JIM GIBBONS DIVORCE INSANITY:

America’s worst governor and alcoholic adulterous sex-assaulter crook Jim Gibbons and his power-crazed wife Dawn are finally getting the divorce everybody always knew they’d get, and it’s going to be ugly, and the court documents are hilarious. [My Silver State/Las Vegas Gleaner]

About the author

A writer and editor of this website from 2006 to early 2012, Ken Layne is occassionally seen on Twitter and writes small books and is already haunting you from beyond (your) grave.

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Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here with a few helpful links to ease your transition to Disqus - Claiming Old Accounts - Claiming Your ID Comments - Turning off Disqus Notifications. And, as always, remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • loquaciousmusic

    We’re bringing sexy back!

    Yeah!

    How long do you think it’ll take Tony to log in?

  • loquaciousmusic

    By the way, that first comment was me, loquaciousmusic.

    Or was it TonyTheTiger…?

    You’ll never know!

    Grrrr!

  • threefingersneat

    “has shunned his wife without justification for that behavior.”

    Oh not, he di’int!

  • threefingersneat

    “…despite having vowed to not comment on the details of the breakup of the marriage, he specially breaks his vow of silence to defend. In short, by not stepping up and by not candidly admitting his fawning involvement with his frequent bar, lunch, dinner, and even grocery store companion, he has brought the spotlight down upon himself and upon the reason for the divorce.”

    Let’s see if I understand this correctly. By not admitting his involvement with the other girl, he breaks his vow of silence? Gibbo sure can attract the smart ones, can’t he?

  • Patty Dumpling

    I really enjoy the Flavor Flav-style bling that he’s wearing as he sips his Courvoisier.

  • ReelectTilden

    He didn’t lie about a blowjob, did he? ‘Cause that shit will not stand.

  • Botswana Meat Commission FC

    and even grocery store companion

    You can’t take your ho to the grocery sto!

  • WaldoJeffer’sHead

    “…she is blameless and that lust is the real villain here.”

    I don’t see Lust on trial. Where is the justice!?

  • Patty Dumpling

    “For just one example, even when, after consuming copious amounts of alcohol, and under the cover of darkness, in a garage in Las Vegas, the plaintiff was accused of assaulting a young woman, bearing a striking resemblance, to the ‘other woman’ referenced, below, that woman, too, like his wife now, was trashed and the public was, again, misled”

    ‘That woman was trashed’. And so was the person who wrote that sentence using 14 commas. Just hammered.

  • Godless Liberal

    The more I look at that picture the more I wonder why he is wearing a Gumby hat.

  • TJBeck

    I just registered “Tony the Tiger” with the spaces, but I’m having trouble logging in with it.

  • loquaciousmusic

    I posted this picture earlier, but it didn’t go through because there was something blocking the tubes. Anyway, I don’t think it would be misogynist at all to blame Ana, do you?

  • TJBeck

    So when does my avatar show up?

  • TJBeck

    @loquaciousmusic: We have to craft our own “REPLY” syntax.

  • loquaciousmusic

    Damn! The picture didn’t post. The Internet is poopy.

    Here’s the link.

    http://www.kscakes.com/LolCats/Uploads/Saved/im-in-ur-wonkettz-wreakin-havok.jpg

  • Botswana Meat Commission FC

    consuming copious amounts of alcohol, and under the cover of darkness, in a garage in Las Vegas

    You just know this isn’t going anywhere good.

  • loquaciousmusic

    Holy shitstorm, did you read the document? It has passages like this one:

    After all, it is only a coincidence that she moved out of her marital home too and is
    seeking a divorce at the same time he is, too. Note that he doesn’t mention that fact or deny
    it in his rebuttal. Right!

    Who’s her lawyer, James Patterson?

  • norbziness

    Senile pimpin’ ain’t easy.

  • Advocatus_Diaboli

    “… lust is the real villain here.”

    That is fucking priceless!

  • blogfather

    I tried to register a name and it said it was “busy mixing up a can of pink paint” when I clicked on the link in my email.

  • TJBeck

    There is no preview comment option. Lets see if image posting works.
    html way

    fourm way
    [img=http://img229.imageshack.us/img229/8337/bigpipedd2.th.jpg]

    old way:
    <img src=”http://www.houseofcuss.co.uk/thepipe/pics/bigpipe.jpg”

  • Serolf Divad

    So do we have to create all new accounts for the new Wonkette?

  • user-of-owls

    re: Serolf Divad

    “…the redesign is the real villain here.”

  • Serolf Divad

    OK, just testing the ol’ Avatar here.

  • loquaciousmusic

    Boy, I just hope that everyone who registers will get commenting privileges so that the “Comments” section of Wonkette can become the dumbed down, error-riddled, bitchy younger brother of Consumerist.

  • metropolitan

    so i don’t get it, are we still supposed to be funny or can we just be self righteously lefty?

  • Rev. Peter Lemonjello

    testing

  • metropolitan

    what’s with this “you’re posting comments too quickly, slow down”? should i just send my comments in a postcard and check back next week?

  • MathewBrooks

    With this new wonkette can i still make fun of draculacunt?

  • Indi

    @Loquaciousmusic: The new wonkette design: providing the freedom for all to comment in the same vein as the jackass who yells “Freebird!” at a non-Skynyrd concert.

    Horrible, horrible freedom.

  • ReelectTilden

    So, are they posting anything new today, or are we just going to talk about Jim Gibbons’s train wreck of a marriage until we grow old and die?

  • blogfather

    @loquaciousmusic: Ah c’mon. I love to see how lost the consumerist commenters look when they log on to the Wonkette.

  • Dave J.

    My comments are are to be less interesting and HTML-y without the leet preview function.

  • SayItWithWookies

    Hello? Hello? It’s dark and I’m frightened.

  • TGY

    After more than twenty years of marriage, the Plaintiff has deserted, abandoned, and
    has shunned his wife without justification for that behavior

    Hell hath no fury like a woman shunned!

  • TGY

    @SayItWithWookies: It is better to light a man afire than curse the darkness.

  • blogfather

    All 2 of my followers are lost forever now.

  • Rev. Peter Lemonjello

    Who do I speak to about getting my muffin basket?

  • Godless Liberal *

    Crap. Somehow Wonkette commenters (myself included) are already 67% less funny on the new comment system.

  • loquaciousmusic

    I AM STILL A STAR COMMENTER IN MY HEART, GODDAMMIT!

  • loquaciousmusic

    There. I just changed my avatar. That’ll show those Consumerist readers who’s boss!

  • Godless Liberal *

    @loquaciousmusic: Sometimes you gotta make your own star, man.

  • SayItWithWookies

    @TGYYeah, but cursing the darkness is fun, too.
    Well as someone who has dealt with his share of screaming end-users before, I sympathize with our relocated Wonkette overlords.

  • floraway

    There is a lot of important news not being reported by Wonkette today. Look, I expect to learn that Ricky Martin endorsed Hillz today from you, not Ben Smith.

  • metropolitan

    if the editor’s can’t ban commenters anymore then i will quit trying to be funny and i will instead post multiple paragraph theories on politics and crosslink to pages full of adsense ads.

  • SayItWithWookies

    In other news, McCrone’s chief economic advisor, Phil Gramm, was a lobbyist for a Swiss banking firm while he helped craft McCrone’s economic policy.
    McCrone Bald-Pate Deep in Lobbyists
    Gramm was still actively lobbying for UBS on March 26, when he contributed to a speech in which McCain recommended further deregulation as a response to the mortgage crisis. Talking Points Memo notes that “UBS is among the banks worst hit by the global credit crisis,” with about $37 billion in assets tied to bad US mortgages.

    UBS has now told members of a private banking team which advised wealthy American clients to avoid travel to the US, following the indictment of a former senior executive for helping a billionaire evade taxes.

    Hey, I wonder if this means Gramm’s going to be indicted for abetting tax evasion too — he could be the first cabinet secretary to conduct business from a minimum security prison.

  • blogfather

    @loquaciousmusic: Respect my whore diamonds!

  • V572625694

    Shoot–thought I might get banned. Oh well…more hours to waste. Beats working.

  • blogfather

    I wouldn’t let me create Antonio the Tiger, which is the cereal characters REAL name. Why else do you think he put such an emphasis on grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreat!

  • Pop Socket

    @Serolf Divad: Glad to see you made it through the wormhole. The place wouldn’t be the same without you.

  • loudmouthredhead

    Teh login thingy is all weirdy-like now…

    I personally think he looks like a russian scullery maid

  • oracle

    Where is the proof?
    I’m not doubting the story necessarily. I just want to see proof.
    I see no reason as yet to take her word for anything.
    Unless we’re supposed to take her word for it because she’s the wife (and a woman, therefore entitled to special, separate and unequal treatment in America’s “egalitarian” eyes) and he’s a Republican.
    But that would be hypocrisy, wouldn’t it?

    Your hate will kill you.