Wonkette

We can all quit writing about politics now because America Has Spoken. Our next President will be a hairy, scrunch-faced “monster” by the name of Hillary Pugham Clinton!Correctly sensing the mood of the nation, discerning readers of Sarasota Magazine voted overwhelmingly for Pugham Clinton in the Pug Primary. Just like the senator from New York, this poor dog wears terribly loud, unflattering brocade tops. But might “she” be disqualified for having what looks suspiciously like a wang?

Sad Barack Pugbama stands fretfully in a puddle of his own urine, wondering what happened to his momentum.

And tragic Pug McCain chokes here on his own tongue. He actually came in fourth behind Mike Huckapug, who must be seen in all his corpulent glory to be believed.

Photos courtesy of Sarasota Magazine.

Pug Primary [Sarasota Magazine]