Wonkette

As the nation pretends to mourn our pretend president, what people are really thinking about is Bob Dole’s smooth ‘n sexy new look.The hundred-year-old husband of North Carolina Senator Elizabeth Dole looked so youthful and dashing on a recent Fox News appearance that everybody is now pretty sure he had elaborate plastic surgery. We just think he looks like the Phantom of the Opera, whom we’re pretty sure was supposed to be scary, not pretty.

Did Bob Dole Go Under the Knife? [Style Dash]