, and then there’s “Minnesota nice.” Minnesota nice is a well-known characteristic of the Norwegian-influenced Minnesota culture where they act as civil and pleasant as they possibly can because it’s required - even if they secretly wish that you would die horribly from exploding kidney stones.
Was Barry supposed to rape them as Michelle stood by screaming “Step OFF bitches!” ?
tunamelt: Are you suggesting that Hillary gave her speech the other night in front of Obama supporters?
10 bucks to anyone that gets Wally to rub his cheek on them.
Later that evening, the Hillary supporters went to a restaurant in a black neighborhood, and were surprised to see the other patrons enjoy their meals without shooting anyone or shouting “Mother fucker! Shit beeaatch!”
The thing is, I’d like to say something really witty and biting, but the truth is this story just makes me sad. It just confirms the complete disconnect I’ve heard from so many of the Clinton supporters. Obama is not an ass! His supporters aren’t a nefarious organization of brainwashed space aliens! This campaign was never about hurting Hillary Clinton’s feelings or ruining 18 million invisible American’s day!
Sorry…I was just overcome for a minute. A few deep breathing exercizes and I’ll be back in snarky fighting form!
freakishlystrong: Only in their deepest, dirtiest dreams.
What’s hilarious is that the comments on Ben Smith about this are Clintardastic!
http://www.politico.com/blogs/bensmith/0608/Wooing_the_Clintonites.html#comments
-So what? If Clinton supporters liked his speeches and enjoyed shaking hands with him, we’d already be supporting him. Stylistically, he was a better candidate than Clinton. But he hasn’t offered us anything on substance. While he shakes hands with Clinton supporters, he flatly tells those working for the Clinton camp that he won’t pick her as V.P. Meanwhile, his staff dismisses Clinton, falsely leaking she’d be conceding on Tuesday when in fact she would do it later in the week.
-Yes, I agree with the earlier poster. He’s not doing anything meaningful to reach us. Shaking my hand doesn’t get my vote, or spouting platitudes about Hillary Clinton isn’t going to work. He has spent 16 months trashing Hillary Clinton as ‘having teas.’ It will take a lot more than a couple weeks of handshakes and nice talk to get over what he’s said in the past. He’s either disingenuous or a typical politician. Which is it? If he really was a straight talker, then I have to take everything he has said in the past as what he really thinks.
-Oh I love it. First, we were racists, uneducated, country low lifes who live with their sisters in a trailer. Now, we are their best friend again. Wow, i feel so valued. Let me ask, when a woman gets battered by her husband and she keeps on going back to him again and again, because he tells her he loves her and he has “changed” is that woman an idiot? I am tired of Obama, he is a sleaze bag, who thinks he is entitled to be president.
-I will not be pushed, filed, stamped, indexed, briefed, debriefed or numbered. My vote is my own. Nor will I be shoved, belittled, demeaned, cajoled or otherwise bullied to vote for Obama just because he is the “democratic nominee”. No, he must EARN my vote, and just because i voted for Hillary in the primary does not mean that he is automatically ENTITLED to my vote and support. I loved my party, but I do not recognize it anymore: when you are called racist because you value substance over style and concrete plans over Pollyanna speeches, then something has went wrong. I am not saying I wont vote for Obama, but right now Nader looks a lot more attractive to me and I will stay home and not vote if I cant find someone who I think will make a good president.
Good times.
NotUrEvryDayWEzl: No, I meant to make that comment to articulate moran: but I failed, because I am a moran.
They were just apprehensive because they’d heard about the Muslim preference for summary executions.
…MUHAHAHAHAHAHA! Silly Clint-Tards this is all part of our master plan to force your kidney’s into renal failure. What we do is pump you full of soda and coffee and when your bladders are ready to burst we block you from going to the restroom by pretending to actually like you!!! Nothing is more satisfying than watching the whites of your eyes turn yellower than John McCain’s teeth!
I resent the implication that I meet the minimum threshold of human decency.
Now where did I put my granny-beating stick?
tunamelt: That makes SO much more sense. Well, you have been redeemed. Clintards could learn from your example.
sweetladyirony: Greatest. Movie. EVER.
Doglessliberal: I agree. I mean, you hang with Hillary for that long, and any civility must be a real shock. It’s must be wierd for the pantsuit crowd.
sweetladyirony: Bless you, child, and your appreciation for the film “PCU”. Funny you should bring it up because I’m pretty sure “This penis party’s got to go. Hey, hey! Ho, ho!” was Hillary’s intended campaign song.
What should have happened is when the Obamas embraced the Clinton supporters, their torsos turned to Skittles. Because we all know that Black people have that power.
It must of been a shock to see that obama fans don’t have claws, horn and no one got the evil eye. I mean fuck, no one made the Clintards were their blue hats at the rally.
tunamelt: Is ok, we all have our moments.
Wonks I cannot stop vomitting at the most pathetic case of womanly subservience and ass kissing I have ever witnessed.
MSNBC’s Andrea Mitchell, tough Pentagon and Washington insider reporter of men’s stff, just bent over so low as to be speechless on the air against Carly Fiorono, the HPQueen and new Republican Victory Schmictory SpokesMAN.
While Fiorina slammed Mitchell and the DNC and Obama, and took over the show Mitchell sat silent and meek ands made no attempt to argue or counter one false word said.
Everyday the medias silence grows louder and louder.
The Real JR Revisted: These folks are never going to vote for Barry. No matter what he does, he will be “cajoling” them or pandering. I hope they just keep feeding on all that rage until their hearts explode. Hopefully before November.
The Real JR Revisted: Who is this diva “Ben Smith”. McAuliffe’s nomme de bloggue?
I hope that, after the hugs, all the Clinton supporters had “kick me” signs on their backs.
Michelle Obama is TOTALLY going to bringing home the FLILF-Lovers vote. She hawt.
Cicada: Totally agree.
I’ve been saying for a while that these insulated “Clintards” are much like those who go insane and rabid over the whole Team Aniston/Brangelina batshittery. Their worldview is that “they” are the victims to manipulative and overbearing men and therefore anything the men do or say is bullshit. There is no case-by-case basis here. It’s across the Board.
They live vicariously through these glamorous “victim” heroines, in this case Jennifer Aniston and HRC, and apply each and every time they’ve been wronged by some jackass guy that they chose a billionty years ago to these situations.
So Obama will always be that smooth-talking, clean cut, handsome guy who just wants to use them, abuse them and leave. And Brad will always be that guy who wanted something that his relationship at the time wasn’t giving him so he moved on and had the nerve to indeed move on and be happy when he’s supposed to be miserable their entire lives.
It’s dumb. It’s self prophesizing. ANd it’s limiting to the person who obsesses over such things. And even though its really sad, it’s also annoying so no wonder people just roll their eyes and walk away thus proving their victimhood further.
Jesus, sorry for the rant.
jagorev: I bet they were forced to use the WOMEN’S ONLY RESTROOM. Is there no end to Barack Hussein Obama’s treatment of women as second-class citizens?
Brilliant.
*wipes coffee off computer screen*
jagorev: I agree, Eclectablog. Simply well done.
Eclectablog: I’ve got to agree with that. She turns profile and I can’t think straight. Barry O is a lucky dude.
AngryBlakGuy: Just like a nice white victory speech!
The Real JR Revisted: Reading me just reminded me of an episode of Secrect Lives of Women I just saw on stalkers.
What did they expect? Babies roasting on a spit?
Sara:
Laughing, she spoke of how she decided she needed to make a trip to the restroom before Obama’s speech. Again, people kept stopping her to shake her hand.
In fairness, they only let her use the “Old, White Women Restroom.”
shortsshortsshorts: Only after they are mocked.
Check Out My Rack: That may be one of the most hilarious mental images ever. Thank you.
The Real JR Revisted: Yep, that sounds about right.
I’ve been really trying not to rub salt into their wounds… but I’ve been amazed at how some hardcore Hillary supporters seem to think that Obama owes Clinton something for winning on his own merits; That having a better strategy and getting more votes than her was stealing; and yet, somehow, the other candidates don’t owe her anything? I mean, there’s some kind of weird “woman-scorned” mentality going on here that has nothing to do with Obama, really. Obama doesn’t have to grovel, beg and send candy and teddy bears like a naughty cheating boyfriend to Edwards, Richardson or their supporters, it’s got me a bit flummoxed. I’ve seen the other candidates and the press treating her like an equal, but Clinton’s slumberparty can’t hack it and demand that everyone throws softballs at her, it’s like some kind of bizarro-world not-really-feminism. The sad thing is that Hillary is a tough broad that can totally deal with whatever comes her way, but she’s insisted on playing this weepy-girl card to get her supporters all riled up, which makes her a disingenuous bitch in my book.
In two days, Barry has pimptimidated Joe Lieberman near the senate floor AND introduced a roomful of Hillary supporters to concepts like “basic human decency” and “winning graciously” and “choosing to not act like a douche”.
obfuscator: Yeah, it’s all so very confusing innit?
The Clintards will slowly come to realize that the Obama campaign is not a cross between the Nat Turner Rebellion and Mandingo.
sweetladyirony: No PCU reference will ever go missed while I am on watch. One of the most underrated comedies of the 90’s.
Lionel Hutz Esq.: I, for one, will treat my Hilltard companions as they “deserve” to be treated hereinafter. However, “deserve” shall remain undefined.
weirdiowasculpture:
Are those TRUCK NUTZ?
Principal Skinner: “All right, Nibbles– now chew through my ball sack!”