McCain to Fix Economy With Greenspan's Corpse

While Dipshit McGoo Thompson thinks the economy can be saved by calling it "boring," respectable old man John McCain has an even more WALNUTS! plan to fix it: make Alan Greenspan do it.

WALNUTS!, it's a funny joke laden with serious implications!:

After decrying the length and complexity of the U.S. tax code, McCain vowed to establish a bipartisan commission that would capitalize on the gravitas of former Federal Reserve chairman Alan Greenspan, no matter how he is faring by the time this committee finally materializes.

"I want to set up a committee headed by Alan Greenspan, whether he's alive or dead, it doesn't matter," he said, prompting laughter from the crowd. "If he's dead, we'll prop him up and put dark glasses on him, like in 'Weekend at Bernie's.'"

Haha yes that very hilarious movie from the 1920s! I got a free copy of it one time from Papa John's after ordering its "two extra large one-topping w/two liter Pepsi!!" special. Actually, they only gave me the silly sequel (above). Either way, that was when I knew, I knew that John McCain would be president of economy one day, and the Rand-y who can't handle major market bubbles would be his viceroy.

 McCain's Economic Strategy: Bring in Greenspan [The Trail]