Who Is This ‘Creepy Gnome’ Terrorizing South America?

We cannot write a better introduction than this: “A town in South America is living in fear after several sightings of a ‘creepy gnome’ that locals claim stalks the streets at night. The midget — which wears a pointy hat and has a distinctive sideways walk — was caught on video last week by a terrified group of youngsters.” This sidling wicket goblin, who is terrorizing Argentinian Mexicans, made one teenager “so scared after seeing that thing that we had to take him to the hospital.”

Hmm… a hobbit gnome terrorizing illegals? This is no mystery at all.

TOM TANCREDO IS LOOSE IN ARGENTINA:

His hobbit kin political nemesis, Dennis Kucinich, is at home terrorizing Americans with taxes, and his wife.

‘Creepy gnome’ terrorises town [Sun (UK)]

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About the author

Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined Wonkette.com in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

View all articles by Jim Newell

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2 comments

  1. Kristina

    Argentinian Mexicans? What? Really? Ok…that sounds like you have no idea of not even basic geography, so please redeem yourself and tell me what were you referring to. You do know that those are two different countries right, …just like Mexico and the US?

    Also,

    “This sidling wicket goblin, who is terrorizing Argentinian Mexicans, made one teenager “so scared after seeing that thing that we had to take him to the hospital.”
    Hmm… a hobbit gnome terrorizing illegals?”

    Ok,so… if they are loose in South America…and, lets say…you meant to say they were Argentinians…were they in a different country? Because if they are in Argentina…(and by the way, Argentina is in South America)and they are Argentinians…how can they be illegal?? Really, this whole post makes no sense and makes you sound way too dumb.

  2. Kristina

    or..did u mean to say that Mexicans are illegal even in Mexico? Either way,, there is no way to fix this one, just delete it, it will be the best.

Comments are closed.