REPUBLICANS  1:45 pm March 18, 2008

Rep. Michele Bachmann Hates Terrorists, Compact Fluorescents

by Sara K. Smith

Babies are a renewable resource!Minnesota Representative Michele Bachmann recently took a little break from her baby-farming to remind voters of how crazy she is. She assured her constituents that God had not abandoned them in Iraq and called global warming “voodoo.” She also warned them about a terrible place called “Democrat land” where something is horrifically wrong with the phone systems. More gibberish after the jump.

At the Sherburne County Republican convention, nice Minnesotans and Representative Michele Bachmann gathered to elect delegates to the state convention and hammer out their party platform. Bachmann suggested they come out strongly against earth-destroying compact fluorescent lightbulbs:

“By 2012, incandescent light bulbs will be no more. Fluorescent bulbs are more polluting because of their mercury content. We are working on the light bulb bill. If the Democrats can hose up a light bulb don’t trust them with the country.”

She also talked about the mythical Democrat Land, in which 80% of terrorist-stopping opportunities are suppressed by the government.

“Eighty percent of all cell phone calls are routed through the United States and we can intercept them and get this information to help keep our troops safe,” Bachmann said. “Not in Democrat land!”

America, do you want these terrorists to be tying up our phone lines or not? If no, then vote for the gal who hates lightbulbs.

16B Candidates Kiffmeyer, Lumley Attend Convention [West Sherburne Tribune]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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