HILLARY CLINTON  1:08 pm June 4, 2008

Lanny Davis Continues Remarkable Streak Of Douchebaggery

by Jim Newell

Lanny Davis, the staunch Clinton ally and textbook definition of why our society hates lawyers, has spent the last month or two or sixteen making a fool of himself as he tries to ruin Obama’s chances in November. During the Pennsylvania primary he noted how pathetic a candidate Obama is; he comically melted down on national teevee during the Indiana primary, while explaining how Obama’s lead is illegitimate; he fueled the rage Clinton backers were fake-feeling by chastising Obama for mentioning Bill Richardson as a potential VP; he decided it would be fair to give Hillary 77% of Michigan’s delegates, and when that didn’t happen, he ran around the DNC Rules and Bylaws Committee meeting like a 12-year-old. After treating Obama and the entire world so fairly, he is now circulating a “petition” for Obama to name Hillary his vice president. Somehow, he will find a way (or four) to sue when Obama doesn’t pick her. [CNN]


Hola wonkerados.

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MadMangosteen June 4, 2008 at 1:11 pm

something about this primary has driven Clinton supporters, from the lofty Lanny Davis to the lowly blog commenter, completely and clinically insane and they should be put down for the good of the community as such

tunamelt June 4, 2008 at 1:11 pm

Can we start circulating a petition for him to not pick her as VP?

shortsshortsshorts June 4, 2008 at 1:12 pm

Barry is not black, and not white,
Therefore the First cause of action:

Tawmn June 4, 2008 at 1:12 pm

Why do Lawyers wear neckties?

To hold back the foreskin.

ManchuCandidate June 4, 2008 at 1:14 pm

He’s one guy who I’d enjoy watch turning blue while he holds his breath.

Wah Wah Cries Lanny
Sore ass Loser moans and wails
Nation laughs with glee

NotUrEvryDayWEzl June 4, 2008 at 1:14 pm

What we need is a Clinton Quarantine. We should force them all to reside permanently in Chappaqua… kinda like Paulville, but leaving the bitter taste in your mouth when you wake up and don’t remember the previous night’s douchbaggery.

SayItWithWookies June 4, 2008 at 1:15 pm

circulating a “petition” for Obama to name Hillary his vice president.
I don’t understand…does this mean Obama’s turned down Hillary’s offer for him to be her VP?

Son of Mark Penn June 4, 2008 at 1:16 pm

I’m circulating a petition to have Clinton pick Obama as her VP!

AfghanVet June 4, 2008 at 1:16 pm

Hard to let go of the coatails, especially when the coat you are holding onto is going nowhere. Slowly but surely, these panty wastes will be ignored.

metropolitan June 4, 2008 at 1:17 pm

i think you’re confusing douchebaggery with the honorable loyalty that lenny davis holds in his heart. if you weren’t so sexist you’d get it.
and if obama doesn’t make hillary the VP lanny davis is going to hold his breath and kick and scream and soil his pants.

masterdebater June 4, 2008 at 1:17 pm

There ought to be a way we could all sue, as a class of aggrieved persons, for “having to listen to his shit”.

DoctorCulturae June 4, 2008 at 1:19 pm

[re=6631]tunamelt[/re]: Brilliant idea! Somebody start a site and I’m there!

upperleft June 4, 2008 at 1:19 pm

This is the kind of person that Mrs. Clinton chose to surround herself with.
Larry and Harold don’t give a rat’s ass about anything but themselves, and
that’s apparently a trait Mrs. Clinton shares with them.

MadMangosteen June 4, 2008 at 1:19 pm

[re=6644]AfghanVet[/re]: Slowly but surely, these panty wastes will be ignored.

I’m with you: these jokers are a total waste of panties

RonaldReagansHair June 4, 2008 at 1:21 pm

One CNN commenter has it exactly right. Perhaps someone here can direct me to the petition NOT to have Hillary on the ticket? There’s got to be one. If not, let’s get it going.

queeraselvis v 2.0 June 4, 2008 at 1:21 pm

Barry’s first task as President is to order Ickes, Davis, Penn, and Hari-Kari Christian to immolate themselves in front of the White House. His second is to order Hillary and Bill to impale themselves atop the White House Christmas Chrismahanukawazaa pyracantha bush.

DoctorCulturae June 4, 2008 at 1:22 pm

[re=6655]MadMangosteen[/re]: Camille Paglia has a very good notion about this:


wallythepug June 4, 2008 at 1:22 pm

He’s trying anything so he doesn’t actually have to work for a living.

Lionel Hutz Esq. June 4, 2008 at 1:25 pm

Laugh all you want. But some day you might need a lawyer to save your ass.

Or they might just put it away.

Kingbee June 4, 2008 at 1:26 pm

[re=6644]AfghanVet[/re]: At first I thought you misspelled “pantywaists”, but “panty wastes” is even better.

Carrie_Okie June 4, 2008 at 1:27 pm

In the first 100 days of the Obama administration he should repeal DADT and get gays openly in the military; then pass universal health care. Then he should invite everyone in America except the Clintonistas over for a barbecue; hold a televised press conference and give Hilliary the finger whilst screaming, “Suck it!”

tunamelt June 4, 2008 at 1:28 pm

[re=6652]DoctorCulturae[/re]: http://www.wonkette.com

MoodProcessor June 4, 2008 at 1:28 pm

This guy looks like Ben Stein’s evil twin that never made it.

Delicious June 4, 2008 at 1:30 pm

And this is why Obama needs to lance this Clinton boil before he becomes consumed by the sickness that is Billary and their cesspool of ammoral sycophants-for-hire.

DoctorCulturae June 4, 2008 at 1:31 pm

[re=6677]tunamelt[/re]: ???

NotUrEvryDayWEzl June 4, 2008 at 1:31 pm

[re=6675]Carrie_Okie[/re]: He should also announce that in honor of the Clinton’s he going to put their face on the penny, and then simultaneously announce that he’s getting rid of the penny since it is a monetarily useless coin.

Lord Humungus June 4, 2008 at 1:31 pm

At what point does the rest of America start acting like adults and IGNORE these temper tantrums?

Tits_LaRue June 4, 2008 at 1:39 pm


What Kind Of Name Is
Lanny, Anyway? Sounds Like
New Kind Of Tampon


Lanny: So Stubborn
A Resistant Stain Even
OxyClean Can’t Fix


Lanny’s Delusions
Cannot Comfort Him Tonight
Needs Some Stronger Drugs


DoctorCulturae June 4, 2008 at 1:39 pm

[re=6687]Lord Humungus[/re]: Pre-cise-ly. O has been doing that and IMHO should start making even surer choices, like he has in the campaign, to ease. them. to. the. side. The party bigs surely know he needs to be unhindered from the used car dealers.

Where is Gore? Hello Al? Uh, we know you don’t want to interfere, but…. time to put the bitters in a time out.

lumpenprole June 4, 2008 at 1:40 pm

Given the freaks that ran her campaign into the ground, I wonder WTF a Hillary cabinet would have looked like…

weirdiowasculpture June 4, 2008 at 1:42 pm


Wow! Go Camille! Hillary’s male staffers are all “slick, geeky weasels or rancid, asexual cream puffs.” So which one is Lanny? Personally, I’m going with rancid, asexual cream puff.” Can we have a poll on this here, or do we have to go over to Daily Kos for that? This new site’s got me flummoxed.

johnbpt June 4, 2008 at 1:55 pm

Note to Lanny: The revolution has arrived. Guess what class of societal parasites is first up against the wall. C’mon Lanny, think!

Dreadful Gate June 4, 2008 at 1:55 pm

Up here where I come from, we call Lanny’s type a Shit Weasel. He covers himself in the excrement of his prey so he can get into their nests

tunamelt June 4, 2008 at 1:56 pm

[re=6684]DoctorCulturae[/re]: I meant, we should just pick a thread here and have that be our petition.

slavojzizek June 4, 2008 at 2:00 pm

This will undoubtedly be as effective as the three thousand other petitions circulating around telling China to get out of Tibet, Sudan to stop attacking Darfur, Israel out of the West Bank, etc….

PJ June 4, 2008 at 2:01 pm

Not to worry: he may not know what ‘petition’ means.


Hart88 June 4, 2008 at 2:02 pm

Lanny’s been a doucherocket for years; this is nothing new. I’d put him in the same category as perennial candidate/noted NBA heckler Robin Ficker.

Q June 4, 2008 at 2:03 pm

The Archies, “Sugar Sugar”…

Oh lyin’ diQhead
You got me loathin’ you
And you make me wanna hurl

Oh deranged fuQhead
You are a candy ass
And you make me wanna hurl

I just can’t believe the bullshit that comes outta you
(I just can’t believe it’s true)
I just can’t believe the Hillz puts up witg you
(I just can’t beieve it’s true)

Oh yes I’m bitter
You make me wanna hurl
and you got me hatin’ you


Stig O'Hara June 4, 2008 at 2:05 pm

A Robin Ficker reference!!!! NICE. GO BULLETS!!!! wait…. GO GIZZARDS!! BLIZZARDS?? What the @#$% are they called now?

Deepthroat June 4, 2008 at 2:33 pm

he’s no Barry Zuckerkorn.

hazmaq June 4, 2008 at 2:36 pm

The puffed drooling lips of legless Foxettes could almost top Lannys’ douching:

-”Democratic endgame continues as Obama seeks Clinton support” rolls the sticky ticker below.

-says dumbass #1 “How can [the Democrat] party come together when Hillary herself can’t come together”

-replies dumbass #2 “Hillary Clinton has played 2nd fiddle her whole life”

But Lannys’ claim that ‘she was gracious last night and did congratulate Obama” defies even the worst bullshit ever thrown by Fox.

graceless* June 4, 2008 at 2:38 pm

[re=6661]DoctorCulturae[/re]: It’s weird, much of the stuff she’s been writing lately I agree with? What’s up with that? I never used to like her. I guess I’ll have to reassess now.

ronaldpagan June 4, 2008 at 2:39 pm

[re=6742]Q[/re]: I love it!

graceless* June 4, 2008 at 2:41 pm

[re=6727]tunamelt[/re]: No. Wonkette only gets about 6 million hits. HRC will counter with the 17 million votes she got. We must be bigger. Let me check something, I’ll be bak.

graceless* June 4, 2008 at 2:42 pm

[re=6843]graceless*[/re]: I’ll be back.

tunamelt June 4, 2008 at 2:46 pm

[re=6855]graceless*[/re]: Oooh, make something happen.

TGY June 4, 2008 at 2:54 pm

Dear Mr. Davis,

Your petition is now before me. It will soon be behind me.


shortsshortsshorts June 4, 2008 at 3:01 pm


I thought this would make a great website counter for hillz.

heathenish June 4, 2008 at 3:39 pm


heathenish June 4, 2008 at 3:43 pm

what a great chance to use my favorite picture

bitchincamaro June 4, 2008 at 4:21 pm

If only Hilz was the type of girl who would never try to join
a club that would have her as a memeber, I think we’d all con-
sider rolling out the red carpet for the VP slot.

Mr. Herpes June 4, 2008 at 7:03 pm

Me thinks that every time Lanny looks at McHillary, he sees Vince Foster’s gory ghost hovering like Banquo, and god knows he doesn’t want to end up like ol’ Vince so he starts jabbering and stabbing at anyone and everyone — Hillary is Queen! Hillary is Queen! — Poor guy. You’d think the dumb skidmark would know James Carville when he sees him.

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