Wonkette
Dear Editor,
I am done. As much as I enjoy reading the adolescent snarky head-lines and the news that they allege to describe, I am fed up. Wonkette consistently uses Senator Clinton as a punching bag. It is my opinion that Wonkette is as culpable as the rest of the low brow general media with their emotionally laden bludgeons on Senator Clinton.
Although this is far from a comprehensive list hear some of the things I have read recently that stick out in other left wing press blogs: Clinton is braying rather then laughing, can’t trust her, she barged in to a restaurant rather then entered to campaign, can’t trust her and she’s calculated rather then nuanced and smart, and today Wonkette reports on how awful and stupid she was for thanking the people in Florida for voting for her. And by the way their support doesn’t count! Come fucking on.
Whether Senator Clinton took any delegates is a news item not the real story. My friend in Florida is pretty upset that you and the rest of the media talking heads think her vote means nothing. Yea! Another disenfranchised American is told to STFU. Good job at eating our young Wonkette. Good job at showing women what they are in for if they are smart and try to have any power in our world. Keep it up and you will see a backlash by women at the polls. I am sick of it and other women are sick of it too. I am taking Wonkette off of my reader.
Sincerely,
Reverend Allyson K. Day
Comments
wow that is one angry lady, but what she doesnt realize is that there is equal hatred around here
Talking heads? Where're the heads? Where's the talking? Maybe "typing fingers" or "writing wise-asses" would be better.
She didn't even mention "swampsow." Jeez, I guess it hasn't caught on yet...
Fucking Unitarians....
"Reverend Allyson K. Day"
Uh oh. HAHAHA
Florida is about rules of the game, not whether voters should be left out. The real disgust should be with the national and Florida Democratic Party leadership that could not work out a way to make the VOTERS count.
However, after agreeing to the rules set out by the DNC, going in and claiming victory is just not fair. Hillary did not say anything about Michigan and Florida until she noticed she would be needing whatever push they may bring.
In conclusion: Florida voters do not matter thanks to DNC and the FL leadership, Hillary never cared until it was convenient: That is worth pointing out and make fun of!
hmmmm. Tasty tasty young wonkette. I can haz young Wonkette?
Did she send it via carrier pigeon? Are you accepting "Humor in Uniform" or "Life in These United States" submissions now?
If my reverends had used dropped more f-bombs maybe I'd still be going to church.
Dear Sirs,
You're site am bad. Me hate.
Love,
Rev. Will B. Dunn
She sho is crazy, but the Wonk does enjoy giving the 'Bommer long sloppy Beej's at the expense of Hilldog.
Women seeking power should not be criticized. If you do criticize, that means you hate women.
You're either for us or against us.
I am so sorry. I will miss her so much. What a positive influence.
If you were a Catholic priest with a vagina I would take you more seriously. Schismatics, unfortunatly, have a well deserved reputation for "flexibility" in matters of doctrine & dogma. I predict you'll grow more inclusive over time, and be back at Wonkette before Barry's first term is over, typing "mea culpa" in the little box -- or a much more protestant "my bad."
Rev. Al is gonna vote for Nader or Huckabee anyway.
yeah! And quit talking nice about Barry Hussein, Walnuts, Mittens, America's Loser, Huckaboo...
Its not like we don't love Hillary, we just don't love her in that crazy way that Clintonistas do.
If Wonkette was a real threat to Hillary, Wonkette would be in Ft. Marcy Park, covered in carpet fibers.
Obama hates ovaries.
...and I have worked HARD to promote the concept of Hillary Hottness!
@Hot_Carl: Are you accusing us of trying to help that godless muslim chain-smoking half-kenyan kansan Hawaiian slumlord who votes "present" cuz that's how they roll in Illinois? What's his name, with the hope? Ah haha haha.
So Billary using Obama as a punching bag and trying to steal delegates by claiming victories in Florida and Michigan is good Christian behavior, then? "Come fucking on."
Scientologists will ensure Florida counts. Tommy Cruise can solve any problem - only he can do it, and he knows it.
"My friend in Florida is pretty upset that you and the rest of the media talking heads think her vote means nothing."
If only there were some state-run political committee that her friend could blame. Fuck, she can't find it. Might as well get pissy at a political snark blog.
A poem in honor of the occasion:
In this year's horse race
Now there are two
The rest will be sent
Off to make glue.
Another Paulard recruit for Jesus.
Oh cookie, don't be mad. Wonkette hates just about everyone. Not even fuzzy baby pandas get a pass.
"Good job at eating our young Wonkette"
gross. this ain't redstate, lady.
What really matters is all the different ways we can be screwed in Nov... I'm counting at least 8... Nope 7 now.
Isn't Wonkette showing women (or should I say, 'us girls' or something instead?) that they count by snarking just as much as they would for a man? I know I feel empowered by it! I think if she really wants her vote to count, she needs to move to a state where the populace has proven time and again they are actually capable of voting and won't torpedo the entire process.
Typical hysterical female reaction. Get me a beer, bitch
Let's chip in for some flowers, and it will all be better.
@Truculent: nice
I can't help but notice how much more coherent a ranting Dem is than a ranting Rep - aka Rightwing_King of MySpace fame. Thank you, you sassy liberal preacher, for being literate.
Forgive us Rev. We know not what we do. Any by the way it wasn't Wonkette who told Florida Democrats their vote was meaningless... it was the Democratic party.
See ya, Rev. Don't let the door hit you in the crucifix on the way out.
Um, yeah I'm a woman and I think that crying for what you want is not exactly the best way to get my vote.
Also, screaming and nagging and sounding like my beautiful mother in law doesnt do it for me either.
Cant I just NOT LIKE HER without being a traitor to my sex? Cant I? Please? If it makes you feel any better, I dont like Obama either... am I now a traitor to my minority-ness?
Gah... in the imortal words of a douche who got banned:
Go fuck yourself.
"Reverend Allyson," eh? That is a person who uses the spelling "womyn" without the sarcasm, I can almost guarantee it.
Anyway, shame on you Wonkette writers for mocking the woman and the black guy and the pretty boy and the crazy military guy and the cyborg Mormon guy and the hick preacher and the Ron Paul! They have feelings too, you know.
@Ken Layne: That's what is weird. She reads the Obama snark and says "Well, yeah" but reads the Hillary snark and gets panty-twisted? Sheesh.
And what kind of Reverend reads Wonkette anyway?
Wish her to Peace Island.
This is absolutely fucking outrageous.
I am so sorry Allyson - you will be missed, and we will definitely let the powers that be know that you will be missed, and that they might lose page views.
What the hell is going on here?
Bill Clinton! Stop writing letters to Wonkette. So undignified for a former president! We get it, the left isn't being fair to Hills. Gotcha. Noted. KTHXBAI.
@Jonathan_Fisk: It would be truly awesome if Bill's online secret identity was "Reverend Allyson."
If it paid well enough, Hillary would be perfectly happy to be Wonkette's punching bag. She'll need something to do after she loses.
@LittlePig: I think that's pretty common.
I think it's a shame that she won't get to read about herself on Wonkette now that she's taken it off of her "reader".
If you think we're hard on Hillary, wait until the GOP and the 501(c)organizations begin their attacks. They will show no mercy.
"My friend in Florida is pretty upset that you and the rest of the media talking heads think her vote means nothing."
It's sad to see another voter disillusioned. Reminds me of the moment I realized my vote didn't count. Don't worry kid, you'll get over it. Chain smoking helps.
"PS - And oh, one more thingy. Phuleeeze stop givin' that GW guy in the big white house a free ride! You Wonkettes just worship him!"
@Rev. Peter Lemonjello: Meant in the truest form of sarcasm. The views expresed do not reflect my actual state of mind
Allyson: Don't get mad! Get snarky!
(Besides, how are you gonna be the first on your block to know about the coming Obama-backlash if you leave?)
I'm a woman but would never vote for Hillary Clinton!
HILLBILLY's past is peppered with their unethical and questionable actions; White Water, Dan Foster, Monica, etc. Let's not forget BILLARY'S impeachment for perjury. And those who are scared of BILLARY wandering the White House with nothing to do!
Clinton has yet to stand alone, as a woman who is truly confident of running for President. BILLARY is running her show.
Who needs or wants a co-Presidency?
Clinton continues to have others speak her mind, NOW wagging their finger at Kennedy for supporting OBAMA.
NOW needs to see the light regarding Clinton's loss of popularity and OBAMA'S rise to ROCK STAR status!
It's my understanding that Wonkette uses *everybody* as a punching bag. It's just hard to punch Obama without disheveling Teh Pretteh.
...and it's always someone's FRIEND. It's never the person. If your FRIEND is aggrieved, shouldn't THEY be doing the writing? Maybe your FRIEND is just making an obligatory 3 minutes of conversation before ringing off.
So when do women start getting pissed at the concept that they need to vote for Hillary solely because of her anatomy?
@Enthusiasm...Curbed: It's sad to see another voter disillusioned. Reminds me of the moment I realized my vote didn't count. Don't worry kid, you'll get over it. Chain smoking helps.
Ha! I live in North Carolina, my vote for President has never counted.
She should tell her friend in Florida that we think her vote means LESS than nothing, coming as it does from someone from Florida. They should stick to voting in wet t-shirt contests and "dunkie butt" competitions.
Perhaps I don't understand the community here. It's not like this is Gawker (OK, so, well, it is)...I think just about everybody is here because we care about politics. I'd also hazard a guess that most people who post here would much rather have "Hitlery" be president of 9/11 than either McCain or Mr. Plastic Hair--we kid because we love.
Having said that, here are two pieces of advice for the rev:
Who we elect mostly matters in terms of how we feel--it will have very little effect on how we live, that battle is over. It would be nice if we could at least express a little rage at the dying of the light, ya know, rev?
& secondly, why don't you go host a neo-pagan pancake breakfast is in your blank walled, light beige, might as well be the meeting room at the local Holiday Inn "church"--I'm sure you'll feel much better about everything.
Who else will warn us about the HRC's evil camel toe? And her panty lines, her authoritarian pants suits, and other important things we need to know to make our votes count?
Thankfully, I can see there are many other ecclesiastics here in support like Rev. Dunn and The Right Rev. Anus, along with NASCAR great Dick Sprinkles. I feel in pretty good company.
Tell your friend in Florida that they can have their vote back when they can learn to punch a hole in a voting ballot.
(too far?)
Is this her?? Please please please let this be her:
[www.myspace.com]
A Haiku:
First Ted Kennedy,
Now Wonkette betrays the vadge,
Hey, come fucking on.
I used to visit this site everyday for the humor. Unfortunately, you are so wrapped up in your anti-Hillary attitude that you can't even see that you are not funny anymore. Some of the posts don't even attempt to be funny - they just criticize. I think I visit Wonkette about once a week or once every 2 weeks just out of nostalgia. And, I used to be an Obama supporter. You, his campaign and the rest of the media have me seriously considering voting for a Republican in November.
@PrairiePossum: he he he
Actually, I only want Hiltery to win because of another entertaining eight years with Bubba. But if WALNUTS! wins we have an entertaining eight years with his beloved Mom. And if Barry Hussein wins we have his pisst-off lip-biting wife and matching black turtlenecks! An embarrasment of riches!
Headline: emotional, irrational Hillary supporters have no sense of humor.
(that one HAS to be too far.)
@LionsRoar: Rock Star/Slumlord for President!
Fart.
@DEM08: good luck on that. the republicans dont even have a republican running.
Once you realize that the Diebold machines have already been programmed with November's results, Snark becomes a great alternative.
Anyone want to lay odds that the good reverend is a Jezebel regular? The Jeztards make the Paultards look reasonable. Is there any way they can be permanently eradicated? Can we join forced with the Paultards much as FDR allied with Stalin in order to guarantee their certain demise?
@El Bombastico: yikes! the only things missing there are pictures of French clowns and Wolves in a snowy forest.
Thanks, Reverend F-Bomb.
Kind of saps any credibility, doesn't it?
Hey! There really
is one
@cheerupsylvia: my bet is it's this lady
[www.youtube.com]
hmmm...somebody who takes Wonkette postings seriously. We must track down the other two.
@DEM08: In all seriousness-- what did wonkette, Obama and "the rest of the media" do to change your mind? What did Obama do? And why would that lead you to want to vote Republican? That doesn't even make sense.
You could make an argument that the site is anti-Paul, but I think saying anti-Clinton is a pretty far stretch.
With that said@Hart88: I've been pissed about that for a long time. I hate the idea that I have to vote for Clinton or I'm a bad feminist or a bad woman.
@DEM08: Hey, as centrist as Hillary and Barry are, I'll feel like voting for a Republican anyway.
Old-school Republican, of course, from back before 'Republican' meant 'batshit crazy fear-mongering plutocrat'.
@Hart88: Yeah, I don't think that's her -- this girl's surname seems to be "Newell", which raises a whole host of OTHER questions.
But the page is pure gold, what with all the earth mother/unicorn/hobbit bullshit. Plus Tina Fey.
@DEM08: bu then you'll have to change your name, dem08. oh noz! may i suggest repuke08?