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Here’s where we are: If you have any trace amount of “metal” on your person, or in your luggage, or anywhere in your life, you are a terrorist and cannot board airplanes. Did you forget, Average American? You are never supposed to do that. Some lady did forget, however, and was forced to remove her nipple piercings with a pair of pliers at airport security. She is very upset, too!

Nipple piercings can be melted into liquid metal and shaped into Terrorism. Everyone knows this:

Hamlin said she told the woman she was wearing nipple piercings. The agent called over her male colleagues, one of whom said she would have to remove the jewelry, Hamlin said.

Hamlin said she could not remove them and asked whether she could instead display her pierced breasts in private to the female agent. But several other male officers told her she could not board her flight until the jewelry was out, she said.

She was taken behind a curtain and managed to remove one bar-shaped piercing but had trouble with the second, a ring.

She asked for a pair of pliers as a last resort. She got the ring out with much pain and “said she heard male TSA agents snickering as she took out the ring.”

They then let her pass without removing her belly button ring, which she detonated in-flight and blew up the entire airplane. And this is what we call airport security?

Traveler says she was forced to remove nipple ring [AP/CNN]

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