Diarrhea Made JFK Bungle Bay Of Pigs Invasion

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None of this would have been possible without the runsRemember the last young handsome half-Kenyan President we had before Barack Obama? Yes, Jack Kennedy! You’ll recall he assembled a band of Cuban nationals to re-invade Guam, and then he tore Nikita Khrushchev a new one while having sex with Marilyn Monroe and Angie Dickinson simultaneously. None of it would have been possible without drugs, and the excuse for the drugs was diarrhea.

Yes, it’s true! In a new book called In Sickness and In Power, author David Owen writes that Kennedy had “Constant and acute diarrhoea and a recurrence of his urinary tract infection” during the Bay of Pigs invasion.

JFK’s troubles didn’t end there, however. He was also on all kinds of speed to treat his Addison’s disease, which made him be an asshole to the Soviet leader Nikita Khrushchev. Fortunately by the time the Cuban missile crisis happened, he was off the drugs and addicted to nothing more harmful than massage.

The drug abuse of John F Kennedy [Comment Central]

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Sara K. Smith was Wonkette's morning editor from 2008 to 2010, and now contributes a weekly (?!) column to Wonkette, to prove she still loves you all!

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