McCain Soars On Glorious Wings of Magnificent Ancient Pheonix!

Ooh, the new issue of Time has our friend WALNUTS! on the cover with a new nickname: The Phoenix. I get it, it’s because (a) he had burned and died but somehow still lives and (b) Phoenix is a town in Arizona, which he represents in the Congress! Is it maybe time to retire WALNUTS! for “The Phoenix?” Never. His campaign may rise and fall, but his torture cheeks shall eternally swell for America. [via Jonathan Martin]