Minnesota is filthy with Lutherans of all varieties — there are apparently numerous little denominations known as “synods,” which means “crazy Swedes.” And 6th District GOP candidate Michele Bachmann belongs to one of these Lutheran sects that holds the common and unoffensive belief that “the Pope is the very Antichrist.”
Predictably, the liberals have their sex-disease-stained panties bunched up over Bachmann’s faith. These atheists don’t even understand what the Antichrist is supposed to be, because they’re terrorists who are always getting high on dope and having gay abortions with communists.
We will edumacate you people and prove why Michele Bachmann will be the best congresswoman ever, after the jump.
Look, we’ll give it to you straight: Martin Luther invented the “protestant” religion because the Catholics said “Catholic” meant “universal.” This was during an era when the Popes were a murderous bunch of thieving drunken war-addicted scumbags who enjoyed gluttony and rape. (Today, secular politicians fill this important social role.) Luther — ironically a Catholic himself — decided his new religion would give the Germans a reason to learn to read because they would now have their own bible.
And 400 years later, some Lutherans are still around. Mostly in Minnesota and Wisconsin.
Besides accurately identifying the Pope as the Antichrist, Martin Luther also taught us important lessons about the people who killed Jesus and are always trying to take money from Lutherans — you know, the Jews. In his popular book “The Jews and Their Lies,” Luther explained all the ways that the Jewish “vermin” make God sick to his stomach and what Germans must do to punish the evil Jews: burn their synagogues, destroy their homes, etc. It was actually Luther and not Borat who wrote these words: “Instead they might be lodged under a roof or in a barn, like the gypsies.”
Antichrist buzz brings Bachmann camp denials [Star Tribune]
STATEMENT ON THE ANTICHRIST [Wisconsin Evangelical Lutheran Synod]
The Jews and Their Lies [Martin Luther]
EARLIER: Meet the Antichrist