Wonkette

Oh look, it’s Cougar Cindy McCain and her Albino Dwarf, John McCain. He cannot go outside in the sun, because his species lives underground somewhere, in the Shire. Do we really want to have a “presumed GOP nominee” who can’t even go outside? Last time around we had a GOP nominee who can’t handle his liquor, so he has to drink O’Doul’s and eat candy. By 2012 the Republican nominee will be transgendered. [VOA/AP]