Update: Final Hostage Released, Suspect Alone Without Beer

It looked eerily calm in Rochester tonight, as the reported fourth and final hostage strolled out of Hillary Clinton’s campaign office on Main Street with a file tucked under her arm as if she, you know, just finished another day making cold calls for cash. Leland Eisenberg, now out of beer and sober, will presumably be cuffed and dragged out any minute. MSNBC is on a one minute delay in case there’s some graphic violence. Chris Matthews just said he understands psychos. Awesome. Stay tuned!