Financial Panic(!) To Steal Our Babies, Kill Concept of Fun

This recession scare, it's real. Too real! The Federal Reserve, much to Ron Paul's dismay, lowered the fed funds rate by 3/4 of a percentage point today to stave off a, hrm, bank panic of neo-Victorian proportion!

Keep in mind that these old grandfolk usually stew their heads for eons before announcing that even a 1/4-point change is taking place. Now they apparently don't give a flying fuck, so it's free money. Also, all yr stocks probably crashed, because the move showed that the moneyhandlers know a recession is coming. But Ronald Reagan told us that only our neighbor loses his or her job during a recession, so haha! Sucks to be my neighbor. [ AP/Yahoo ]