Aren’t you glad George Allen lost his senate seat for calling Jim Webb’s Indian guy a Tunisian monkey in Italian or something? Yes, Macaca George was a racist dingbat in love with a prop football and slavery, but he wasn’t a heavily armed lunatic.
The emerging and evolving story of Webb’s aide being arrested and jailed for trying to sneak a loaded handgun and tons of ammo into the Russell Senate Office building is starting to sound like a hilarious outtake from “Pulp Fiction.” Yesterday we learned that Webb and his ninja gunmen had sacks of weapons when they showed up at National airport, so Webb was forced to leave his guns with the staffers for his flight to Beirut or wherever, and then there were guns everywhere and nobody was keeping track and next thing you know this former Marine has put one of Webb’s loaded semi-automatic pistols (or maybe even a Micro Uzi) in a briefcase — along with two fully loaded extra magazines — through the X-Ray machine and the Capitol cops lock him up.
Read Webb’s delusional Conrad Burns-esque excuses, after the jump.
First of all, fuck Katherine Harris and her goofy Starbucks orders. We now have a seething rage-filled heavily-armed maniac in Congress, and he’s even a senator! It’s cool that he’s sticking by his ex-Marine buddy Army Times journalist novelist Webb staffer, Phillip Thompson, but he’s not even really doing that, because he denies any responsibility for the gun being in Thompson’s possession.
Webb says the incident was “unfortunate,” although we’d argue that it’s best to catch these people before they start shooting.
“I think this is one of those very unfortunate situations where, completely inadvertently, he took the weapon into the Senate,” says Senator Pulsing Forehead Veins, neglecting to explain how or why a staffer who was not licensed to carry a weapon was doing just that at a Capitol Hill government building.
A concealed-carry site called Packing.org sums it up for registered gun owners coming to D.C.:
When Visiting DC your best course of action is to leave all weapons at home. Even small pocket knives are not welcome in Government Buildings. Most buildings in DC are Government Buildings. You will have to go through Metal Detectors to get into some Government Buildings. The Mint, White House, Capital and even the Smithsonian and others. Large bags are not allowed in most buildings. Get info from the Government Agency you are planning to visit. Remember that your items will be searched. Big bags will just take longer to search and hold you up.
Washington has the strictest gun laws in the nation and probably the world — which is why there’s no crime in D.C. — and every gun owner knows this. That’s why the Supreme Court gun-ban ruling was such a big deal to NRA people. Washington D.C. defines stringent gun laws.
The NRA makes it very clear on its website: “Carrying a handgun in the District is prohibited. All firearms are to be kept at ones home or place of business.”
You can and will be arrested for just carrying ammunition! This is well known.
To cite a specific example that a reader witnessed, a construction worker at a government building, opened his truck’s glove box to get its registration for a police officer who had requested it. The officer observed a box of .22 Long Rifle ammunition in the glove box (I saw it too) and promptly arrested the man and took him off in handcuffs for “possession of unregistered ammunition.” There was no firearm present.
So, the staffer is screwed. Of course he’ll get off without any jail time and the case will probably be dropped because he’s white and presumably doesn’t have a police record. But what about Webb? Should he be wandering the district armed with enough bullets to kill dozens of people?
Webb says he has a concealed carry permit from Virginia, which is no doubt true. But there’s no mention of having such a permit in D.C. He could get one and maybe he has done so, but you’d think he might mention that fact, because it would be a big deal. D.C. is so strict about people carrying guns that the mayor and the chief of police have to approve the license.
The Chief of Police of the District of Columbia may, upon the application of any person having a bona fide residence or place of business within the District of Columbia or of any person having a bona fide residence or place of business within the United States and a license to carry a pistol concealed upon his or her person issued by the lawful authorities of any State or subdivision of the United States, issue a license to such person to carry a pistol within the District of Columbia for not more than 1 year from date of issue, if it appears that the applicant has good reason to fear injury to his or her person or property or has any other proper reason for carrying a pistol and that he or she is a suitable person to be so licensed. The license shall be in duplicate, in form to be prescribed by the Mayor of the District of Columbia and shall bear the name, address, description, photograph, and signature of the licensee and the reason given for desiring a license. The original thereof shall be delivered to the licensee, and the duplicate shall be retained by the Chief of Police of the District of Columbia and preserved in his or her office for 6 years.
Oh, and if those magazines hold more than 12 rounds apiece, D.C. considers that pistol a machine gun.
But who cares about the law? Webb says he needs to be surrounded by loaded guns nobody can keep track of because it’s “a dangerous time” for politicians. Why so dangerous? 9/11 9/11 9/11! Sure, no politicians were harmed on 9/11, and a handgun wouldn’t be a particularly effective weapon against an airliner going 500 mph into a building, but you never know what could happen next!
The LA Times reports: “Webb pointed out that police are assigned to protect the president and other high-ranking executive-branch officials but not members of Congress.”
Well, that’s fine and all, but it’s not exactly true. Members of Congress and their staffs are protected at work by the Capitol Police, who bravely caught a heavily armed guy trying to sneak into a Senate office building on Monday.
“We are required to defend ourselves, and I chose to do so,” Webb said.
Or not. ABC News reports that he also said this: “I have never carried a gun in the Capitol complex and I did not give the gun to Phillip Thompson.”
Great job defending yourself, Webb!
Actually, all he “chose to do” was lose track of his LOADED WEAPONS and somehow allowed a staffer with NO LEGAL RIGHT to wander around the U.S. CAPITOL with a LOADED SEMI-AUTOMATIC PISTOL.
Sen. Webb backs aide with gun — ‘dangerous time’ for politicians [LA Times]
Washington DC: Laws and Summaries [Packing.org]
UPDATE: Jim Webb’s Gun-Toting Staffer Also a Marine & Will Kill Us All
BREAKING: JIM WEBB HIMSELF ACTUALLY ARRESTED!
STAFFER ARRESTED IN WEBB GUN SCANDAL (MAYBE)