Hillary Clinton Releases Mountain Of Papers That No One Will Ever Read

Hillary Clinton finally buckled to the Republican/Ken Starr/Barack Obama attack machine today and released over 11,000 pages of documents that will offer transparency and insight into her tenure as First Lady, if anybody ever gets around to reading that crap. Now the public shall know what happened on every sad, grinding day in the eight-year stint that made an exciting, vivacious, interesting and personable woman with tremendous political potential into the embittered hack she is today. Join us on this magical journey through the past!

Here is what Hillary Clinton did as First Lady: she got on planes and stayed in hotels with a coterie of attendants including [redacted]. Occasionally, the band played "Hail to the Chief" and she had "the option of working the rope line."

In other words, she spent eight years plotting to socialize medicine while fucking Sinbad in secret UN-sanctioned Bosnian resorts.

 Clinton Records From '90s to Be Released on Wednesday [New York Times]

 First Lady Hillary Rodham Clinton's Daily Schedules [William J. Clinton Presidential Library]