Wonkette

i LOVE the use of the biblical verb "sup"

Tomorrow's headline: Meredith Vieira diagnosed with contamination by 13 different top-secret pathogens.

I'm surprised that Cheney didn't have the whole thing blurred out.

What is with Lynne Cheney and those turned up collars? She looks like Dracula's bride.

This was actually done at the same studio NASA did all their "moon landing" stuff from.We all know no human being is allowed into the Halls of Mordor.

Did they show her the well of souls under the cellar stairs?

Is it just me, or are Lynne Cheney and Cindy McCain the same person? Also, the entire library looks like it consists of those "Buy 8 Books, Get One Free" dealies from the Franklin Mint.

@san antone rose: Yeah, "looks like"

...too bad they didnt show her the portal to hell they keep in the basement, I always wanted to see one of those!

@queeraselvis: Yeah, "looks like"

@PeteJayhawk: ...can they REDACT a video?

I liked this room best:

@AngryBlakGuy: ...and I wonder why they didnt show the coffin that he sleeps in?

@mathewbrooks: I'm sure if Lynne had pressed the right book, the wall would open to reveal a secret passage leading directly to Dubya's playroom. Or to the backroom of the DC Eagle. Not that they're the same, of course...

Next week, Dick himself will conduct the tour of Obersalzberg, their country retreat.

@Serolf Divad: The Anti-Torture Act of 2005 was laced with holes so Cheney can be so very proud of his new playroom.

@queeraselvis: Wait, what secret passage?

And if by "backroom" you mean "managers office" i can assure you, its hardly a secret.

Where's the map of Dante's inferno when you need it?

*from

@queeraselvis: Those aren't real books. They're hollowed-out fake books where Lynne stores her vodka and forbidden lesbi-pr0n videos.

MY god, she looks like a creepy, possessed, marionette! Someone hit that once? Really?

What? No dead baby sandwiches in the kitchen?

"Meredith, come here. Open this door."

sqeeeaaaakkkkk....

"This is Dick's personal torture chamber and S&M dungeon. He and Rummy built this by themselves, with some help from Condi, Andy, Scott and Scooter. There--over there, in the corner. See that? That's a complete recreation of the basement scene in 'Pulp Fiction!' That's my favorite. What? That noise? Oh, that's just Dick greasing up the waterboard. We use that on journalists. Are you ready? We're so glad you came by to visit. Too bad no one will see your stupid little report..."

@masterdebater: For the third time.. Yeah, "looks like"

@queeraselvis: Yeah, I call bullshit until they show the sling.

@masterdebater: Dude, Dick ain't exactly a prize, himself.

Or were you talking about Meredith?

@queeraselvis: Now if she had a secret passage to the Baltimore Eagle, I might be interested.

Mystery solved! In the Cheney lair the Constitution is merely a triple-masted war frigate! It all comes clear now!

"Banality of Evil"

Or possibly "bananality" when referring to daiquiris, and I've met some pretty evil daiquiris in my time.

@Harvey Birdman: You know very well there is no sling. There is the bar managers desk and little else. It is cold & forbidding or warm and inviting depending on your perspective.

I have a much better masturbatorium

I was woken up every morning for a year by the secret underground demolition going on, and I can't even look at the pedophile bunker he built? I want my fucking tax dollars back.

"Once inside the masterbatoreum, you hear the looped track of duck calls sounding in rhythm with an oil derrick. A poster of Lord Humungus from The Road Warrior adorns the wall in front of the Lazy-boy, with a quote stenciled above in Army green : "Again you have made me unleash my dogs of war."

Ok now we are getting confused, is it a masturbatorium or an arboretum?

...I wonder if has one of those pits from the silence of the lambs?

"IT PUTS THE LOTION BASKET!!!"

@queeraselvis: Actually, the Cheney's bought their entire library at "Books by the Foot".

I liked the part where Mrs. Cheney talked about the long standing tradtion of veeps using snuff.

Vieira has no clue.

@Johnny Zhivago's Cat: "The Foot"? Is that what they're calling Ann Coulter these days?

@Rev. Peter Lemonjello: "We just took it up a notch..to snuff porn! BAM!"

@nachoproblem: Foot? Nah. "The Hand" or "The Schlong", maybe but not "The Foot".

@LittlePig: "Books By The Schlong" has a nice ring to it. Good name for a band.

Apart from the trophy studded War Room and its magnificent wall maps of Iran, Massachusetts and the Soviet Union (which Vieria, the child of job-stealing immigrants, did not ask to see), there is a portal in the attic. If you enter it, you will step into the Halliburton HQ in Dubai and see the waterboarding of various junior executives and relatives of Danny Thomas.

@AngryBlakGuy: If by basket, you mean dumb waiter, then yes.

I'm starting to see where Hillary got her inspiration for those scary pant suits. Those tow look eerily similar.

@audicityofhope: Shit, I meant *two*

Now that can't be Cheney's dining table! Where are the leather straps? Where's the blood bucket?

you've got to wonder about the woman that somehow agreed to marry that man. i can't even begin to imagine what she did to deserve a lifetime with him. i'm almost a little frightened by her.

@ masterdebater: we're talking about getting f*cked by dick cheney, i think the bigger question is how the hell he ever tapped anything?

Feh. I have no interest in seeing where Cheney "lives"- no, the real scoop will be when someone gets access to the plush crypt complex that is being prepared for him in the salt veins under Yucca Flats. Only there can his vampyric husk be safe from those who would drive a stake through his cash-grabbing hand and try to dress him in a union-made suit, which is the only way to kill one of his kind. Oh, wait- there's no such thing as a union-made suit. I guess he's safe, then. But the miles of tunnels will still be needed to house the corpses of his servants when the time comes...