Wonkette

Faithfully chronicled love affair with Egg McMuff, eh? I love serial porn!

OMG... suddenly I feel like a bad person. If only I'd known the guy was on his deathbed I wouldn't have been so harsh. Not that that would have made them any less inedible, of course.

Tucker always denied his love for the Egg McMuffin, but now he silently weeps as his life spirals further into the realm of miserable failure. He should get a new show, so he can be canceled, again, forever.

I abandoned this geezer for the McGriddle a few years ago.

It is a proven scientific fact that slathering your body with Egg McMuffins will cause all chest hair to fall out and provoke prolonged episodes of spasmodic salsa dancing.

@Serolf Divad:
don't feel bad, crappy hour today was discussing making their own homemade egg mcmuffins. i think the end of the egg mcmuffin era was coming to a close was in the air.

He was a pioneer who helped raise the obesity levels of Aussies and Kiwis so Americans wouldn't be the only fat ones, by dumping on them the Massive McMuffin - with ketchup, bacon, egg, American cheese and two sausage patties- not sold in the US. I wonder why it didn't have vegemite.

I actually made myself a little circular egg mold out of a tuna can so that I could make them at home and save 2-3 bucks. My wife likes them. I think they're kinda nasty (who wants American cheese on an egg?).

89, huh? Must not've eaten many of his own creations to get that far.

This is just further proof that there is no G@d. If there were, S/He'd have "taken" Poofter Carlson and his teeny-tiny huevos and left the productive eggo-geezer behind. Oh Lord, why hast thou NOT forsaken Carlson?

@Lazy Media: Who wants American cheese on anything, or by itself? I order them with no cheese.

Is it too late to burn his creation in effigy? Or perhaps grill it a bit too long.

As a former road warrior, I can say that compared to the other greasy fast food breakfast sandwiches, the "Eggamuffin" is some fine behind the wheel dining.
I always add a few generous splashes of Trappeys Red Bull sauce, always kept readily at hand in my center console.
If you don't have that, just ask the McClerk for some salsa.
It qualifies as a vegetable, I think.
RIP, Mr. Peterson.

OK, Now lets all take a moment to mentally picture Tucker Carlson covered in melted American Pasteurized Prepared Cheese Product.

I think I'm gonna finally go vegan now.

@aardvark_gumbo: Makes an OK grilled cheese sandwich, and is edible on a hamburger, but yeah, that's about the only use for it.

My opinion on this industro-culinary creation:
Go hollandaise or go home.

@biminitwst:
The Chick Fil-A breakfast biscuit is the greatest thing ever. It vanquishes the North in a way Robert E. Lee never could.

My fav was the sausage McMuffin, on the dollar menu. When I was homeless, it save my butt.

That picture of Tucker is making my ovaries disintergrate.
Egg McMuffin, meh. I'm...well I was more a biscuit girl. I can't eat much McFood anymore.

@Botswana Meat Commission FC: There used to be an egg mcmuffin with Hollandaise sauce, but for a limited time only. I used to make and sell them, but can't remember what they were called. Probably Eggs McBenedict or some shit.

Tucker Carlson was once at a McDonalds. Some hungry guy got high off the grease fumes and ran a fry up his leg...gayly. He beat the shit of of him, cause that's how Tucker rolls.