Dear President Bush:
Thank you for your letter of December 3. The Supreme Leader of the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea and best natural golfer in the world asked me to write to inform you that he feels he has done a more than adequate job of revealing our nuclear resources. We will not be responding to further requests for clarification. Please remit further fuel, oil and steel payments to this address per our agreement, as we plan to continue to bolster our war-deterrent capabilities and don’t wish to have to buy those things ourselves while we’re spending our limited resources on our nuclear weapons program. Again, thank you for your concerns, but they are completely unfounded.