Cindy McCain’s Tell-All Memoir Due Out This Fall!

Xanax cocktail recipes on p. 211If you ever wondered about the secret lives of pill-popping blondes but were too lazy to crack Valley of the Dolls, future First Lady Cindy McCain will help you out. In her memoir, due out just a few months before her angry midget husband is crowned Emperor of America, she will reveal all of her secrets to staying healthy, wealthy, and married to a physically and emotionally fragile war veteran. In other words, the book will be a sort of Less Than Zero meets Deceptively Delicious with a sprinkling of Old Yeller. It will sell one trillion copies after Oprah adds it to her Book Club. [On Politics]

About the author

Sara K. Smith was Wonkette's morning editor from 2008 to 2010, and now contributes a weekly (?!) column to Wonkette, to prove she still loves you all!

View all articles by Sara K. Smith
What Others Are Reading

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.