Wonkette

* Heard on the Hill: TMZ wanted to make Loretta Sanchez the “Paris Hilton of DC” … Unmarked Cap Police car stolen… Senior Aide to Rep. Mike Rogers arrested for domestic violence. [Roll Call]
* Reliable Source: Someone stole some art from the Artomatic… Christina Ricci was here! [WP]
* Yeas and Nays: Pelosi’s got a biographer… Sam Waterson non-partisan Unity08 blah blah blah… Moms Norah O’Donnell parties books blah blah blah… Clinton presidency would make Bill “ambassador to the world.” Kucinich would give that made-up job to Jimmy Carter. [Examiner]
* Under the Dome: Jim McCrery refuses to hang out with poor Chuck Rangel… Bill Clinton chairing congressional black caucus’ golf and tennis tourney. Oh wait, Obama’s on that caucus! … 53 Republicans voted against a bill naming a goddamn Post Office for Rachel Carson. [The Hill]
* Shenanigans: This too crazy and dumb to summarize: “White House press secretary Tony Snow and his band, Beats Workin’, will face off against legendary CBS newsman Bob Schieffer and Honky Tonk Confidential at the National Press Club’s first-ever battle of the bands, “Honky Tonk Meets the White House Wonk,” at the Club on May 14.” … Skits performed by politicians sound even more terrible than you’d imagine… Joe Biden mocked by William Shatner… Iraq vote might imperil South Carolina debate! [Politico]
* The Sleuth: Hillary guest-blogged on Firedoglake. Hey, Hill, we could use some time off, wanna sit in for a day or two? [WP]