Wonk’d: Crispy Twister Sandwich is Its Own Happy Ending

Those interested in the commuting, eating, and theater habits of John Bolton , Evan Bayh, Grover Norquist, and Sam Donaldson will find this week’s Wonk’d to their taste. Those more interested in the handjob “Tucker Carlson” got in a KFC bathroom from one of DC’s famous tranny hookers will also be well served by reading on.

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* At 12:30 am last night [2/15], I stumbled across a drunk Tucker Carlson peeing into the men’s room sink at the KFC just north of Cleveland Park on Connecticut. He appeared to be with a very ugly stripper, or a hot transvestite. They were snickering, and appeared to be in good spirits as she/he helped him shake his wee wee. The only other car in the parking lot was a late model BMW 5 series, dark green. I’m assuming it didn’t belong to one of the three employees. [LOL THIS IS A JOKE and you'd have to be a complete fucking idiot not to see that.]
* I saw Sam Donaldson last night (22 Feb) at the Kennedy Center. Dude has a hot wife who’s like twenty years younger than him. His hair is wonderful: it’s not a comb-over — more of a wrap around.
* Today [2/21] at 3:30 PM: I saw John Bolton walking on M St. towards Connecticut Ave probably coming from AEI where he is plotting to bomb Iran. He looked angry and constipated though his moustache was thick and well-groomed.
* Saw Evan Bayh eating dinner at Marcel’s on Penn last Sunday pm (2/18) with a woman I assumed was his wife and two older couples. Mostly minded my own business but I did at one point hear them all laughing about Bush’s approval rating.
* Saw ABC News White House correspondent Martha Raddatz leaving the Brooks Brothers in Dupont Circle, on President’s Day looking a little surly.
* I saw Grover Norquist on the red line toward Shady Grove yesterday (2/16) afternoon. Clearly, none of the money funneled through ATR went to buying a company car and he’s forced to ride with the average folk. He stood by the door the whole time, occasionally consulting his PDA.
* I saw James Carville at GW on Monday [2/12], apparently going to speak to a group of College Democrats. He was dressed casually, in jeans and a sweater, and stopped to chat for a bit with a few people on the way in. Seemed pretty friendly in person.
* Last Friday (1/16) I saw a very distinguished looking former Senator Tom Daschle at the Townhouse Bar in New York City, a hot spot for older gentlemen and their admirers. He was surrounded by a couple of admiring “aides.”
* Saw Frank Luntz walking on Eye st. last Wednesday (2/14). I was close enough to see that he was carrying a copy of his own book. Worst haircut I’ve ever seen.

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Hola wonkerados.

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